Problems connecting with other people

[AJRC323]

First off, I've had social anxiety disorder since I was 16. Ever since I developed this problem, I've had problems with staying connected with friends that I've been able to make, and I'm basically afraid of women I find attractive. Sometimes I feel like I'd be burdening the few friends I have by telling them about my problems, so I basically never talk to them.

I'd love to be able to go out and make friends, get a girlfriend, not have to worry about what other people think about me, etc etc. This problem has caused me to go into a deep depression, which has recently been deemed treatment resistant. I do still take medication and see a therapist who specializes in young adults with anxiety and depression. He's a great therapist, and a cool guy, but I still can't seem to figure out my feelings, so we're very slowly making progress.

Any advice would be appreciated. On a side note, I have a much easier time talking about this stuff over the internet, but I want to succeed in personal contact. Thanks in advance for any advice.

[AJRC323]

That's another part of the problem. My depression has caused me to isolate myself more than the anxiety, because I just don't feel like doing anything. Sometimes I even have trouble getting out of bed due to it. Frustration is added because I've taken so many different medications and feel so alone, even around my family. I'm seeing my psychiatrist on Friday about yet again changing meds, and my parents are going to ask him about opiate treatments, because I've taken pretty much everything else. Vicodin does make me feel better (I took about 30 mgs a day for most of 2009 due to a strange migraine problem that suddenly went away).

The only thing my doc has mentioned recently has been electroshock therapy, and my family gave a unanimous "hell no" to that one. So this might be all I have until I can figure out how to open up to other people.

Oh, and I know some people will warn against opiate treatment for various reasons, and I appreciate the concern, but my family and I will deal with that if it's what needs to be done. I've done a lot of research on off-label treatments and the medication itself to make sure there won't be any long-term problems. Plus I've had my parents control any narcotic medications I've been given just incase, and that's worked out very well for us.

[Flavoured]

I think it has to do with how you feel about yourself. If you address that, you'll pretty much make a breakthrough in all other areas. All the best :)

[x89rt]

i can relate. i havent made much progress either, but im starting to learn how to start making friends. what i do is just ask them questions about them. you have to be careful not to bombard them or they will just think you are annoying. if they want to know about you, only answer the questions they ask. dont tell them about your problems. sometimes if you just answer cut and dry, they will think you dont really want to be friends so every once in a while say something about yourself like your favorite hobbies, sports, or anything like that. just make sure you dont talk much about your problems. from there on, getting closer to them kinda depends on you and them and how well you relate. eventually, if you are close enough, you can start talking about your problems a little more. other than that, my only advice is to be patient.