My boyfriend of 1 1/2yrs just called me by his ex's name!

[msmoney]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. Just last night called me by his ex wife's name (no.. not in bed.. he would have a very black eye in that case!!). He did this a number of times in the begining of our relationship & I would point it out every time. This is the first time he's done it in a very long time. My concern is how long we have been together.... why out of the blue?? I told him how much this upset me & I was told not to read into it. He didn't even know he did it!! There's a feeling I get of him realating me to his ex. I told him this & he said that's not true.. that I'm alot better than his ex. Being if that is the case... why then is there no commitment from him. He stays over at my house alot & we seem to have a great realationship. When I try to ask him why he won't move in or give me some sort of plan or commitment, he last told me my house was to small for him to be able to move in. It feels like excuses to me. He will be 43 in a couple of weeks, I'm 35. I know what I want, could it be that he doesn't? Or maybe he does & it doesn't include me?? But I'm told over & over that he's not stringing me along. I'm not so sure.

[mayflowers]

I don't think him calling you by an ex's name is that bad.  I am really bad with names but I remember numbers, I love numbers, but names, they get mixed in my brain.  I've called people that I've known for years the wrong name and it means nothing except my brain doesn't process "words" that well.  Don't worry about it.  IMO, it really means nothing.

[Aloysia]

To be honest with you...I've been with my fiance for 4 years now and I've accidentally called him by my ex a couple of times....I have absolutely no feelings for my ex as a matter of fact he is a complete lowlife and I haven't seen or spoken to him in over 3 years....I did notice that the couple of times I did call him my ex's name was when we were fighting....because I always used to fight with my ex it was like a de ja vu....I never intentionally called him my ex's name it just came out....as for the commitment part, you both are well capable of living together...maybe there's something in his past that is keeping him from the commitment part or maybe he doesn't want to settle down and keep his options open....hope this helps!

[hldeskin]

Honestly, If my fiance called me by his ex wifes name he would be sleeping on the couch for weeks.  I think that feeling comes from self consciousness that almost all women have.  You don't want him comparing you to her because their relationship failed.  Him calling you by her name doesn't necessarly mean that you remind him of his ex.  It could just mean he had a brain fart.  And I wouldn't tie this together with him not wanting to move in...  chances are it has no connection.  Its hard sometimes, but sometimes you just have to think like a guy.  He messed up your name, to him its a dumb move but its not a relationship ending one.  He probably wants to forget and move on..  

[Stephanie112607]

me and my boyfriend have been dating 4 months now and hes proposed, but it depends on the person some people move slow and people moved really fast it depends, but that concerns me that he called you by his ex's name, if he keeps doing that then aparently he's talking to her some how.

[susieq87]

Everone thinks different but I feel a couple of months is long enough to know if you want to marry someone.  If this is one you want, stick by your guns.  You don't have to settle for less.  The truth may be painful but atleast it would be out in the open.

[SeriousSam]

Or maybe he was hurt before and wants to make absolutely sure that he knows what he was doing before he "commits"?

Don't make a big deal about the whole name thing.

[RockRose]

He may be stringing you along,  but I don't think it has any bearing on whether he calls you by his ex's name.  He does relate you to his ex - and your name is probably stored right next to his in his brain.

I call my oldest son my little brother's name,  and my current dog by old dogs names,  and we've ALL called our teachers "mom" in the past!  (How embarrassing that was!)  It means nothing.

But the fact that he is kind of unwilling to commit might mean a lot.

[jo929]

The writing on the wall so to speak is that he does not, and will not, make a commitment.
marriage. or otherwise,
He is getting what he wants free, i mean no offense, but when he gets ready he will move on, this has happened to so many people, also the more you ask, the faster he will run. are you sure he is not still with his ex, I have seen this happen also,
If you really want to know for sure, just say its marriage or nothin, and then you will know, whether to get on with your life or not. lots luck  jo.