My 4yr old: Is it him or is it me :(

[dmichelle26]

Hello, I have a 4 year old son who is the middle child of a 8 yr old older bro and a 7wk younger bro. I have really noticed since my youngest son was born how misbehaved he is. He currently has a speech development that was diagnosed by a speech therapist and is a bit delayed. He currently is in an early childhood development program offered by our public school. But as he is getting ready to turn 4 next month his behavior has increasingly gotten worse. He isnt violent (except when he is playing with his older bro) but if told to do something he doesnt do it unless you are standing right over him telling him over and over again. He is an extremely active little boy and I am not sure if it is because now he isnt the youngest or that he doesnt get enough outside activity that is bringing on this behavioral issue. When I was a young girl I was diagnosed with ADD and put on a half a pill of Ritlan ( my parents slowly wheened me off) and I am hoping that this isnt the case with him. Can anyone give me some advice I feel so lost, I feel like I am a bad parent. In reading other post it does say to follow through which I can honestly say that I dont do most of the times because I am so busy (my husband is in the air force and is gone) and I dont want to take him to a dr to get evaluated and diagnosed with ADD/ADHD because I have poor parenting skills.

[Sandman2]

  So far it does sound like pretty normal 4 year old stuff testing boundaries.  Thing to keep in mind is that immediate timeouts are really effective and fairly easy to do.  Consistency is important - so just pick one or two things and work on that.  Once that behavior is changed, go to work on another one.
  If the ADHD thing bothers you, a great book is "The ADD/ ADHD Answer book," by Susan Ashley.   Good luck

[ibtryin]

it+sounds+like+he+is+a+normal+4+year+old+who+is+testing+his+boundys+just+stick+with+your+guns+consistancy+is+key+and+its+hard+for+a+child+to+transition+from+being+the+baby+to+the+big+brother+wake+sure+he+gets+some+time+just+you+and+him+hope+this+helps+best+of+luck

[allmymarbles]

It is awfully tough to bring up three young children alone. Try to get some time off if you can. Maybe you have a helpful sister or aunt who can pitch hit for you. You will see things much more clearly if you are sometimes removed from the situation.

[compnet]

Just my two bits.  Does it seem at all like it could be jealousy of the 7week old or missing Dad?  You should try to work on that to see, otherwise it looks like evaluation for ADD or parenting help.