Should I tell?

[Bonzai]

My long term bf and I have split up.  He has shown a great interest in bisexuality and stays stoned 24/7.  He wants to dress in women's clothing and be the submissive party.  He participates daily in the gay hook up hotline and the extent of his activities is unknown.    

I accept who he is and we are still friends.  However, I am seeking advice on a moral dilemma.  The problem is he now wants to date one of my friends who is exceptionally naive and trusting.  I know for a fact that he will not divulge his lifestyle and I feel an obligation to let her know what she's getting into.  I"m concerned for her emotional and physical well being but don't want to invade his privacy.  What would you do?

[RainLover71]

Yes your right,its criminal and he should have been charged.She had her whole life ahead of her and had a bright future,now she takes a cocktail of meds everyday for the rest of her life.

[Bonzai]

Thanks for the input.  You have confirmed my instincts.  The ex has been less than honest in the past and a slave to his sexual impulses. Knowing my friend, she won't be satisfied with vague statements so I'll let the cat out of the bag.  I'd rather protect her than him and if it ruins our friendship, so be it.

getitright - I'm sorry for your friend contracting aids.  I am astonished at the number of married/attached men who have casual flings with other men unbeknownst to their mates. It's almost criminal.  

[RainLover71]

Yes,you have to tell your friend out of a moral obligation.She has the right to know because it will allow her to make an informed decsion when it comes to a possible relationship,if in fact it ever comes down to that.One of my friends engaged in a relationship with a bisexual man and didn,t know what he was up to or infact that he was bisexual and she ended up with aids as a result.I know thats the extreme side of the spectrum but he should have been honest and he should never have placed her at risk.Food for thought.

[tiffany112680]

Yes tell your friend.  Maybe you could say it like "he has a different lifestyle than I had expected".  Or maybe suggest to her to be friends with him first to get to know him.

[Kayannaboo]

I would warn her but at the same time not revealing too much because u have loyalties to them both. Thats all I can tell you, I understand the extent of ur dilemma u dnt want to lose ties with any of them but I would advice u to follow ur heart. U know what is right!

[TTinKKerBBell]

Personally I would feel obligated to tell my friend.  Under the same circumstances were the tables  turned, I would want Her to tell me.  Do Unto Others.

Good Luck