Opinions on chances...

[mk1964]

This is what...the third time I've come off Vicodin and once lasted 14 days. All of us here have taken all kinds of amounts. My worst was 9-10 a day. I thought (again) I was gonna die with the cramps, muscle pain, etc last week. I'm still not there but better. I did take Ultram, which as I've read some people have been told by docs it's "different" then Vicodin, non-addicting. I have some left(50mg, 4-6 a day prescrip). Yeah it helps by the side affects(especially dry mouth and constipation) make it not worth it.

Anyway, I don't want to "classify" habits but I need to know for my own mind from all you who truly know, I've C/T the 9-10 and am on day 4. Some minor aches, but what I really notice is the pain I was put on it for in the first place that has been gone since I've been taking this. But where do I stand on the list in major to minor addiction/dependence....and I know what it is like up to 14 days, but what after that that? I still have bad mood swings and depression from doing this it seems as well...will that also go away?

Guess I'm just looking for things to come and where I am at compared to others. I see people taking 30 a day...I can't imagine what you're going through. Should I switch to Utram eventualy when I feel better from all this?
Please respond!

[mk1964]

each of you had something to say that hit the nail on the head. To clear confusion, I haven't started the Ultram. The Doc wants me too because he believes it will be "less" harmful addiction wise. Obviously, he has not visited here. And I know from the last time I did 14 days, it WAS in fact the cravings that sent me back. And I know exactly what: I felt better, got the craving, said to myself I know how to handle this now, started with 2, 4 then 6,7,8,9,10. My way of dealing with it may or may not be different. It's anger. I get mad at the drug when it tries to drag me back. Yes, it's powerful. I will admit, AA is tough RIGHT NOW for me to look at. I've never been to an AA, just AAA. I feel like this site gives so much support, spending an hour here feels like a paid therapy session.
I have a business trip for 2 weeks out of state coming up. I did this for a weekend and it worked during that 14 day span....I don't have any more scripts of Vicodin to re-new, and I ain't taking any with me. So I may crave away, but I know it will be a 2 week test I need to go through. Y'all wish me luck, it starts Friday. Thank you guys so much. I'll still be here, trust me. Need my wife first, but you run a close second.

[avisg]

My first concern here is the ultram its just as addicting as the hydro and the WDs when coming off it are worse its my DOC  .I have WD off other narcotics as well.I would suggest you STOP taking it now.
You have relapsed many times its time to do something different this time look into recovery care .The pain will seem worse for a while but then it will get better right now your body wants its drugs so it screaming at you Life is so much better clean it just takes a while to get there .Hang in there better days are coming.

[enufisenuf]

Your chances are as good as you want them to be...or as you know them to be.  I had a similar habit of 2 1/2 years, going from 1 or 2 a day to 7 or 8 over a 2 or 3 month period, stopping for a week or so, and starting over...but each time I stopped, I really did not want to, just did not like the # I was taking. Always thinking I could control it the next time. The last time I stopped I knew it was different and that I was going to stop for good. Finally came to the realization that a. could not control intake, b. always need more and more, c. just not a sustainable situation. I am at 112 days and really feel very good now...even better than before I started.   You can and will stop, you will know. I have back and neck pain to deal with, but it is much better to deal with that with an otherwise healthy body and mind, than not.

[corey411]

Congratulations on day 4 and your strong determination to keep trying. I don't have any experience with ultram but from reading many posts, you will get as addicted to it as opiates. It is a synthetic poiate and states on the instructions that it should not be taken by anyone with a history of opiate dependence. Avisg is one of our community leaders and this was her DOC so I'm sure she will be on to tell you her personal battle with it.

I was on Hydros 10-12 a day for over 7 years. I can't count the number of relapses I've had. I am closing in on 6 months this time and it has been the longest for me. I don't think that there is a common schedule for time spent feeling better. Everyone is so different and alot depends on things like your support system, your attitude....the more positive your outlook on life the easier you should have it. A person taking 5 pills a day for 1 year can have a harder time than someone who has taken 20 for 2 years. Alot also depends on how ready you are to quit. It does take some time to get our emotions, anxiety and overall feeling of wellness back. Statisticll the chances of staying clean go up after 6 months so time is definatly a factor. Those months go slow and although you do begin to feel better, you get hit with bad days and craving filled days. Time goes slow. That's why having a support system, esp. at first is so important. NA/AA is free and I thought I could never go myself but found much comfort and obtained much knowledge there.You can go to speaker meetings and learn alot about your addiction. There is alot to learn about it and it helps keep you clean. Addiction is pretty much the same as far as the mental part goes whether you are on 6 pills or 30. Some drugs produce worse cravings like cocaine and heroin but the fight is still the same.  

Antidepressants helped me. Also physical exercise, read the thomas recipe under health pages, also PAWS will help you understand what to expect.  Think of the next few months as waves coming periodicly and just brace yourself and gather strength to break through them when they come. If I can be of any help feel free to send a PM. God bless, Corey

[road2recovery]

congrats on day 4....I don't know where you stand with major or minor addiction...I will just tell you about my experience....I was up to 20, 10mg a day or lortab...I was addicted terribly....Lies, buying them off the streets, etc....Becoming someone that i hated...My detox was something i never want to do again, BUT I relealized that going through that, was really the easy part...The hard part , was the mental , and staying clean...I was the first one to say that I could stay clean as long as i could get through the w/d;'s, well i quickly realized i was WRONG...I saw an counsouler, specializing in addiction...That helped tremdously...But today what helps me the most is my AA meetings..I know for me that is the only way...

Also, my mood swings were terrible, but worst while at the end of my using...the pills no longer did anything for me except take the sickness away...They robbed me of the energy i kept taking them for...They robbed me of way to much money ...the robbed me of my apperance, and health..Looking back, the way i reacted to situations while using, was much worst then the way i react not using...Once the fog is gone, you see what you dont' want to be again...Also, I would taper off the ultrams as they are just as bad...Although i ws never addicted to ultrams, many here, have had a terrible time with them, and i would hate to see you on day 4, and have to go through this again..
God bless and good luck
r2r