You've made it almost 7 months, Max, and if I remember correctly, you had surgery on your ACL last month. And then you fell shortly after your knee surgery and broke a rib too, right? What did you decide to do post surgery as far as taking something for pain? You said you were prescribed 60 hydros and 20 tramadol. Did you take any of them?
Now that you are a month post surgery, do you still have the hydros and tramadol in your possession? The reason I ask is because your addict voice is rearing its ugly head....telling you ridiculous things like NEEDING to take a pain pill to remember WHY you are staying clean!?
If you need some help in remembering why.....go read your thread:
Call one of your clean friends; get rid of any pills you have; help another suffering addict. Those are ALL better ways to help you remember why don'tcha think?
I surely hope you recognize how "sick" that voice is that's talking to you.....and I'm so glad you came on hear to share with us.