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Massive arguement with pregnant girlfriend, who's in the wrong!?
I pushed pregnant girlfriend after arguement? who's in the wrong!?
Well, wednesday there was a party at work; bosses birthday, so we got him a stripper and she gave all of us a lap dance. I was in a relationship, but it was a party I didn't think it would hurt, they restricted my hand, and she just danced. I came home at 3am, expecting her to be asleep, I came in she was sitting on the couch, just staring at me.
I went in for a kiss, and she turned away and instantly smelt the perfume. And asked me where I was i said there was a party at the office, and then we went out. She asked if there were girls,I said of course, they are not gay. I said it in a really bad way, cuz I was tired and wasnt ready for this. She said "Your not worth my breath" and walked up stairs and threw my pillow outside and said, thats where I'm sleeping.
I said no, and tried to walk in but she stood in the way, so I kind of gently shoved her to get in, but then she stumbled back, and started crying as if I just punched her? I never hit women, but I did kind of shove her abit... hard. I just left the room, and gave her space.
Yesterday, we had a day off. I tried to talk to her, but she just walked past me, I later found out she went to the ultrasound scan, without me,and went with her friends. I tried to speak to her after, but she just dropped the photo on the table and went upstairs. Today she went to some, birth classes with her guy friend, i do not know wether she did this to spite me, but it hurt and I tried to "tell her off" about it, but she gave me the angriest face and just shut me up.
I really don't like her being mad at me I Love her so much! But I don't want to let her win this, cuz I don't believe I was in the wrong. My coworkers, said she is gonna use hormones to kill me,and she is trying to wait me out, If i give in she will exploit her "hormones" as a reason to win.
PLEASE HELP ME?
Well, wednesday there was a party at work; bosses birthday, so we got him a stripper and she gave all of us a lap dance. I was in a relationship, but it was a party I didn't think it would hurt, they restricted my hand, and she just danced. I came home at 3am, expecting her to be asleep, I came in she was sitting on the couch, just staring at me.
I went in for a kiss, and she turned away and instantly smelt the perfume. And asked me where I was i said there was a party at the office, and then we went out. She asked if there were girls,I said of course, they are not gay. I said it in a really bad way, cuz I was tired and wasnt ready for this. She said "Your not worth my breath" and walked up stairs and threw my pillow outside and said, thats where I'm sleeping.
I said no, and tried to walk in but she stood in the way, so I kind of gently shoved her to get in, but then she stumbled back, and started crying as if I just punched her? I never hit women, but I did kind of shove her abit... hard. I just left the room, and gave her space.
Yesterday, we had a day off. I tried to talk to her, but she just walked past me, I later found out she went to the ultrasound scan, without me,and went with her friends. I tried to speak to her after, but she just dropped the photo on the table and went upstairs. Today she went to some, birth classes with her guy friend, i do not know wether she did this to spite me, but it hurt and I tried to "tell her off" about it, but she gave me the angriest face and just shut me up.
I really don't like her being mad at me I Love her so much! But I don't want to let her win this, cuz I don't believe I was in the wrong. My coworkers, said she is gonna use hormones to kill me,and she is trying to wait me out, If i give in she will exploit her "hormones" as a reason to win.
PLEASE HELP ME?
You were completely wrong. You NEVER hit a woman, especially a pregnant woman!!! You her utter disrespect and you're just using her. You dont love her. Guys in love dont abuse and cheat on their wives or gf. If i were her i wld have called police rite after i dumped you.
You have one poster on here that said, you were both wrong initially, but later in the statement took it back. " You both were wrong honestly. I don't think she should have thrown your stuff outside that was wrong. However sleeping apart so you both could cool off was probably very smart"
100% of the members are trying to tell you the same thing here. I hope you try to become the man your wife and child deserves, and are not left to yours and your coworkers devices, for life. It would be a shame to lose you to the netherworld
Please don't follow your co workers. Please don't feel use peer pressure as the excuse to destroy your relationship. I left my first husband, the second time he went to spend his time in a strip club. The first time, i took as a naive mistake, the second time, it was because he had no respect for our relationship, and it was over. Know that to your wife, as it was with me, and many other women, dabbling in the sex trade is not an acceptable pursuit for the man of their dreams. I am now with a man who respects women too much to use them in any way as sexual objects, making love is where it's at , my friend. I hope you make the right decision for your wife and baby and do not become a statistic.
Many say that a man who abuses a woman physically once is probably going to continue on. The fact that you don't even know that "pushing your wife, is wrong tells me that you could definitely be one of the couples that don't make it.
Listen to what you said. " So I kind of gently shoved her to get in, but then she stumbled back, and started crying as if I just punched her? I never hit women, but I did kind of shove her abit... hard." So, by your own admission, and perhaps you're view is somewhat conservative, you shoved your pregnant wife "hard" and she stumbled back, and started crying. She started crying because she could have stumbled in a manner that she would lose her baby, and she blames you for that. Period. Secondary to the fact that you aggressively man handled her, is she aware that you're prone to peer pressure, and it's important for you to have the freedom to objectify women. What started out as her believing you are the man of her dreams, making love and creating a love child, she now has a completely different view of who you are as a man and a partner.
.
"When I was a child I spoke as a child I understood as a child I thought as a child; but when I became a man I put away childish things." I Cor. xiii. 11.
A virtuous manhood is much more to be desired than the state of children. It is capable of far nobler pursuits, of knowledge, enjoyment, and action more congenial with the ends of our being. The child has no high and manly aim, no cares for great and dignified things, little thought for his future well being either in this life or the life to come. His understanding is feeble, his knowledge is small, his pursuits and pleasures are useless to the world, his years are trifled away in pursuing airy visions, and he is a stranger to elevated and substantial happiness.
Please understand that many women that are in the sex trade are there because they have been abused by men, in their childhood. Not only are you insulting your wife to the highest degree, you are objectifying women who are vulnerable, and many times, thoroughly lost.
A virtuous manhood is much more to be desired than the state of children. It is capable of far nobler pursuits, of knowledge, enjoyment, and action more congenial with the ends of our being. The child has no high and manly aim, no cares for great and dignified things, little thought for his future well being either in this life or the life to come. His understanding is feeble, his knowledge is small, his pursuits and pleasures are useless to the world, his years are trifled away in pursuing airy visions, and he is a stranger to elevated and substantial happiness.
Please understand that many women that are in the sex trade are there because they have been abused by men, in their childhood. Not only are you insulting your wife to the highest degree, you are objectifying women who are vulnerable, and many times, thoroughly lost.
Yep!! What SM said,.
You handled the situation poorly, from beginning to end. Not too often do I think a party is blameless in a situation, but in this case...I think your GF was.
You did something that she was upset about, and instead of validating her feelings, and apologizing, you got defensive, and put your hands on her, which is NEVER okay.,
You're lucky she only threw your pillow out. I would have been far less understanding. I think maybe you have some maturing to do. You're in an adult relationship, soon to be a dad. You had this awful situation with your GF, and the biggest thing you're worried about is who was "right"? Not good.
You handled the situation poorly, from beginning to end. Not too often do I think a party is blameless in a situation, but in this case...I think your GF was.
You did something that she was upset about, and instead of validating her feelings, and apologizing, you got defensive, and put your hands on her, which is NEVER okay.,
You're lucky she only threw your pillow out. I would have been far less understanding. I think maybe you have some maturing to do. You're in an adult relationship, soon to be a dad. You had this awful situation with your GF, and the biggest thing you're worried about is who was "right"? Not good.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Hi there. Well, I think it is never okay to shove or push our partners when upset. There is no time i would condone such behavior.
Many women do indeed have a huge problem with strippers and lap dances. I would personally not like my husband doing this either. You could have handled the whole thing better by being understanding abo gut her feelings and showing her concern that you had upset her rather than becoming defensive.
Not sure what to tell you. I'd work on the communication and make sure you have a handle on any type of aggressive behavior.good luck
Many women do indeed have a huge problem with strippers and lap dances. I would personally not like my husband doing this either. You could have handled the whole thing better by being understanding abo gut her feelings and showing her concern that you had upset her rather than becoming defensive.
Not sure what to tell you. I'd work on the communication and make sure you have a handle on any type of aggressive behavior.good luck
Hi YHH,
just relax and let her ride this out. There are no winners with this as this is not a game. Your girl friend is pregnant and expects you to be by her side and you let her down. I think you should be more gentle with her and understanding as she is having your child. I think you have been through this before many times with her and has developed into a competition of personalities. I think your a bit harsh with her. The statement about asking if there were girls at the party and you said of course "they are not gay" shows you dont have much patience with her. She starting to see you as very irresponsible and part man and part boy. Do you plan on marrying her or is this another one of the iffy relationships where the man is using the girl for sex and an open ear to talk to?
just relax and let her ride this out. There are no winners with this as this is not a game. Your girl friend is pregnant and expects you to be by her side and you let her down. I think you should be more gentle with her and understanding as she is having your child. I think you have been through this before many times with her and has developed into a competition of personalities. I think your a bit harsh with her. The statement about asking if there were girls at the party and you said of course "they are not gay" shows you dont have much patience with her. She starting to see you as very irresponsible and part man and part boy. Do you plan on marrying her or is this another one of the iffy relationships where the man is using the girl for sex and an open ear to talk to?
In My Opinion You Should Apologize. You Shouldn't Have Pushed Her. Even after you did and she started crying the first thing you should have said was I'm sorry. I believe you letting your pride get in the way. You're gonna be a dad soon. Suck it up buy her flowers and say you're sorry! Forget about Your co workers and think about your unborn child and girl.
Not only were you wrong to even move her outta the way but you should more concerned and about your girlfriend that is pregnant then a stripper and partying. Now what would you have done if you were out and something happened to her and she ha no way to get ahold of you? How would you feel then? When it comes to the ultrasound you weren't worried about her when you had a stripper all over you why should she worry about how you feel? Then your coworkers are most likely saying that to make her feel like the bad guy. If you love her you wouldn't care about the hormones
Her hormones are not an "excuse" she's pregnant & hormonal...you got a lapdance which is wrong, you didn't tell her about it which is wrong, you pushed her which is wrong...she gave you the silent treatment & is ignoring you...consider yourself lucky & apologize like a man :) good luck!
You were wrong. Piint blank period. No women should be up on u except the one who is having ur baby. And then u pushed her.?? Smh.
You were wrong. I didnt even have to finish the story to figure this one out! A man should NEVER lay his hands on a female. Doesnt matter if you are"gentle" or not. You PUSHED her. She shouldve doubled up her fist and knocked the hellll out of you. Its bad enough you would push her to start with let alone while shes pregnant. Wth is wrong with u?#
All I read was I pushed pregnant gf that's all I'm reading your automatically wrong sorry that's just me I'm just against men putting hands on females my father didn't do it to me so that's something I just wont tolerate
Loool alie askin pregnet women if he could bush one of our prego sister.loool..HELL NOO SON.
Lol @ acline! Yu go girl haha i wouldn't get too worked up tho because I swear maybe 4 months ago the same story was posted asking the same exact thing.. I think sometimes ppl just want to see what kinda reaction they can get out of us
If this is a legit question I apologize but I have a hard time believing it is
If this is a legit question I apologize but I have a hard time believing it is
And this was probably the wrong place to come to to ask if it was wrong to push your pregnant girlfriend. WE'RE ALL PREGNANT HERE...hell yes you were in the wrong, point blank. And I would not only kick you in the balls, but I would chop them up and shove them down your throat. That's abuse.
Acline couldnt agree more. Serioud your coworker are not in your relationship you are they are not emotionally involved you are. If you love her an she is carrying your child you need to take responsility to ensure you look after her emotionally an if she was upset (which she had every right to be) than be a man enough to apologize. P.s you shouldnt hav never touch her an you need to apologize might how you gona bush the women she is carrying your baby mate. Best if luck an apologize an share the experience with her your missin out by being hard headed.
You're lucky you're not my boyfriend. I would have kicked you in the nuts. No way in hell would i let my boyfriend disrespect me by letting a woman dance all over him while I'm carrying his child. I don't think she was in the wrong at all. I wouldn't even think about speaking to my boyfriend for a while if he did something like that.
I dont want to be judge mental but if u saw the lady there you could of left, I would be upset to if u saw a man shakin his butt on your wife would u get mad even if she was being held done ? it seems like I would apoligize even if u dont think your wrong that way yall can talk through things. Just my opinion.
You both were wrong honestly. If you are in a relationship and having a baby with someone you need to take responsibility and not go to where there are strippers if your girl doesn't want you to. In my mind that is the same as cheating. You should not have touched her, pushed her in anyway, I mean you were upset like she was and when you are upset you don't control your
Strength as well. Your hormones were flaring as well. I don't think she should have thrown your stuff outside that was wrong. However sleeping apart so you both could cool off was probably very smart. As for the ultrasound you should have been informed about it before it happened because it is your child too and you should have gone to the class with her not another guy. It sounds like you both need to decide who you want to be In a relationship with. I hope this helps. Sometimes when you love someone even if you don't think you were wrong (which you were wrong in this case, both of you were) its best to be humble and fix things. Good luck to you and don't push her again just walk away if your upset.
Strength as well. Your hormones were flaring as well. I don't think she should have thrown your stuff outside that was wrong. However sleeping apart so you both could cool off was probably very smart. As for the ultrasound you should have been informed about it before it happened because it is your child too and you should have gone to the class with her not another guy. It sounds like you both need to decide who you want to be In a relationship with. I hope this helps. Sometimes when you love someone even if you don't think you were wrong (which you were wrong in this case, both of you were) its best to be humble and fix things. Good luck to you and don't push her again just walk away if your upset.
You were wrong. It doesn't matter how 'gentle' it was a true man NEVER does that to a women. Especially not a pregnant women. You also were with women and they were giving you a lap dance. Did you give her the curtisy of knowing this beforehand? No you're not on a leash but it's extremely disrespectful of her and how she feels.
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