Husband not interested

[mleerey]

Any suggestions for the following problems?: I have been married for three years. My husband and I only have intercourse about once or twice a month. I used to think I was sex obsessed until I got so frustrated I went looking for help. I realized that it is not really that normal to have sex with your spouse that infrequently. I do everything that I can to get him aroused. I try and dress in sexy clothes, then I put on sexy underwear and skimpy Jammies, and even try and do my makeup before bed and put on perfume that he likes. Even if I literally sit on top of him naked he doesn't get aroused. It is really starting to take a toll on my self image. I have started dressing up and wearing eye-catching outfits on my errands so I can get some type of attention. I have asked him to see a doctor but he doesn't take it seriously and he says I'm obsessed. But seriously in the last two months we have had sex twice for less than a total of 10 minutes. When he finishes he says I'm sorry and that he promises we will go again later so I should get ready. So I spend the rest of the day "getting in the mood" by bed time he won't even touch me and then rolls over and goes to sleep. Help please. It is at the point I  having fantasies about having my husband want me. It is getting really hard. I am currently looking for a marriage counselor.

[NOHARD]

Hi M, As Annie has said alcohol is a sex killer, so is stress, anxiety, to little sleep, high cholesterol, diabetes, meds, anger, middle aged spread, self image, low libido, low testosterone and his general health, all the above are sex killers.
Could also be his work stacking up on him, but still think you as a couple are a sexual mismatch.
Good Luck

[mleerey]

Things are getting worse. He also smokes a lot. He is not into porn. He actually is really conservative in that way. Although it is a bit worse we really have never been intimate more than twice in a week. Except on our honeymoon and even then it was only three or four times in the week. I don't even expect to be intimate in that way all the time but even just long kisses and cuddling would be fine if we did that  once a day or even every other day I would be happy.

[AnnieBrooke]

You said in another post that your husband is an alcoholic.  This would kill his desire, for sure.  Has it always been this way or has it gotten worse?

[NOHARD]

Hi M, So sorry for what is happening, seems your a sexual mismatch, You have tried you best to arouse him, its his needs are lower than yours.
And I'le be honest and say I dont think counseling will help him, what your getting now will never change.
So you have ways that you can satisfy yourself, perhaps if he sees yopu doing that it may turn him on, either using a dildo or massaging your self to orgasm, if you need help with these try googling dodson and ross, you will find all the info you need for both and more, its a very good site lots of help.
Dr Betty Dodson, she takes life one orgasm at a time.
See how you get on.
Good Luck

[headinjury957]

you did not state the age of your husband?does he drink,is he active,does he watch porn when you"re not around does he go to the bathroom often last resort put on your sexy undies in front of him along with a sexy skirt and white blouse with stockings that require a garter belt and a pair of f...me pumps and go to borders book store,take a evening class but leave him with the mystery of another man looking at you the way you look sexy when you leave the house,i guarantee u he will take notice if u act as tho u have something important other than trying to please his sick d...a..