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Oral Sex/Herpes2
About a week ago I gave and received oral sex with a girl. No straight sex. Then over the weekend, I gave her oral and had vaginal unprotected sex. She has sense told me she is positive for herpes 2 but has/had no outbreak, has not had one recently and takes daily Valtrex. I have recently scene a canker sore in my mouth on my check and another slightly irritated spot where there are small red dots. I am worried about both the possibility of contracting oral herpes (since I have kissed my kids since, I am divorced) and the possiblility of getting genital herpes which there are no signs of 4 days out. Help me understand my risks please.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
This information does not change my opinion or advice. Initial oral herpes does not usually cause just 1 or 2 sores in the mouth. I continue to believe it is unlikely you caught herpes and that your kids are not at risk of herpes.
All a distant online expert can do is provide general information and probabilities. I have done that. That the information isn't reassuring you isn't something I can help. Pleasee a personal health care provider. I won't have any more to say.
All a distant online expert can do is provide general information and probabilities. I have done that. That the information isn't reassuring you isn't something I can help. Pleasee a personal health care provider. I won't have any more to say.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Welcome to the forum. I'll try to help.
The chance you caught herpes is very low. First, the episode of unprotected vaginal sex carried a small risk, but quite low. For unprotected vaginal sex, the risk of transmission -- even if she wasn't taking Valtrex -- probably is in the range of once for every 1,000 exposures. Taking Valtrex reduces that by at least half, probably more. So now we're down to 1 chance in a few thousand. (In monogamous couples in which one person has genital HSV-2, not taking Valtrex, and having regular unprotected sex, transmission occurs in only about 1 in 20 couples every year -- showing how low the risk is for each individual sexual exposore.)
As for your oral exposure to her genital area: oral HSV-2 infections are quite uncommon, even in people who regularly perform oral sex on their HSV-2 infected partners. The mouth appears to not be highly susceptible to HSV-2. I don't know what to make of the "irritated spot" or "red dots" but it doesn't sound like herpes.
HSV-2 transmission in households simply does not occur (assuming no sex between the household members). Obviously if you develop symptoms that suggest herpes, either oral or genital, common sense says that you avoid direct contact of the infected body parts with your kids. And HSV is not transmitted by towels, eating utensils, by doorknobs, etc. There is no signficant risk here.
Most people would agree your partner should have informed you of her genital herpes before you had sex with her, but at least she did so afterward -- and she probably knows the transmission risk was low. You should not necessarily cut off your relationship with this partner, although that depends on whether or not it has promise for romance or commitment. There was a discussion about this in a recent thread; see http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/794650
Bottom line: Be on the lookout for either penile or oral blisters/sores, and if in doubt see a health care provider. But it is unlikely you were infected. Don't worry about your kids. And take an understanding approach with your partner, who might be as upset about this as you are.
I hope this helps. Best wishes-- HHH, MD
The chance you caught herpes is very low. First, the episode of unprotected vaginal sex carried a small risk, but quite low. For unprotected vaginal sex, the risk of transmission -- even if she wasn't taking Valtrex -- probably is in the range of once for every 1,000 exposures. Taking Valtrex reduces that by at least half, probably more. So now we're down to 1 chance in a few thousand. (In monogamous couples in which one person has genital HSV-2, not taking Valtrex, and having regular unprotected sex, transmission occurs in only about 1 in 20 couples every year -- showing how low the risk is for each individual sexual exposore.)
As for your oral exposure to her genital area: oral HSV-2 infections are quite uncommon, even in people who regularly perform oral sex on their HSV-2 infected partners. The mouth appears to not be highly susceptible to HSV-2. I don't know what to make of the "irritated spot" or "red dots" but it doesn't sound like herpes.
HSV-2 transmission in households simply does not occur (assuming no sex between the household members). Obviously if you develop symptoms that suggest herpes, either oral or genital, common sense says that you avoid direct contact of the infected body parts with your kids. And HSV is not transmitted by towels, eating utensils, by doorknobs, etc. There is no signficant risk here.
Most people would agree your partner should have informed you of her genital herpes before you had sex with her, but at least she did so afterward -- and she probably knows the transmission risk was low. You should not necessarily cut off your relationship with this partner, although that depends on whether or not it has promise for romance or commitment. There was a discussion about this in a recent thread; see http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/794650
Bottom line: Be on the lookout for either penile or oral blisters/sores, and if in doubt see a health care provider. But it is unlikely you were infected. Don't worry about your kids. And take an understanding approach with your partner, who might be as upset about this as you are.
I hope this helps. Best wishes-- HHH, MD
One last question if you would. The "canker sore" area in my mouth is like a few small white dots all together. Some redness and discomfort but no real pain. I am extremely upset and worried at sharing forks, pizza-- me and the kids all took bites of a few days before this started. I know there was saliva exchanged during this before I knew of my exposure and if so it would be an initial outbreak where virus is active. A. does this sound like oral herpes? B. Could the kids get anything from a small about of saliva if this is the case. Thank you
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
You're welcome. Thanks for the thanks.
Yes, you could get infected both orally and genitally -- but either outcome is unlikely and the chance of both is very remote. Don't worry about your kids. I doubt your testicular soreness is significant.
Yes, you could get infected both orally and genitally -- but either outcome is unlikely and the chance of both is very remote. Don't worry about your kids. I doubt your testicular soreness is significant.
That sounds great. I am worried about the kids because we have shared food and kissed (possible saliva exchange) and if it did transfer to the kids this would be a high virus time wouldn't it. I also seem to have sore testicles but I don't know if this is from my mind or not. Lastly, worst case scenario, could I get infected orally and gentially at the same time from her HSV2. Thank you so much!
You are reading content posted in the STDs Forum
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
