I feel bad b/c I haven't been around here much over the past week. But I wanted to check in and let my friends here know that I'm doing pretty well. I had a busy week but it felt good to be able to handle it. I have 37 days now and feel so good about that. I could not have done that without all of the support I received here. Thank you all for that.
I want to let those of you who are struggling know that there is hope and it will get better. Everything you are struggling with now - all of the cold sweats, nausea, sleeplessness, lack of energy, anxiety - all of the symptoms of withdrawal - will be worth it one day soon. I know that sounds crazy and maybe impossible to you now, but it's true and I am living proof of that.
I have been struggling at work so much over the past couple of years - first b/c of the hydro (though I didn't realize that was the problem at the time) and then b/c of coming off of it and the lack of energy and physical/mental withdrawals. This week, for the first time in two years, I was so productive at work. It felt so good! I can honestly say that I was able to fully concentrate on doing my job and my mind was so clear and focused. I know that the quality of my work is so much better now and I am so glad that I suffered through all of the withdrawals to get to this point.
So, hang in there. Keep fighting b/c it is well worth it. I wouldn't trade this feeling for anything in the world and I know I wouldn't have it if I hadn't gone through everything to get here. Keep posting and reach out for help when you need it. There are great people here who have so much wisdom and experience. That is what got me to this point and it will help you too.