Should i divorce my wife?

[kevin198612]

My wife and i have been married for 3 years, 6 months ago she told me something that rocked my core. the daughter i have been raising is not mine. she had an affair 2 years ago. the reason she cheated was that she was a virgin when we got married and she wanted to feel how another man felt like.....the affair lasted 2 months. i dont get it, i was a virgin aswell but you do not see me going around sleeping with other women.

i can tell she loves me and she has been apologetic many times, i do feel i will forgive her in time but i cant forget about it. she is a beautiful woman but i am failing to bring my self to make love to her...now she has started suspecting me of revenge cheating all because i stop to say hi to a female work mate.

i just need advise, if i was to cheat would it ease my pain, i feel like a beta male for accepting the child and staying with my wife. maybe sleeping with other women will make me feel like an Alfa male again.

[specialmom]

The daughter you've raised all this time IS your daughter.  Biology doesn't make a dad.  Your bond and love for her makes you her dad.  Your wife screwed up big time.  For real.  The question is if you can forgive her.  How motivated are you to keep your family together?  Do you love your wife?  Counseling can be helpful as well as a positive mindset if you want to make this work.  Sorry this whole thing happened but don't disown your daughter who believes you to be her daddy.  

[AnxiousNoMore]

I doubt if revenge will ever be satisfying for you, so I would focus on trying to figure if you want to be with her instead, since you have some decisions to make.
Depending on how she feels about abortion she had an option. The fact she kept her secret instead of discussing with you is important. How do you feel about being a step parent?
Where is this other guy and do you want him out of your lives and keep the secret from your daughter? Or does she plan to tell her daughter? If he is aware of the baby he might want custody.