Aa
To Young?
hi well i'm 15 and this is going to sound crazy ; and i've realised i'm going to get alot of critisizing responses but here i go..
i'm 15 years old currently completing year 10, i suffer from graves disease, i have bow legs, a bit of scoliosis and bunyens. and well ive been with my boyfriend for 5 months and i know it's something real because not many peopel like me because they think my legs are retarted, well what i'm trying to say is i really want a baby and so does my boyfriend, we've had unprotected sex and that's why now i am on the pill. i think i would be able to raise a baby as i have alot of family supporting me tho they are not my parents because they kicked me out because they cant cope with my disease, but anyways i live with my brother & sister-inlaw who's only 23 buht has 4 kids under the age of 6, and i'm always baby sitting and everyday i'm contributing to raising them. i make bottles ; change nappies ; bathe ; give them medicine ; spend money on them and even take them places, so i'm pretty much already doing the job of a mother. i get money from centrelink which equals $460 a fortnight and my boyfriend earns $100 a week buht will increase when he works with my dad. & i might be studying from home as school life for me is unbearable & also my boyfriend is completing year 10 does work experience 2 days a week and is soon doing an apprenticeship. so what i'm trying to say is ; is it stupid that i want a baby so young ? any personal experiences ?
i'm 15 years old currently completing year 10, i suffer from graves disease, i have bow legs, a bit of scoliosis and bunyens. and well ive been with my boyfriend for 5 months and i know it's something real because not many peopel like me because they think my legs are retarted, well what i'm trying to say is i really want a baby and so does my boyfriend, we've had unprotected sex and that's why now i am on the pill. i think i would be able to raise a baby as i have alot of family supporting me tho they are not my parents because they kicked me out because they cant cope with my disease, but anyways i live with my brother & sister-inlaw who's only 23 buht has 4 kids under the age of 6, and i'm always baby sitting and everyday i'm contributing to raising them. i make bottles ; change nappies ; bathe ; give them medicine ; spend money on them and even take them places, so i'm pretty much already doing the job of a mother. i get money from centrelink which equals $460 a fortnight and my boyfriend earns $100 a week buht will increase when he works with my dad. & i might be studying from home as school life for me is unbearable & also my boyfriend is completing year 10 does work experience 2 days a week and is soon doing an apprenticeship. so what i'm trying to say is ; is it stupid that i want a baby so young ? any personal experiences ?
I have to agree with the other ladies. Baby sitting is NOTHING like being a parent. I was 16 when I had my first son. It hit me when he was in the basinet crying and NO ONE came to pick him up while I was trying to take a nap. My boyfriend wasn't around. He didnt have to handle the baby the way I did. He is now my husband and we have a beautiful family but it was hell-o getting to this point in our lives. Please re-think your decision and think of how much better things will be if you have a good job and stability behind you to raise a baby.
` Dear All ; yeah i've thought about it, and i understand where you's are coming from, it's just hard not to want one being part of a big family and taking care of my 23 nephews and neices. And well you may not think teen relationships can last but most of my brothers and sisters have been with there partners since thye were 15 and its now between 7-10 years theyve been together so i have hope :D and i know its something more than puppy love because of well my bow legs boys don't like me in that way and he's been the only guy who has stuck around (:
idunno why i just feel the urge youno ? but thats why i put myself on the pill so it won't happen. Thankyou all for you advice & positive critisism (:
idunno why i just feel the urge youno ? but thats why i put myself on the pill so it won't happen. Thankyou all for you advice & positive critisism (:
I guess I'll be the only one to say you are crazy to want a child at 15. Yes, being a mother is wonderful and kids are great, but at 15 it's not something you should be trying for. You've been struggling with depression and a new diagnosis, now is definitely not the time to be thinking about starting a family, especially with a bf you have not been with for long. I don't have the same medical condition as you, but have my own that I must deal with and it's difficult at times. Though I would urge you to continue school and do all you can for yourself. Go to counseling, have good communication with your bf and friends, work hard in school, and try to enjoy parts of life. You have so much ahead of you to experience and it will be exciting to go to college and have that experience. A baby won't make life better or make you happy. A baby will only magnify the problems you already have, making life much more difficult. Plus, as Clysta said, statistically teen relationships don't last. You may prove that wrong, but only time can tell for that. There is no need to rush through your life to try to grow up fast. Enjoy what you have now and plan for your future.
First, no you're not crazy. Many young girls want children--it's a matter of how ready they are.
Now. I'm sorry, but what you've described does NOT make you a mother. Babysitting, making bottles, changing diapers is run of the mill stuff anyone can do. It makes much more to do this, and once you have a baby your life changes and gets 100x harder.
The other questions that would need to be answered are---What will your bills be when you live alone. $460 is a decent amount when you're not paying for gas, car/house insurance, diapers, formula, food, gas, electricity, water, and all the other essentials to life. My husband makes a decent amount monthly and we can pay the bare essentials with nothing to spare on "fun". Would you still stay with your family? Would they even let you?
You've also been with your partner for 5 months. And you're 15. You can say it's real, but I've read many hundreds of stories from ladies in your exact situation and when that guys realizes his life is over, he's more likely to run than stay. Maybe he is the one, but it's not often a teenage relationship lasts. You're more statistically likely to become a struggling teenage mother. The reasons for this are a screaming baby, lack of sleep, lack of money... even couples that have been together for years upon years have problems. How do you think you would do with someone you've barely been with. You have years to have children. Why throw your childhood away? At 15, like it or not you ARE still a child. Enjoy it. Once it's gone it's something you will never get back----This is coming from someone who didn't have a childhood. Don't take that for granted that you have one.
I'm not trying to be rude, I'm being realistic and it's hard to be a parent.
Now. I'm sorry, but what you've described does NOT make you a mother. Babysitting, making bottles, changing diapers is run of the mill stuff anyone can do. It makes much more to do this, and once you have a baby your life changes and gets 100x harder.
The other questions that would need to be answered are---What will your bills be when you live alone. $460 is a decent amount when you're not paying for gas, car/house insurance, diapers, formula, food, gas, electricity, water, and all the other essentials to life. My husband makes a decent amount monthly and we can pay the bare essentials with nothing to spare on "fun". Would you still stay with your family? Would they even let you?
You've also been with your partner for 5 months. And you're 15. You can say it's real, but I've read many hundreds of stories from ladies in your exact situation and when that guys realizes his life is over, he's more likely to run than stay. Maybe he is the one, but it's not often a teenage relationship lasts. You're more statistically likely to become a struggling teenage mother. The reasons for this are a screaming baby, lack of sleep, lack of money... even couples that have been together for years upon years have problems. How do you think you would do with someone you've barely been with. You have years to have children. Why throw your childhood away? At 15, like it or not you ARE still a child. Enjoy it. Once it's gone it's something you will never get back----This is coming from someone who didn't have a childhood. Don't take that for granted that you have one.
I'm not trying to be rude, I'm being realistic and it's hard to be a parent.
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BUT (you knew it was coming lol) regardless of experience looking after children, being a parent is not easy and while centrelink may be paying you, it is not an appropriate income to raise a child on.
You'd obviously need to buy everything for a baby prior to the birth... So, pram, cot, clothing, bottles, nappies, changetable, bath, blankets, lotions, carseat etc and even secondhand, those items are not cheap.
Also, while you may be living with family at the moment, with a baby you would need your own house at some point. Obviously that would require you to save bond, first months rent etc and then purchase furniture for the place.
Of course, then baby comes and you have only centrelink and a small income from your boyfriend to pay rent, groceries, nappies, clothes for a growing baby, medication when needed, bills etc.
My husband and I had our first child when we were only recieving benefits and the ONLY reason that we managed was because we already had our own house, furniture, everything or our baby and our own car.
But, we did struggle at times. If someone chooses to struggle themselves, thats their own choice, but a child shouldn't pay for that decision. Struggling also puts pressure on parents, and if you add a screaming baby to that (and it will happen at some point), things can get VERY messy.
If you really are set on it, I would suggest you look into getting your own house, furniture etc. Set yourself up in a home and prove that you and your boyfriend can handle THAT responsibilty before committing to a child.
If in a year, you have your own house, are still with your partner and are paying your bills etc without struggling then think about it again.
At the end of the day, we can all tell you not to or that you are too young or not responsible enough, that being a parent is hard etc but only YOU can make the decision at the end of the day.
Good luck :)