a joke, gave me a laugh

[rush2112]

A hooded armed robber bursts into the Bank of Italy and forces the tellers
to load a sack full of cash.
On his way out the door with the loot, one brave customer grabs the hood and
pulls it off, revealing the robber's face.

The robber shoots the guy dead without hesitation!

He then looks around the bank to see if anyone else has seen him. He sees
one of the tellers looking straight at him; the robber walks over and calmly
shoots him dead.

Everyone by now is very scared and looking down at the floor.

"Dida anyone elsa see a my face?" calls the robber.

There follows a tense minute of silence.

Then an elderly Italian gentleman, looking down, tentatively raises his hand
and says:


" I tinka my wife caught a glimpse. "

[Am2BerrySweet]

So...........................What happened to the Freshly Cut Fruit Salad??

Did the Prisoner (aka Steve) go to get it?  

[Happie1]

there was this olderly couple that lived in the country, in the town next to them was a big prison. One night they we listening to the radio. The news said that one of the dangerous prisoners had escaped and that everyone should lock thier doors. The old lady gets up to lock the doors and in comes the prisoner. He ties the couple to thier bed and starts rubbing up on the old lady and wispering in her ear. The prisoner gets up and goes in the other room. The old man says to his wife, Honey just do whatever he wants i seen him whipering to you and you might have to take one for the team. The old lady looks at he husband and says the prisoner was telling me that he is gay and is going to do things to you that you can't amagin. so honey lt looks like your going to have to take one for the team.

[cleaninitup]

nice lol

[Bubulous]

Rush, Newbie, and kmo are trapped on a deserted island.  They have been there for several years and barely could scrape enough to live.  One day while walking along the shore, kmo tripped over a bottle.  She picked it up to wipe the sand off of it and a genie popped out.  The genie said “I will grant you three wishes or all three of you one wish.”  After discussing it, kmo decided to split her wishes three ways, the genie told her after the three wishes he would disappear and never come back.  She let Newbie go first…..
“What would you like”, said the genie.
Newbie replies “I have been poor for so long I want to be in New York with a billion dollars.”  The genie grants his wish.  Next was Rush…
“What would you like”, said the genie.
Rush said “I have been lonely so long I want to be in California surrounded by beautiful women.”  The genie grants his wish.
The genie then looked at kmo and asked what she would choose to wish for.
She said “Well I don’t know right now, give me a minute.”
After about an hour she looked up at the sky and said “I wish my friends Rush and Newbie were here, they could help me decide…..


All I can think of that isn't dirty.

I will leave this here as well.

[cleaninitup]

The other day me and the kids are in the grocery store check out line-dash-and a nice older women was in front of us.She was chatting with us and really interacting with the kids and just being really friendly.So she finishes bagging and off she goes waving goodbye and saying she will see us later.OK crazy broad.lol  so get mine all rung up and bagging them when the cashier gives me the total of over $400! We get alot but not nearly that much.So ask the cashier how could that be?She says "Your mother said you were paying for her groceries also." What?? 'That wasn't my mother!!! So I just leave the kids and go running out after her,see her on other side of parking lot and go running for her.She is just shutting the door so I just grabbed for what I could, which ended up being her leg,so here I am standing in the parking lot pulling on her leg,just like I am pulling yours. Lame but cute,hope it made you smile H