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Pregnant and not happy
I've just found out this morning tha I'm pregnant and my initial reaction was to burst in to tears and horror. I do not want another baby. I have a 3 year old and my DD has just turned 1. I am content with my life as it is. i've told my DH, and while I thought he would "tell" me I'm having the baby, he considered my feelings and we'll be talking about it tonight.
I'm about 6 weeks? What happens with a termination? Am I still at the stage where they give me a pill to take?
I'm about 6 weeks? What happens with a termination? Am I still at the stage where they give me a pill to take?
I'm not thinking that you are careless at all.
I want you to be aware of something though in case a doc doesn't tell you. I know someone who had an abortion, and believe me after that she has struggled with depression everyday. Don't do it because you are worried about depression while pregnant and afterward, because there can be more depression associated with abortion.
I am confused you said DH which usually means divorced husband, but yet you said you are thinking about your husband and marriage?
Your right about the birth control pill, because there are women that get pregnant on it, and maybe you will help many of the teens on here that believe as long as they are on the pill, that they won't get pregnant. That is just not true. Many women are part of the 1% that get pregnant on the pill. Believe me when I was pregnant I talked to alot of them in the OB office. Plus many women don't take into account that if they are over weight that their chances even rise.
After our second child was born, we knew that we couldn't afford anymore children at that time so a week later my husband went in to have a vasectomy so that accidents didn't happen. I'm not trying to tell you what do to, but the best thing to prevent this is if you or your husband go get something fixed.
If you do this, and it is your decision, please get some counseling afterward, and maybe even before because it is very hard on a woman, and make sure that nothing gets discussed around your children so at they don't have to deal with it. I am sure that you wouldn't do that anyways.
I don't believe that anyone has the right to force their beliefs on anyone, I just believe that someone should know of different alternatives just in case.
I want you to be aware of something though in case a doc doesn't tell you. I know someone who had an abortion, and believe me after that she has struggled with depression everyday. Don't do it because you are worried about depression while pregnant and afterward, because there can be more depression associated with abortion.
I am confused you said DH which usually means divorced husband, but yet you said you are thinking about your husband and marriage?
Your right about the birth control pill, because there are women that get pregnant on it, and maybe you will help many of the teens on here that believe as long as they are on the pill, that they won't get pregnant. That is just not true. Many women are part of the 1% that get pregnant on the pill. Believe me when I was pregnant I talked to alot of them in the OB office. Plus many women don't take into account that if they are over weight that their chances even rise.
After our second child was born, we knew that we couldn't afford anymore children at that time so a week later my husband went in to have a vasectomy so that accidents didn't happen. I'm not trying to tell you what do to, but the best thing to prevent this is if you or your husband go get something fixed.
If you do this, and it is your decision, please get some counseling afterward, and maybe even before because it is very hard on a woman, and make sure that nothing gets discussed around your children so at they don't have to deal with it. I am sure that you wouldn't do that anyways.
I don't believe that anyone has the right to force their beliefs on anyone, I just believe that someone should know of different alternatives just in case.
Hi there.
I had an abortion at 8 weeks about 3 years ago. It was not a nice experience and I wouldnt wish it on anyone. You must really be sure what you're doing and really talk through every possible issue and think of how you'll feel looking back on your decision in the future. My experience has stuck with me and always will.
However it is all pretty straight forward it usually goes like this: your doctor refers you onto a clinic to speak to a specialist. At this stage they take a sample of blood and talk through with you the procedure and go through with you your reasons for the choice you are making to ensure you are sure of what you are doing. They do the blood test just to ensure everything is in working order and there are no complications. They will then refer you on to your nearest abortion clinic and you book in at a date and time to suit you. Once at the clinic you are taken in and an ultra sound is performed to check all is still in working order. After that you are taken off, get changed and given 2 pills to insert inside yourself which softens the wombs and cervix. You are given a choice of local or geneal anesethetic but i really do not think you want to be semi concious for this and advise you are put fully to asleep. They then perform the procedure and within the same day you are sent home. You are advised to return for a check up with your GP 2 weeks after to ensure everything is ok.
Hun, it was the most traumatic experience i've ever been through and i think about it every day. Its the easy choice to make but the hardest to live with but if things just arent right for you then i wish you luck. Make sure you have friends and family to support you before and after.
I hope things work out for you.
I had an abortion at 8 weeks about 3 years ago. It was not a nice experience and I wouldnt wish it on anyone. You must really be sure what you're doing and really talk through every possible issue and think of how you'll feel looking back on your decision in the future. My experience has stuck with me and always will.
However it is all pretty straight forward it usually goes like this: your doctor refers you onto a clinic to speak to a specialist. At this stage they take a sample of blood and talk through with you the procedure and go through with you your reasons for the choice you are making to ensure you are sure of what you are doing. They do the blood test just to ensure everything is in working order and there are no complications. They will then refer you on to your nearest abortion clinic and you book in at a date and time to suit you. Once at the clinic you are taken in and an ultra sound is performed to check all is still in working order. After that you are taken off, get changed and given 2 pills to insert inside yourself which softens the wombs and cervix. You are given a choice of local or geneal anesethetic but i really do not think you want to be semi concious for this and advise you are put fully to asleep. They then perform the procedure and within the same day you are sent home. You are advised to return for a check up with your GP 2 weeks after to ensure everything is ok.
Hun, it was the most traumatic experience i've ever been through and i think about it every day. Its the easy choice to make but the hardest to live with but if things just arent right for you then i wish you luck. Make sure you have friends and family to support you before and after.
I hope things work out for you.
Thank you Laura, and I can see your POV, but another reason for not wanting it is not just the baby after. I don't have very good pregnancies and afterwards I get SEVERE PND. I am very careful and I am on the pill, and have not missed one, but as they say it only works 99% of the time. I have thought if I could have a baby and give it up for adoption, and I honestly do not think I could.
And I know that I seem very selfish here, but this is by all means not an easy decision and I have thought of nothing else even before I took the test. And this is a decision that would affect not only me, but my whole family and my marriage. My DH struggled very hard with me with my last pregnancy and depression, which was worse than my first pregnancy, and I don't know if he could go through it again. So please do not think that I am a careless person who is taking the easy way out, because I'm not. I am also thinking of my husband, my health, my marriage and my children.
And I know that I seem very selfish here, but this is by all means not an easy decision and I have thought of nothing else even before I took the test. And this is a decision that would affect not only me, but my whole family and my marriage. My DH struggled very hard with me with my last pregnancy and depression, which was worse than my first pregnancy, and I don't know if he could go through it again. So please do not think that I am a careless person who is taking the easy way out, because I'm not. I am also thinking of my husband, my health, my marriage and my children.
I wanted to add that there is even some women on this forum that have been trying and trying to have a baby with no success so there are women out there. Their stories sometimes break my heart because they want a child soooooooooo bad and it's just not happening for whatever reason.
Again I am not trying to decide for you, just letting you know that there are other options.
If you do decide to abort, then please please have your tubes tied so this doesn't happen again.
Again I am not trying to decide for you, just letting you know that there are other options.
If you do decide to abort, then please please have your tubes tied so this doesn't happen again.
Um I don't know as that isn't something I like. You know there are females in this world that can't have children and would love to have a child. Have you considered adoption? My sister-in-law and her husband couldn't have children, but they found a woman that had two children and didn't want another, so she did the most loving thing. She gave her son to a secure home with loving parents. If you truly do not want this child, which I am assuming that you don't since you are talking about aborting the baby, look into adoption. You can be in control of where he or she goes, and the adopted family will pay any medical costs. Please think about this.
All I can tell you about a six week is when I was six weeks we saw the baby's heart beating on the internal ultra sound.
I will let you in on my story. With my first little girl, my husband and I had just gotten married three months before. The doc put me on predizone and didn't tell me it messed up the pill. I was upset at first because we weren't planning on having children for a couple of years. I got over that though. My little girl is now 5 years old and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Which you may be very serious about not wanting the baby, but please consider doing the best thing for the baby and the best thing for parents who can't have children and make their dreams come true.
I have two children.
Going from one child to two is harder then going from two to three children.
All I can tell you about a six week is when I was six weeks we saw the baby's heart beating on the internal ultra sound.
I will let you in on my story. With my first little girl, my husband and I had just gotten married three months before. The doc put me on predizone and didn't tell me it messed up the pill. I was upset at first because we weren't planning on having children for a couple of years. I got over that though. My little girl is now 5 years old and she is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Which you may be very serious about not wanting the baby, but please consider doing the best thing for the baby and the best thing for parents who can't have children and make their dreams come true.
I have two children.
Going from one child to two is harder then going from two to three children.
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