1 year clean

[ang_811]

Today is such and emotional day for me. Since midnight last night I've been n tears and then into laughing n bn happy within minutes. Alot of u know my story. 2 years ago today I lost my step daddy Doug. At th. time he was the only one in my family who knew about my disease. He was n recovery also for years. He took that secrete of mine to the grave with him. I believe he had alot to do with my getting sober when I did.

One year ago after making plans of skipping town to get so numb that I couldn't even feel that day, I woke up n a different mind set and a different outlook on life. Something changed inside of me. Instead of skipping town I went to a meeting and picked up my 24 hr chip. The journey started then.

   Thru doing a search on the Internet on how to get off methadone, I stumbled upon this site. I met alot of amazing people here. U all were there for me thru good times and bad times. Thru all my relapses no one gave up on me. Here is where I learned what aftercare was. I got a counselor in addiction who drilled it n my head that I needed meetings. From going to meetings is where I learned there was another way of life. Thru all if that is how i am here with one year sober. All of this came to me by stumbling onto this site. This site saved my life.

If I sat here and told yas that this past year has been peaches and cream I'd b lying to u. I lost my cousin who was tragically killed when I was 4 months sober. A few months later I lost a good friend to this disease. Not once did I think about picking up. But no matter what happens today, if I lay down at night with my head in the pillow sober than to me it was a good day.

We can get thru anything clean n sober. We just have to b willing. I was trying to cover up the pain with alcohol and drugs but what i did instead was intensify the pain 30 times more.

It all starts with being honest. Honest with yourself and honest to others. I lived a lie for so many years. Even when I started to get sober 2 years ago. That guilt and shame from lying to myself and others is what always sent me back out.

I don't regret anything from my past. If it wasn't for that I wouldn't b here today with my heart full of love, gratitude, and compassion. My past is y I'm changing into the person I'm becoming today.

I'm a grateful addict/alcholic n recovery.

Today.. We have a choice to pick up. Today and only for today I choose not to. Don't know what tomorrow holds and it doesn't matter bc all I have is today. If ur depressed its bc ur living n yesterday. If ur anxious it's bc ur living n tomorrow. Just live n today.

Happy 2 year angelversary Doug. This one year is for u. But don get to excited bc it's mostly mine. :)

Stronger than yesterday.

[Pat1956100]

Wow Angie
What a great accomplishment and it really hit home.  Thanks so much for sharing.  You did make me cry though.

[laurel453]

So proud of you, Angie !!!!!!!!!!!! :)

[gnarly_1]

HI Angie .....great job ....I always new you could do this im so proud of you just keep going to meetings and contue to work on your recovery it will pay of in dimonds your friend Mark

[clean_in_ks]

YEAH 365 DAYS.....a WHOLE YEAR!!!!  What an inspiration you ARE!!
Thank you for showing us the way.......sharing in your joy~

[YesLife4Me]

Chiming into to also give yoj a congrats on your achievement.  Sounds like you had an awesome support through your step daddy and you have made hime proud staying the course.  Good job!   Keep it up and keep giving good advice and support here.  :)

[Nursey7]

Thanks for sharing!  This was very inspirational; it gives me hope bring back on day 4 that I can do this. I am so proud of you; only another addict truly knows what an achievement this is. Keep up the good work. God is awesome :-)

[atthebeach]

Happy anniversary to you Angie. One year,365 days clean and sober. I am so happy for you and very proud. Keep your head high you Worked hard to get where you are today.
Do something nice for yourself. Doug is smiling down on you.
You are getting stronger each day, your roots are growing deeper.
Continued blessings,
Hugs,
Debbie

[selfinduced]

Great post....Congrats on your year clean. Very cool!

[ang_811]

U sure ya wanna play the honesty game with me addict? :P

[Fireby29]

So awesome.  Congrats on one year!

Bryan

[OpenMind24hours]

Clean and serene for an entire year!! Congratulations!

[addict3]

Hey! Congrats to you youngster!
I'm doing backflips here!

This really makes my day As sara said, Keep that Guard up!

And while you are gettting honest here, you may as well admit those Steelers are not all that good anymore! LOL

I'm proud of you!

[Sweetness91]

Congrats on your clean time!! I can't wait to say I have a year. That must feel amazing!! You go!!

[VICourageous]

WOW Great Job. I have been on here since dec. I too was on the ride with methedone for over 12 yrs plus others.Your post was such a BLESSING. I have a bd this month too...6 months. You are sooo right about all the after care and it sounds like you were able to handle the life situations that came upon you....You really made my day........Why don't you post more??
God Bless You
vickie

[ang_811]

Sarah...omg I will never forget those spats.u made me so mad at times. But, I know I really upset u at times. Thank for being there thru everything with me. U were n my thoughts today as i kept hearing u saying just b yourself


Ty everyone for the Congrats

[ricart70]

awesome!!

[Clarityrocks]

Great post, thank you for sharing with us! I agree with everything you said. Congratulations on 1 year, that is amazing!

[dominosarah]

What an incredible,amazing,fantastic,wonderful,awesome achievement little one.  You have no idea how proud of you i am~love and hugs

Yes i copied and pasted what i wrote on your status!

You and i have been thru he!! and back, he!! and back AND he!! and back(IBK will understand that too!) We battled hard and nasty a few times but you always came back.  I knew at some point it would stick and it finally did.  Today you celebrate a year of sobriety.  I wish i could be there to share in your celebration.  Always remember to keep your Guard Up and remember to focus on the journey, not the destination~

[hope4good]

Congrats on 1 year!!! That is awesome!! You give me hope that it can be done.

[toothfairie]

that's awesome!  congrats on 1 year clean!  amazing!  great post

[nursegirl6572]

That is just amazing!!!  365 days!  I mean, super incredible...especially as much as you've gone through.  Those tough challenges really test a person, and you did great!

Do something kind for yourself!  Congrats!

[Dane74]

So stinking proud of you!! I have learned so much from all my failed attempts and I consider myself very lucky that I had the opportunity to get my $h1t together and turn my life around. Your so right about feeling worse with drinking and drugging our sorrows away, it was ten times worse, the depression was so dark and scary, so glad you woke up and turned ur life around!!! Keep up the great work..,