stupid drunk college girl

[dancingbanana]

I went to a party on October 8 where I ended up getting drunk and having unprotected sex with a guy I had only known for about a week (sounds familar, huh?).  I work with the guy so I still talk to him often but I don't know how to bring up the topic of HIV or STds.  Of course there was precum but he never actually ejaculated inside of me.  About three days later I came down with a cold, the usual, sneezing, stuffy nose and ears, post nasal drip, sore throat and productive cough.  My roommate and two other girls that I went to the party with all got sick as well.  After about three weeks I was still sick, off and on, especially in the morning (so was my roommate and the other girls).  I started getting a slight headache, I thought it was sinuses.  And one day I had a temp that never reached 101, but I had a pretty bad head ache. I decided to go back to the doctor because I thought I had a sinus infection, but I didn't.  Then on November 7th, now a month later, I woke up in the morning and I had a crust over my eye, like pink eye, but it wasn't really bad.  On the 8th I woke up with a really bad sore throat and by night time I was running a fever.  I still had the head ache, stuffy nose/ears, cough and post nasal drip, but now my lyph nodes are swollen too.  I went to the doctor again, just a virus.  My fever lasted about 3 days (gone now), and the head ache is off and on, but my throat is still very sore, stuffy nose, cough, post nasal drip, blah blah. I'm noticing now that my cough is bringing up some yellow stuff, and my eyes are still itchy and kind of pink.  

I've been checked for other STDs like chlamydia and gonorrhea, both came back negative.  I haven't noticed anything that could be herpes symptoms, although lots of people never have symptoms.  

For the past month I haven't really given myself a chance to recover.  I've been going to class, and going out to parties where I have been drinking every weekend.  I haven't been working out, and I've been eating poorly (I know, I'm a dietitian, or soon to be).  Usually I don't eat more than one meal a day, and then go out to eat for dinner.  Also, for the past month, as expected, I've been worried/stressing over any possible STDs.  After the fever I decided to go home, not go to classes, forget about homework for a while, NOT GO OUT AND DRINK, and just rest and try and get better.  But the stressing about STDs still hasn't stopped. I just keep thinking about the possibility and getting scared.  How would I tell my Mom?  What if I give it to someone else?

I'm sorry if I've wasted your time, and I know a lot of people have similar questions, but I'm scared.  Is this just a cold?  Or could this really be an acute HIV infection?  

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

As several others responded before me (below), your symptoms are typical for upper respiratory viral infections.  Conjunctivitis (pink-eye) in particular suggests a particular virus, called adenovirus--but you could have had more than one infection.  College students, parties, dorm life, close (often sexual) contact with people all are risk factors for those sorts of things.  Most important, none of your symptoms suggest herpes or HIV--and HIV in particular is rare in most student/university settings in the US.

I absolutely endorse the idea that you talk to your partner.  For all you know, he is losing sleep over the same anxieties.  But in the meantime, don't obsess over this; you can be confident you don't have HIV or anything else serious.

Good luck-  HHH, MD

[bluebird05]

You can be assured what you describe is not herpes.  Take care.

[t1234]

Why not just share your concerns with the guy.  I'll  bet
he'll be happy to get tested and share the results with you.

No need to be embarrassed.  You're just being responsible.

[yoy]

Stop worrying- ONe thing the docotr will tell you is that if a person says they think that anxiety is causing the symptoms they are most likely right-
YOu were tested for Gon. and Chla. both neg- so that should give you some comfort-
YOu have not noticed anything that sounds like an STD- your other symptoms are common and could be related to any number of things like a common cold-having the symptoms you describe after sex is not determintive of cause and effect
You could get tested for HIV and herpes- If you tested for herepes- and positive it may or may not be from this event- depends on your history-but I would bet neg anyway
HIV first the guy would need to have it for you to have it-if he did not ejaculate that would reduce the risk-but it would be unclear to what degree(again assuming he has it) a test at 6 weeks would be a good time to do it such tests are, according to the doc- reliable-and your symptoms are not reliable indicators for HIV-
The doc here may say you don't even need testing, but if it will let you get on with life then you should do it.  Also, many recommned that are sexually active(more than one partner) get tested once a year for STD's rather than after every episode of sex-
Also, assuming you tested positive for something and you needed to tell your mom(which it is unclear why she would need to know) you would tell her like any other illness or injury.  A person who has an STD is not a bad person, they have an, in most case curable, illness.  Bad decision, maybe- bad person no.  My experience also is that parents love and accept their kids regardless of the bad news.  Just remember the story of the prodigal son- good luck-

[dancingbanana]

Thanks, and I definitely do carry around condoms now.  I'm trying not to dwell, but I'm sure you know, it's not that easy. It's almost been 6 weeks, so I'm gonna get tested. Thanks again for commneting.

[Needinput]

Hey I just wanted to share with you I am also a college student (male) and the same thing happened with me. I started feeling very sick and lethargic weeks after an episode of unprotected sex. I'M TELLING YOU JUST TALK TO THE PARTNER ABOUT IT, it will make life so much easiar. And don't skip class and just sit in the dorms on weekends, I did that and dwelled on this thing for so long I am now so far behind in my classes. Just talk to the guy about it and then get yourself tested after 6 weeks. I got tested at 7 and 9 weeks both negative, even though the doc here says those test times are around 100% reliable my college doc wants me to come in for final 12 week test. Most likely you should be fine, the odds are GREATLY in your favor. I'd hate to see someone dwell and be depressed about this like I was.... I really hope the best for you and from now on (just like me) always carry condoms. GOOD LUCK!