Playing with poop

[cincin812]

My daughter is 8 years old. She's adopted, but I've had her since 2 years of age.  She has always had behaviour problems, and now takes medication for ADD.  She does strange things all of the time, and I'm at my witts end.  Her latest thing is she plays with her poop, or does something with it, and then wipes the excess on her bed.  Her biological mother is bi-polar, her biological father has been diagnosed with schizophrenia, bi-polar, and manic depressive.  Are these things that she could inherit.  She also struggles in school, she has a hard time reading because she can't remember words.  She is very smart, but does very strange things. She's constantly going into the bathroom and staying, even at school.  She pours the soap out of the bottles and refills them with water. She hides candy and eats it in her bed, basically she puts anything in her mouth she can. Help me if you can, I'm going crazy. I have 5 other children, boys, 4 of whom are adopted, and none do these kinds of things.  Her behaviour is so off the wall, we can't leave her with anyone.
thanks.

[Sandman2]

     I don't know about your spoken English, but your written English is very good.
     Anxiety and depression are very common co-disorders for people with ADHD or ADD.   If you need any information on these disorders, please let me know.
    This link may help you figure out which type you might have.
             http://www.help4adhd.org/en/about/what

[f0rs]

Oh how embarrassing.. I just got a flashback from when I was 5 years old. (I'm 23 now). I used to stay in the bathroom a LOT. And I placed toilet paper in a cross on the floor, and pooped on it. Then I would study it, before I flushed it in the toilet.. I also used to pee on/in my toys.. I would also experiment on different ways to urinate. I would place toilet paper in my pants, making a "diaper" and pee in it. I would take a toilet paper core, place it on my urinary opening, and pee standing like a man. I would do this outdoors too.

A relative explained to me that when I was still in diapers, maybe 1-2 years old, I would smear my poop on the wall beside my bed.. I would also play with the soap in the sink for hours, looking at myself in the mirror, (also placing a small mirror on the floor and looking at my genitals), I also would shower for way too long, it felt so comfortable.

I was obsessed with candy, and would to anything to get some. I talked a lot to myself, out loud, and I was most happy playing alone in my room with dolls, stuffed animals and sticks looking like animals, making conversations between them. (I started doing that when I was 3, and switched to talking to myself in my head when I was about 7 or 8.) I daydreamed a LOT, and never felt comfortable around my classmates. I remember only drawing and doodling, having conversations with myself and looking out the window in class. I didn't smear poop in the bathroom at school, but I stayed in there way too long, and I wet toilet paper with water, throwing it up in the roof and walls in the bathroom. The teacher had to come get me out of there all the time.

I was alone a lot when I was a baby and a young girl. My mother met my father on a night out, they had sex, and she got pregnant. It was a one night stand. My mother didn't realize she was pregnant before she was 5 months on the way, and she had to keep me. She was always out drinking when I was born, and when I was a toddler, and when I was a very young girl. She kept partying and bringing men home. I had multiple babysitters and a couple of young familymembers to take care of me.. My babysitters where between 12 and 17 years old when I was 4-6 years old. I think they were too young to take care of me.

I often refused to go to school or ballet class, starting to cry and feeling very confused and angry.. I was very good at drawing, making things out of cley and painting. I could read and write well, but didn't exactly do well at anything else.. I got teased and bullied a lot. I had my first suicide thoughts when I was 9. I told my mom, but she just started to cry and slapped my face.

I had my first anxiety attack when I was 11. And I didn't know what it was or what to do, I thought I was going to die, so I called 911. I was home alone, as usual. I almost jumped out from the window, two stories down, I was so scared.. I stood on the balcony, screaming on the top of my lungs after help.. The door was locked, so I couldn't get out..

I didn't do well in school, and I continued to get bullied and teased, througout all 10 years in school. I told the teachers, and I told my mom. Nothing changed. I had no father or familymembers to talk to, and my mother didn't take me seriously. I didn't know what mental health was, I had no idea such a thing existed. The bullying stopped when I was 15 and started in highschool (or is it called college?), but I didn't finish the first year, I didn't manage it.. Since then, I have tried 6 times to finish highschool/college, but I have failed every time. I've had many jobs in between the attempts, but only for a short period of time. I've also lived in many different apartments, but failed to pay the rent and became very unpopular with the landlords, wich is understandable..

I moved out from my mother and her boyfriends apartment when I was 17, after nagging her about wanting to have a place of my own (I did NOT get along with my mothers boyfriend, he did and said very mean things to me..) Things went more downhill from there, I got terrorized by my mother and him. I tried to explain to my mother that something was wrong with me, but she just got really mad at me for saying that. I started to just lay in bed, not taking care of myself. Not eating properly, not showering, not seeing friends, sleeping too much, not sleeping at all.. Not washing my clothes or cleaning up my apartment.. I only went to the toilet to poo, and I peed in whatever I could, to not have to go "all the way" to the toilet. I developed an eating disorder and became very thin. I started therapy, but my mother made me think there was nothing wrong, and that I just had to get myself together! I started to party a lot, and sleep with a lot of guys too.

I have been very depressed for a long time, and I still have weird toilet habits.. On my last job, the toilet was placed on the other side of the mall (I worked in a shop), and I would pee in a cup and poo in a plastic bag in the attic of the shop, and then throw it in the garbage and poor the pee in the sink. When I was alone, of course. One time I forgot the poobag and the peecup up there, and my boss found it.. We didn't talk about it, and I was so incredably embarassed.. I was constantly having panic about forgetting if I had done the same thing at home or at my job, I'm, terrified my boyfriend will find something like that here at home.. And it feels like I'm not the one doing it, my mind is totally blanc, and I just do it on autopilot.. It scares me, because I have no idea if I have done it or not, and I'm terrified to forget about it so others can see it..

I quit my job, and became more depressed. I smoked weed for the first time a year ago, and I finally realized all this. It wasn't the weed that made me this way, it only pushed it to the surface.. I'm now currently on a waitinglist to get help from a psychologist, and testing for ADD and/or ADHD.. I think I have ADHD, anxiety and serious depression and maybe dysthymia. Sorry for my bad english, it's not my native tongue..

[Sandman2]

   Problem with ADHD kids is that they don't think about pooping until its too late.  And then its too late.  They need regular times on the toilet.  Doesn't matter if they poop or not.   Hopefully, you have noticed some consistency of time when the mistakes happen.   Start them on the toilet 2 hours before and an hour afterward.  Don't make a huge deal of it.  Just ask them to try.  If nothing happens thats ok.  But be very consistent.
    Now, I am assuming that the child poops at home and is not SID or highly constipated.  That would, of course, change things.

[Firefly1704]

I work in school with a 3 year old child with adhd that will not poop on the toilet any strategies or help would be most welcome please

[inquirymind]

Is there a behavioral center, mental health clinic, psychiatrist or counselor that she could see in your area?   I had many problems with my son and any of those places would be a great place to start!  Your Family Practice Physician or Pediatrician may even give a referral.  I truly believe that seeking counseling will benefit her and help your entire family!  They know how to get to the bottom of what is really bothering her and help YOU to help her through it all!  I pray you find the help she needs!

[zeggon]

everyone that has problems with thier adhd children, i am a 21 year old male with adhd, i have neen off my meds aince i was 8 and i too have had problems similiar to those of your children, i played in my poop until i was in high school, i can tell you that after a while it's like an addiction i legitamatly had withdrawls much as a meth addict would, and i have been tested as a grnius, however i have problems intaking info, i have to do more than one thing at a time, that may possibly help with your children, and as far as lying goes, try to understand that it actually is part of the condition, abd that you need to keep telling them when they are caught in a lie, it lets them know that they cannot get away with it,