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Influence of bad genes
Hi, I have a question related to the impact of bad genes on next generation. I'm dating with a girl and would be getting married soon. She has a brother who is mentally dumb. I do not say he is mad or mentally handicapped. But he is very dumb, not active. When we met before many times, the only impression I had about him was that he might be bit shy and reserved, but the fact is he is challenged. My girl friend is perfectly fine. She does not have any such problems, atleast not visible. I'm not sure if such problem is dormant inside her. I'm not a person knowledgeable in this area and can't make any judegement. At this point, I'm only worried about the impact of her brother's genes (Which might also be in my girl friend, both being blood related) on our future kids. Any possibility of such event, we need to plan accordingly about our future. Any experts advice is highly appreciated.
ThanksRN
ThanksRN
OK SO...it is a little unclear about the brothers problem and if MR is mentally retarded...so first you need to find out what he has cause their are many disorders that you may classify the person to be delayed developmentaly(please if you write this in any other forum DO NOT USE THE TREM DUMB)
first their is always a possibility, it is higher depending on age of the women
i believe that their are test that can be taken during a pregnancy to determine the "risk" "probability" that the child will have down syndrome but it is very risky ...i think that they have a test for before pregnancy test but it is really only given when one partner has a terminal illness that may arise later in life....but really neither are 100%
I would say dont worry about it you will love your child no matter what and find a way to make it through if the challenge arises...or if you think that there is no way you could handle it and it is a huge fear discuss your concern and consider adopting
good luck...and again if you watch how you say things cause those who have children with a disability will not appreciate it, prob even your girlfriend. and if you do talk to your wife about adopting do your research about both the disabilities and aboption
Good Luck
first their is always a possibility, it is higher depending on age of the women
i believe that their are test that can be taken during a pregnancy to determine the "risk" "probability" that the child will have down syndrome but it is very risky ...i think that they have a test for before pregnancy test but it is really only given when one partner has a terminal illness that may arise later in life....but really neither are 100%
I would say dont worry about it you will love your child no matter what and find a way to make it through if the challenge arises...or if you think that there is no way you could handle it and it is a huge fear discuss your concern and consider adopting
good luck...and again if you watch how you say things cause those who have children with a disability will not appreciate it, prob even your girlfriend. and if you do talk to your wife about adopting do your research about both the disabilities and aboption
Good Luck
Dude, this seems like a VERY shallow question. If you love your girl, then don't worry about it. Hey, I am "dumb." I hated school and was lucky to get "C's." I entered the Air Force straight out of High School (though I did make a pretty good career of it).
On the other hand, my son is a genius. He excels at piano and excels at everything he does at school. He is pretty much a straight "A" student except for the occasional "B" now and then. And whereas I had to work hard for my "C's," my son has the worst study habits and STILL gets A's!!! The one bad trait he shares with me is being a bit shy. But he isn't nearly as shy as I was at his age. Plus I was pretty unemotional as a kid. He is VERY emotional!
You really cannot go by the traits of the parents as to how a child will turn out.
And, by the way, I don't think book smarts is all that is required to make a life for yourself. Even more important, you need courage and persistence. That is more important than a college degree. I know so many people with degrees in this that or the other and are warehouse workers! (Not to say that college graduates don't have the POTENTIAL to make two or three times what a non-graduate can make. But not all of them use that potential.)
Did you know that Albert Einstein had early speech difficulties? He never finished high school? He applied to go into a technical institute and failed the required entrance exam (since he hadn't graduated High School)?
My point is that you cannot tell what two sets of genes mixed up will bring as far as offspring goes. My boy is perfect in every way except he can fly into emotional extremes... and has a big gap between his front teeth. (Big orthodontics bill looming there! LOL)
If, on the other hand, he had a cleft palate or was a Downs syndrome boy, we would have STILL loved him just the same!
My prediction is that if you bring this up with your girlfriend, she will become highly offended. She may even drop you like a hot potato because you ARE being very shallow! You ARE talking about her brother after all. Forget about your though processes on this matter and move on with building a great relationship with your girlfriend!
On the other hand, my son is a genius. He excels at piano and excels at everything he does at school. He is pretty much a straight "A" student except for the occasional "B" now and then. And whereas I had to work hard for my "C's," my son has the worst study habits and STILL gets A's!!! The one bad trait he shares with me is being a bit shy. But he isn't nearly as shy as I was at his age. Plus I was pretty unemotional as a kid. He is VERY emotional!
You really cannot go by the traits of the parents as to how a child will turn out.
And, by the way, I don't think book smarts is all that is required to make a life for yourself. Even more important, you need courage and persistence. That is more important than a college degree. I know so many people with degrees in this that or the other and are warehouse workers! (Not to say that college graduates don't have the POTENTIAL to make two or three times what a non-graduate can make. But not all of them use that potential.)
Did you know that Albert Einstein had early speech difficulties? He never finished high school? He applied to go into a technical institute and failed the required entrance exam (since he hadn't graduated High School)?
My point is that you cannot tell what two sets of genes mixed up will bring as far as offspring goes. My boy is perfect in every way except he can fly into emotional extremes... and has a big gap between his front teeth. (Big orthodontics bill looming there! LOL)
If, on the other hand, he had a cleft palate or was a Downs syndrome boy, we would have STILL loved him just the same!
My prediction is that if you bring this up with your girlfriend, she will become highly offended. She may even drop you like a hot potato because you ARE being very shallow! You ARE talking about her brother after all. Forget about your though processes on this matter and move on with building a great relationship with your girlfriend!
Nobody can claims that he has 'good genes' while the other has ' bad genes' . Can you sure not one in your family generations before you has no history of delayed-developmentally /downsyndrome / schizo/autism/ADHD/etc ? I dont think so.
I agree with previous comments, don't ask. It shows your shallowness.
Good luck
I agree with previous comments, don't ask. It shows your shallowness.
Good luck
What has happened to the brother depends on whether he has a functional mental illness, or a physically related one,Also never say Dumb, It is not socially acceptable .
If this really bothers you ask the girl what has happened to the brother I see nothing wrong with asking her, but if you love this woman, i would make no comments on whether it mattered about future children,, as she will have nothing to do with you,
Another thing that bothers me is you say mentally dumb, now i guess that i really do not know what you are asking, maybe he is just slow, due to an accident and there is no mental problem at all why not spend more time with him and satisfy yourself, also if this woman is to be your future wife, why have you not spent more timw with her family.?
I am not to bright, and i would like to know what you mean when you say he is challenged jo
If this really bothers you ask the girl what has happened to the brother I see nothing wrong with asking her, but if you love this woman, i would make no comments on whether it mattered about future children,, as she will have nothing to do with you,
Another thing that bothers me is you say mentally dumb, now i guess that i really do not know what you are asking, maybe he is just slow, due to an accident and there is no mental problem at all why not spend more time with him and satisfy yourself, also if this woman is to be your future wife, why have you not spent more timw with her family.?
I am not to bright, and i would like to know what you mean when you say he is challenged jo
I have a feeling there is a language barrier here and "dumb" was as close as you could come to describing the brother.
I think concern about genes is VERY valid if you are considering having children - I'm a firm believer in nature vs. nurture, and I think you are basically handed your potential at birth - and you can look to the prior couple generations to find out where the pieces came from.
So it's a valid concern - but without knowing specifically what his delay is - it's impossible to give you any advice.
I think concern about genes is VERY valid if you are considering having children - I'm a firm believer in nature vs. nurture, and I think you are basically handed your potential at birth - and you can look to the prior couple generations to find out where the pieces came from.
So it's a valid concern - but without knowing specifically what his delay is - it's impossible to give you any advice.
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