Methadone Clinic Question

Question

Does anyone know if youve been gone from a clinic for about a month and a half if you can return at the same level you were at or do you have to start going everyday again, i was going twice a week, when i quit i made it 9 days with the help of pain pills then ran out and found methadone, i cannot control my intake like i could at the clinic, i was taking 6mgs per day after tapering down and thought i could jump, anyway now im taking like 20-40mgs everyday or every other day, when i take 40 i feel guilty and force myself to go a day or two without, i started out just taking 10mgs per day for about 2 weeks then i said what the hell ill try 20, really stupid move on my part i felt so good so much energy and that only lasted about a week, now i can take 40 and still feel like cr*p, i so hate methadone and pain pills!!!!

EvolverU · Accepted Answer

Don't be discouraged. It took me 30 yrs. to get off heroin & methadone. Self-recrimination and the belief that I was a "lifer" stopped me. Fear/stress/apathy self-loathing. I recognize the feeling of darkness on your home page. I was so like that - still am some times - but it changes. I'm telling you I was miserable & I was super - dark and cynical. I worked in the Alt. music scene in NYC, Edinburgh & Boston and that didn't help. So, no matter how frustrating it may seem, try not to beat yourself up. Remember, the only way to change something like this is to start by changing the way you perceive yourself and the world. If you keep walking down the same street, you'll always fall into the same hole - you'll always get the same result...thinking any other way is madness (a paraphrase of an Einstein quote.) There are things you can do to make this transformation happen both spiritually & physically..If you're interested message me & we can talk about it. In the meantime, you do what you need to do. Next time you want to step off - there's an easier way to do it and you have to plan ahead. It's never a cake walk but you CAN do this - you just don't believe it yet..have patience with yourself. Hold fast --I'm with you...

VICourageous · Answer

IF YOU CAN TAPER from methedone??? I myself would not go on the subs if you taper off the dones. I was just saying if you can not get off the dones go to the subs right now. Like I said in above post I can not even believe I am saying this but I have read alot of success here. WE both 
say to taper from what u r using. If u can not then go straight to that.
We talk about the merry-go-round Right? Why waste the time from one to another...I just think and it my experience that u might be better going to 
to the subs now???
WOW my views have changed if I only knew for myself back then. thanks for this site.
Hang in you will make a right move..
vickie

EvolverU · Answer

Right back at you. Whether you feel like a "raw wound" or not I'm here & I totally get it..
                       Your friend -

blotout · Answer

thanx evolver i truelly am blind walking through a mine field by myself and need guidance to stop from destroying myself, i try to be positive, stress gets to me and makes me down, im a tool/slipknot/staind/disturbed fan so im a little darker than most anyway lol, thanx again for your support!!!

blotout · Answer

thanx vickie, i might try subs once i get the methadone taper done maybe depends on how i feel, im hoping that with all the things ive learned on here, vitamins supplements etc that when i take that last dose of 1 mg i will make it without more opiates hope hope hope, thank you all so much!!!

VICourageous · Answer

Hi my friend...I was wondering were you have been. Evolver has gots some good info. New on this post but even is helping me...I did not go to clinic, but I  know how hard it is to taper our selves. I was way up too, then went to 30mgs stayed there for a long time. Then when I got to 15mgs and added the other so I can make it last it was a dead in street. I went back to 30mg again and yes running a 1-2 weeks short. It was a meery-go- round trying to find more..So as you know I went c/t from 30mgs because I was going up the latter again. I got some help and just did it. They wanted to put me on the subs, but I am so set in my ways I did not want to go there...But now that I read this post I am changing my way of thinking a bit.
I just shared this at a meeting I usually do not go to caled " living in times of illness" I think that was what it was called. Anyway I CAN NOT even believe I am going to say this but, maybe it would not be a bad idea to check out the subs. As we know we both can not control the methedone. You should know who did the methedone and went to subs you have been here longer then me. He told me to tell people they can PM him anytime..I will be keeping in touch with you more. Hang in you really really are trying sooooo darn hard.
Your friend vickie

blotout · Answer

well evolver once i starting buying methadone off the street i started only taking 10mgs a day and that lasted about 2 weeks before i started taking more and more, if i couldnt make if off 6mgs i know i cant do it off 30 or 40mgs, so i think it would be best if i go back to the clinic and maybe start back at like 20 or 30 mgs and go down 1 mg per week until i reach 0mg, i totally screwed up and i cant taper myself i am truelly an addict and enjoy the feeling i get from taking more although i know im making trying to come clean that much worse, i really need to get back in the program get conseling and help, i cant do this alone i know now for sure, thank you all for the replies, i probably need to start the clinic back even if i do have to go everyday, maybe if i have to do that ill taper a little faster cause i hate going everyday, we will see, i will keep you all posted, thanx again for all your support, i really really want to be making those XX clean day posts, i see so many everyday and feel so discouraged that i cant stay clean for more than 4 days :/

EvolverU · Answer

Hey,
       Another idea is to go to an ER to get dosed. I know they do it in some cities. 
                               Best of luck

EvolverU · Answer

Which state are you in? When I left my clinic on Dec. 25th they sent me a letter on Jan. 9th stating that I would have to meet with the Dr. for readmission. Basically, if you miss for fourteen days - you have to see the doc. at least in Mass. After that you reapply. It used to be that if it was within six months - they jumped you over a waiting list but I'm not sure if that still applies. It might be different clinic to clinic, state to state or it might be Federal. Don't panic. They'll answer..are you sure you can't hang in there. I know it's rough..but those acute symptoms will start to subside around 7 days - maybe a little more. Whatever you do, keep coming back..
                        I'm here if you want to talk

ActingBrandNew · Answer

Thats what I was going to say...that it probably differs from clinic to clinic...but I dont know so much about them so I didnt. Calling sounds like a good idea.

blotout · Answer

thanx man i called the clinic and they keep transferring me until i got a voicemail for the nurses, i think they leave at noon, ill probably have to call on monday morning before ill know for sure, it is probably different from clinic to clinic id say im not sure

ActingBrandNew · Answer

Hey, I dont know the answer to your question but Im responding so I bump your thread up as I see its getting buried. Hope someone chimes in with some help. Hang in there.