I recent my husband

[latkah]

My husband has ruined too many family celebrations with his substance abuse. I recent that he kisses up to my family. He is never emotionally there for me!. All his kind actions are really for his own benefit. He is never really thinking of the other people only what to say so he can set himself up. hE FOOLED ME AT FIRST!. i CAN'T EVEN LOOK AT HIM ANYMORE! i NEVER KNOW WHEN HE WILL FALL INTO ONE OF HIS SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROBLEMS. IT'S USUALLY WHEN i MOST NEED HIM!
nOW MY MOM DIED AND MU FATHER MOVED IN i AM STUCK WITH HIM BECAUSE OF MY FIANACIAL OBLIGATIONS. i DON'T KNOW HOW TO EVER FORGIVE HIM FOR HIS EMBARASSING BEHAVIOR BEFORE MY SON GOT MARRIED! HELP I AM SO ANGRY! hOW CAN I EVEN LIKE HIM AGAIN!
hE IS SUCH A PHONEY!

[dominosarah]

What sort of substances is he abusing??  I do know there are people on the substance abuse forum that are not addicts but have a loved one who is.  They have some really good advice.  You are not alone in this.  Come on over there and talk with us.    sara

[jo929]

you do not say how old you are or how long you have been married to this man, and it is never to late, just because you have oblgations, dont you think your dad sees what is going on? can you not go to work if you have relatives or sisters maybe they can keep dad, if not you can work and there are people  that can come out and cook for your dad whille you are at work, just look for your options, you will have some talk with a counsler or medicare worker at human rescources, you do not have to put up with it   luck  jo if you stay go to alouns or group therapy there are a lot out there that are in the same boat so to speak and you can help each other with support

[nessie12]

this sounds like my father...he would disappear for days at a time to go and "use" then it came to a point where he totaled a car and got another stolen...my brother and i were both out of the house and he left my mom,prob when she needed him the most for Chicago. i dont know how my mom or my brother deal with the anger...but i hate him i choose not to deal with him even if he is not acting out...and you know i think if asked he would blame the way a treat him as a part of why he goes and does whatever he does...i guess cause my mom forgives my brother will still humor him when hes acting right

i dont really have any advise other than you need to find what works...you can be like me,my mom, or my brother