How do you get over an ex?

[sunshine_kisses]

my  ex boyfriend and i were toghter for a year and 2months. He was my first love hes really my first eveything. I loved him with all my heart and i believed he loved me to. We have had bad times to. He has a son and has cheated on me with his babys mom so i prob should of left him back then but i loved him and gave him another chance.  In march we broke up. We agreeed to stay friends. We broke up because we were always fighting and i was just finishing up highschool so i wanted some space and he wanted to focus on work and going back to school to so we agreed on a little space and remain friends well that all changed when his friend fixed him up with a girl.  When he first told me he was going on a date with her i got so upset and jealous bcecause we agreed we would be back toghter it was just space for now well now hes dating her and so happpy her with. I have not talked to him in a month because he told me he didn't want to talk to me anymore and that he was over me and the whole relationship.  Last night he texted me because he thought my friend was trying to talk to him to get us back toghter but my feiend wasn't but snce he did text me i told him the truth how i feel about him i told him i do love him still ad always will and that im jealous and i still believe we belong toghter and if your happy with her then great im happy for you but jealous i just thought u should know how i feel. He replies with " f you and get the h*** out of my life i don't want u back me moving on was the best thing i could of done. I don't love you now and i never did love you being with you was a waste of my time" and that hurt me so much i couldn't stop crying. I know i was not the best girlfriend i couldn't accept he had a son but im only 18 (hes 22) i just couldn't handle it i always tried but couldn"t =(   i said pretty messed up things to him and i got angry quick, jealous, and was not understanding with anything. His new gf is 24 and loves his son and treats him well.  I regret being who i was i wish i could of accepted his son and was better to him but he did cheat on me so it was hard for me to accept  a lot but now i hate myself. What if hes the one? what if i just lost him for good and theres no one else for me now? I just need to vent out my feelings and need some advice because my friends arn't the best to go to advice on.

[sunshine_kisses]

Thank you for all your advice, i know hes not worth it and i know i will get through it. Its just tough but thank you.

[imanaddict]

I agree with Teko, he is NOT the one! If he were, the feelings you have for him would be reciprocated. He would love and cherish you and there wouldn't be a new girlfriend in the picture, or even thoughts of another woman. He treated you badly and said some pretty harsh things, which definitely hurts but it's also a blessing in disguise although you may not feel that way right this minute.

One day will come where the right guy will walk into your life and you will finally know what REAL love is all about. You won't have those insecurities and have to worry about being cheated on. You usually have to kiss a few toads to get to your Prince so don't be in too much of a rush. A good thing could pass you by while you're stuck in a rut with a jerk.

It will get easier, I promise. Give it some time, hang out with friends, do some shopping, pamper yourself, pick up some hobbies, whatever it takes to help keep your mind off all the hurt. Time does heal all wounds!

I wish you all the best!

[teko]

I promise he is NOT the one. Why do you feel like you need him so much. He sounds like a real creep and it concerns me that you think that kind of talk comes from a loving relationship. It does not. Your better off without him. You will get over it and you will move on and one day when you look back you will think, Thank God! Seriously you need to concentrate on you. Jealousy is more a sign of your own insecurity than having anything to do with what a man may or may not do.

[Judy246]

p.s.....don't forget to pamper yourself. Go shopping for you, get your hair done. Be good to yourself and you don't have to show him nothing, but do it for you.

[Judy246]

Wow, your going through a tough time, but I promise with time you will see that great big rainbow in the sky. I belive that once a cheater, always a cheater and you should have listen you that little voice inside that said, "he's cheating on me". We are all gifted with that six sense and should listen to it more often. We could have avoided hurting so much now.

First, you have to accept the loss. Do not look back. You must move forward slowly. It's going to take one day at a time and baby steps to heal a broken heart. Whatever you do, have self respect and pride and do not call him, text him, e-mail him again. He has humilitated you with his response and that it. Enough is enought.

Losing a love is like a death and it's going to be necessary to experience the stages of the grief process, but your strong and I know you are going to be just fine.

There is a full life after a heart break and although it might not seem like it right now, there is a tomorrow and there is that one special guy just waiting for you, at the right time and it will happen naturally. Surround yourself with family, good friends a healthy environment. Take some quite time to just feel your sorrow, think and heal. Do things that you like. Go for long walks, exercise, go back to school...it's a great way to meet new guys. Invite friends out to eat or a movie. Keep active and when you feel like just crying, it' ok to cry, but DO NOT be tempted to contact him ever again. Just remember how he humiliated you and the only thing you have done wrong is to "Love". How bad is that, that all we really want to do is love.  You are going to be ok with time and one day at a time. Hang in there....Judy