baby daddy issues

[csvob9293]

OK I liked him and he kept saying we should date but I had to give him a few days.  Then I found out he was sleeping with me,  my cousin,  his ex,  and several other people.  I broke things off. Then he said if I was pregnant he couldn't afford child support so he was gonna push me down a flight of stairs.  Well I wasn't gonna tell him I was pregnant.  But my male cousin is his best friend so I had to tell him.  Then he denied it and said it wasn't his even though he was the one sleeping around. Now that my current boyfriend said he was gonna step up and help me,  now my bd wants involved.  My current boyfriend and I had plans to move to a different state for his work.  Would it  be wrong to move if he actually wants to try being there for the baby or just say **** it and better my life?

[specialmom]

I'm very sorry.  Break ups always really hurt but especially when a baby is in the picture.  give it some time to heal.  peace.

[csvob9293]

And bd is still gonna be in the babies life he and i had a talk today.  I'm just so depressed that theotherguy told me he wanted to be with me and help with thebaby but broke up with me bc of the baby

[csvob9293]

He did break up with me today bc I'm pregnant, that took a big 180.

[specialmom]

I didn't say you shouldn't move on with your life.  /You  should and need to.   But your child will want to know their father.  This is the sadness of having a child with someone you can't have a relationship with or the relationship wasn't committed before the pregnancy with a strong foundation.  kids want both parents to be a part of their lives.  And your child will be sad if it doesn't happen.  I know older children.  and it is sad when they don't at least 'know' the dad.  good luck

[csvob9293]

My amazing bf yall like just said I'm rushing his life and he needs to focus on school.  

[specialmom]

Hi there.  Well, it is sad.  It sounds like you have a good plan for a nice and peaceful life and I'm happy for that.  I'm glad you have your own home, car and etc. and a man that wants to be with you.  But it is hard because you are carrying this other man's child.  The truth is, you really can't just say 'forget it' to the baby's father.  Not because of him . . .  but because of your child.  Kids want to know their parents.  At around second grade or so, your child will be extremely hurt if both parents aren't in their life in some way.  Big picture, knowing dad is going to be important. And then you have less of a chance of this child growing up resentful and at the age of 13 or so saying "I'm leaving to go live with dad."  

This doesn't mean you shouldn't move.  Or that you have to share custody if he is an alcoholic (document these things).  but let him meet the baby.  let him have contact.  

My oldest son has a friend whose dad lives many states away and is a raging alcoholic.  He was clean a couple of summers and the boy went to stay with him for a month each summer.  Didn't get to go this past summer.  But he was here and had this phone and I overheard him showing my son that his dad calls all the time to talk to him.  Proudly.  

This boy has an AWESOME, involved step dad.  But kids kind of long to know the bio daddy.  So, make it possible while protecting your child.  good luck

[csvob9293]

Thank you everyone

[Nov7thmommy]

Oh no mama, move as far away as u can from that *******, I love the fact that u found a good man that's gonna provide for u and ur baby, so do it for ur baby and move on and good luck to u, just don't tell him where you're going

[BeyondUnique2]

No something's in life things & situations are temporary meaning God put people in your life when you least expect it. If the other guy is making a way for you and your unborn child & is their for you. Why not' besides you both deserve the best" you & your baby. You don't have time for a immature man & drama. Trust goes a long
way.I would take a walk on faith & move. The other guy will still be at the same place. Besides he can be a blessings or might be your husband..

[AlyssaBrookeJason]

Girl I would move with your new MAN and tell that other piece of **** that I had a miscarraige.

[AAVs_mommy]

... Red flags everywhere. Leave him alone girl.

[kthomp14]

I would get rid of him. It will do you loads of good in the future.

[nonishy]

Do what you think is best, if moving with your current boyfriend is best then go for it...If he wants to be the daddy of a baby that isn't his, then you have yourself a good man. You can't find many if those these days.

[haleyblossom]

Change your number and move away. He sounds like a toxic person

[lilpianogirl85]

In a normal situation I would say give the baby daddy a chance if he wants to be involved. But he has already threatened you and sounds very controlling and is an alcoholic on top of that. Bad situation to put a child in. I say move with your boyfriend to wherever before the baby is born. Keep any threatening texts or fb posts or whatever the baby daddy sends you cause you might need it if he tries to fight you in court later. But go find your happiness girl and big props to your current bf for stepping up he sounds like he would be a much better father figure for your child anyway. I would just stay away from the bd (change your number if he keeps trying to get you to cheat on your bf) until you take him to court for custody and child support after the baby is born.

[clairwin]

Please yourself.  He seems to be able to. Drop him like a hot stone and move on swiftly, you seem to have found love elsewhere and thats whats making the ex want you. Carry on with your plans and exclude him. Id move too before baby arrives, sure he wont bother himself to visit you. Good luck.

[Laflam09]

He just wants to be a part only bc he sees ur happy without him and he sees someone else is wanting to do his job that's all ... He wants to mess things up for u girl move on and forget his sorry a**

[bsconcerned]

Yeah its not that "he won't let you name your own child" that would only happen if you allowed it. You fill out the birth certificate and the name is what you say. You don't even have to let him in the room and I certainly wouldnt. Honestly if you planned on moving out of state you should. But if you wait until after the baby comes and he takes you to court it would be a fight to do so.

[LibraMum]

Totally agree with Mamabear3315. At the very least he would NOT be naming my child or in control of any decisions made about a child he's threatened to basically kill

[csvob9293]

And he slept around the whole time and he's trying to get me to cheat on my bf just to sleep with him.  Why would I mess up what I have with a good guy that's gonna take care of someone else's child. My bd just came to my job with my cousin he was/is banging ughhhh. she's 37 he's 26 and I'm 21 and my bf  is about to be 25

[OctoberBaby5]

Ahh reading posts like this get me so pissed, not you but about the guy being such an ignorant a**hole...okay one, furget him you name your baby whatever the heck you want, he does not own you and you are the one carrying the baby, and usually I dont like to tell girls this bc I dont really know anything behind yalls relationship but honestly the best thing for you to do is move on with your life, move with your boyfriend, and put the babys father on child support, im not saying take him away from his kid, you can allow him to come visit and I dont know skype or something with his kid but you cant just stay in the same city forever bc of him

[MamaBear3315]

Screw that, its your child, you're carrying the baby and YOU'RE the one that will fill out the birth certificate, so you name your baby what YOU want to name him/her! & screw your ex he sounds like a low life piece of s**** and doesn't deserve to be in your childs life. Your current boyfriend sounds amazing, and if I were you I'd move with him! :)

[csvob9293]

I have my own house and a good job and a car.  Baby daddy is an alcoholic who is about to lose his job and lives with his mom and has been in jail several times. If it ever went to court I'm sure I'd have a better chance.  My bf is going to school to get his welding certification. He didn't want kids till after he had a job. But he's so excited for the baby. My mom and I didn't think I could have kids and I was devastated when I found out I was pregnant by a man *****.  But I'm glad I have my bf for support,  ya  know

[stephannieluvv]

I'd move on girl!!