Aa
3 more weeks...
Dh has been looking for a job for the past year (Thank you crappy economy) since he got out of the Marines. We've been arguing about money, jobs and who's going to work. (I've been looking and told him whoever gets a job first works. He says no he wants me to stay home with the kids and keep at my writing, doing what I love.) So it's stressful. He's been talking about going back to the Corps. He's giving it 3 weeks. 3 weeks....I have no issues with it. When we started dating I told him if he wanted to stay in that was fine and I'd go wherever he did. The problem now...the parents. Not his. Mine. He broke the news (after a few beers, margaritas and other drinks) at our 4th of July party...to everybody. Friends, family...everybody. I was a bit upset. I wanted to wait until he was 100% positive on his decision before we told everybody. My mom, needless to say, was NOT happy. Dad did what he does best. Was completely indifferent. My friends, not happy.
How do I smooth things over with at least the mom for now? I know my friends will get over it.
How do I smooth things over with at least the mom for now? I know my friends will get over it.
I'm not sure if he even thought of being a recruiter. (He hates them believe it or not. lol) He was in Iraq so yeah he's a combat vet. That's one thing I'm completely paranoid about, him reenlisting, us moving and then oh your off to where ever the war zone is now and I'm back to worrying every single day like before.
Is the recruiter option available? Though if he is a combat vet, that might be unpalatable.
Dh isn't that old though. He just turned 25 and if he goes back to active duty we'll be shipped off somewhere else.
I know that you might have to go where ever they need your husband, but sometimes they make exceptions for the older marines putting them in a local location. My next door neighbor re signed for the marines and somehow got to stay put. They're not moving at all. Maybe that can happen? I don't know. Good luck with it.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Since you are not working and with the boys-------- during the toddler years, perhaps you can take them to visit by yourself too. And your parents can visit you. We have friends whose parents live out of town and they take their older kids (the are elementary age) for 6 weeks every summer.
It IS a sad thing to move from family. Maybe your mom will have another suggestion for you. But you have to do what you have to do. Hard hard situation.
It IS a sad thing to move from family. Maybe your mom will have another suggestion for you. But you have to do what you have to do. Hard hard situation.
No it's not forever. Well I don't know. I do have a feeling if he would re sign he'd end up being a lifer this time. No matter how much he says he doesn't like it...he's a Marine to his core.
We will definitely plan visits. He'll get 1 week/year of leave so we'd be able to visit.
I'm not keeping my hopes up on him finding a job in 3 weeks. He's been looking for over a year now, that would be some seriously awesome luck.
We will definitely plan visits. He'll get 1 week/year of leave so we'd be able to visit.
I'm not keeping my hopes up on him finding a job in 3 weeks. He's been looking for over a year now, that would be some seriously awesome luck.
COMMUNITY LEADER
It IS so hard to split up from family but it is not forever, right? You have to take care of your new family first. I know it would break my heart to take my kids from a beloved Grandma (wish their's were living)--------- but you will plan visits. And you will have a goal of getting back to where your mom is.
Okay---------- he has 3 weeks to find a job. You have 3 weeks to discuss it further. It is NOT a done deal yet, so think about it some more.
Okay---------- he has 3 weeks to find a job. You have 3 weeks to discuss it further. It is NOT a done deal yet, so think about it some more.
She did know there was a possibility of him going back so it shouldn't have been a huge shocker for her.
I didn't really plan on mentioning it to anyone yet. Dh just...drank his mouth open. lol. I do know that she's just worried and doesn't want us to move away. I don't know what to say to her though. This is the furthest I've ever been from her and dh and I have the first grandchildren which she is REALLY attached to them. (They are grandma's guys.)
I didn't really plan on mentioning it to anyone yet. Dh just...drank his mouth open. lol. I do know that she's just worried and doesn't want us to move away. I don't know what to say to her though. This is the furthest I've ever been from her and dh and I have the first grandchildren which she is REALLY attached to them. (They are grandma's guys.)
COMMUNITY LEADER
Well, just be honest with her and say this was a new discussion between the two of you and nothing is definate and you are doing the best you can. Ask her for her support as you need it and tell her you love her and are trying to be a good wife and mother.
She'll understand. She is hurt you hadn't mentioned it to her yet and just explain that you hadn't had a chance and it is in the planning stages and on the other side of it she is worried as good moms do.
Just be honest with her.
She'll understand. She is hurt you hadn't mentioned it to her yet and just explain that you hadn't had a chance and it is in the planning stages and on the other side of it she is worried as good moms do.
Just be honest with her.
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