Need HELP

[James750]

Hello all. This is the first time I ever posted on a site like this or even talked about this problem to anyone, but I am desperate. I am an addict. those of you you who know, know what this means.Its not additicion to any one thing, Its being an addict. My choice for the time being is pain relievers I take about 160mg+ of oxy a day.When its not avalible morphine vicadin perc's or whatever i can get my hands on to get by. I kicked a years of alcholism by switching to coke, i kicked a 2 year coke habit by switching to oxy's. i am know 4 years into this and i am a slave to it. I am a single father of 2 wonderfull son's who are my life, i have have a well paying job( need it to support my habit) and to tell the truth life was going great nobody, other then my handfull of dealers knew i was always high. about a year ago i met the woman of my dreams, i don't mean to sound like a hopless romantic but after many failed relationships and an ugly divorce i had give up on ever finding anybody. Them i met this person and she is the greatest person i hav ever known, my best freind my soulmate my lover and next to my children the most important thing in my life. Anyway after hiding my addiction for awhile she finally figred it out. well she put up with this for awhile but she began to see i was in love with the drugs more then anybody else, and she is right. well she had enuff and left me . Not a breakup she said, but i had to quit the drugs or she coulnd't be with me. I honestly beleve it hurt her more than me, she is so caring. Well i tried to quit, the first week was hell my house fell apart i couldn't go to work my kids knew something was wrong and i was in pain, i looked like **** felt even worse. So i went back i'll just be carefull only a little to get by, hold thinga together, Right know i snornet 60mg of oxy and ate 2 percs about a half an hour ago. I need to quit. this woman means so much to me if  i lost her i don't beleve i could ever love again. not just that for my own health and for my kids. if anybody can help or just some words of stenghth i could really use it.

[MIBunny55]

Hello James and Welcome to this forum!!  I myself had been using about the same as you, wasn't the money we spent outrageous?? My main suggestion for you is to stop snorting it and use it as if a doctor prescribed, don't know of any legitimate reason to crush a pill to snort. When I read your post that statement jumped out at me -- stop as much of the using behaviors as you can.  I began on Suboxone on 12/26/07,  for several weeks I was on 3 - 8mg tablets daily. Got to 2 - 8mg per day, cple weeks later was down to 1 and 1/2 daily, now I am almost down to 1 tab taken in 2 doses (halfs).  I feel fortunate so far as I don't hide it from my husband or family or loved ones and it is legal and covered on my health plan.  I have read a few posts and depending on variables - results are good and not too good.  Still, no more hiding no more outrageous behavior and no more money.  Personally I am active as I can be with AA and NA cuz it works for me.  I will probably post what I am going through with the suboxone detox. I firmly believe it will be safer than methadone (went through that stuff like 3 times, ugh.  And when all else fails I hit my knees and pray for strength and guidance to get me through.

[flmagi]

Welcome to the forum.  Sounds like you have a long ongoing problem with addictions and may be a perfect candidate for Suboxone. It really could save your life and buy you time to get the help you need to work thru some of your issues with addiction. You can go to Suboxne.com and read more about it and find a doctor near you. Any questions you have, I will be more than happy to answer. Just send me a PM.
You can have the woman of your dreams. Life can be good again. There is hope.

[mimi1313]

Hi James,

You made a good decision in wanting to stop. That's the first step. There are a few ways. You can try to taper your dose by maybe one pill per week or you could just quit cold turkey and feel like **** for a week. You caould alos try suboxone. There are a few people here on it and it has worked well for them. You should private message flmagi or allaboutmary. They are both wonderful and very knowledgeable.

Good luck

[raventwo]

i applaud you for wanting to kick this demon out of your life! the scariest part is the unknown, which you now know! you did the ct thing, what about tapering down? alot of people on here taper, but some say that, if they have it they take it, so tapering isn't helpful, but maybe it could be a possibility for you! what about a dr? could you go see one, just to help you to get off of this, w/out having to suffer the w/d's to bad? how old are your sons? My hubby has gone ct off of major amounts of oxy! atleast 7, 80mgs a day, snorting as well. and when that was out, the morphine, the roxy's, etc....but he did it, it was hell as you know, but he did it. he is now 35 or so days clean-but now we believe he is w/d from to much xanax, which in itself is a whole other issue! if he hadnt taken so much of that, we feel by this day- he would be feeling alot better. unfortuantely thats not his case- but he will never go back ever! so, we are here for you- you are strong, and you have so many reasons to quit it!! your boys, the love of your life, you can do this! stay on here for support, the people here are wonderful, and they are all very knowledgeable!! (sp?)  In the end, you will find you are stronger than you think! Keep your head & chin up AND KNOW, YOU CAN DO THIS!!! GOOD LUCK AND KEEP POSTING!!! :) Much love  XXXOOO

[CleanUpTime]

Hang in there. Maybe you can try tapering or C/T; either way will be difficult, but it seems like you will need to do one of them to save your relationship. Don't let these drugs ruin your life.

Many of us, myself included, have found a way to kick the habbit. You also have a loving person by your side for support which is VERY important.

I just told people I had the flu and everyone bought it when I was going through WDs.

You can do it. Read the posts here and be strong. It's going to be tough, no doubt, but once you tell yourself you're ready, you will be able to get through it.

Keep posting, we'll help ya get through it.

[reviewer]

Admitting you have a problem is a big step and saying you want to stop is another.  Read some of the posts here and see what others are doing to quit their addiction.. Look at the Thomas Recipe as well.  If you have stopped other things you can stop this as well.  Finding the key to what makes you take pills to begin with will help you as well.
Hang in there, there is alot of support on here and it does help.