Need support

[Sharon0255]

I am going to try on go cold turkey again tomorrow using a variation of the Thomas recipe and I'm scared and alone   I am on 50 to 60 mg of oxycodone and can't take one more minute of this hell I did this a month ago and made it 8 days and went back please I really need support. I have taken Monday off and my husband is home and not working right now so I'm going to say it's the flu. I am so disappointed in myself. I was sober for a long time and was diagnosed with breast cancer in 09 had a total mastectomy and chemotherapy and here I am I have come off these at least ten times in 2 hrs and everyone in my family is in recovery and I've been able to hide this. The worst part is my youngest son just came clean with his habit and here I am lying this is killing me. My son has 28 days. I'm crying as I write this praying someone responds I'm in rough shape. I have enough pills and see the Dr on Tuesday. If I don't do it now I have 2 weeks off from work in December and I could do it then but I'm afraid something really bad is right around the corner I've been reading these boards for a month the last time I detoxed all these posts helped so much but because I have not joined the community I had no encouragement last time I detoxed. My question is can someone please support me through this I don't feel strong like I did last time. I took high doses of Valium and it wasn't that bad but my habit was less and I stabilized for awhile at 40 mg. Sorry I'm going on and on it's thanksgiving and I'm cooking for my family and feel like a piece of crap.

[laurel453]

hey, you are not doing anything wrong, don't worry about responses... there are times that the forum goes slow.... I know it is hard but fill your mind with positive thoughts .... your mind is playing games and getting you to use again, it is a lie, you don't need the pills, Sharon.. Forget about december being a better time, you will find then that it is not a right time and better wait till the end of January, this is how our minds play with us and our addiction to keep us on using....

as for how much to take.... start following the indications of each stuff.... if you are very upset with your stomach, wait for a bit before taking the vitamins complex ... i didn't have any problem with the mineral supplements but the vitamins sometimes upset the stomach....

[Sharon0255]

Feeling week and looking for some encouragement. Am I doing something wrong when I post I'm not getting any responses. Struggling with day one waiting for someone to pick up my pills really fighting the urge take some Oh God please help me I'm on my needs praying for help please don't let me take one..

[jlannaa]

You can do this , you might not believe me now but you are stronger than you think, i begged for gods help and he has given me fifty days so keep praying if your able take a bubble bath it helps so much i'm thinking of you

[Sharon0255]

Thanks for checking on me Gnarly

[gnarly_1]

HI  Sharon ......YOU CAN DO THIS .....it ant no fun but if you do a few things it will help try to maintain a positive attitude wile doing this this is a win win you will feel better and you wont be chained to a pill bottle when its done
I tell everybody ....'''you just got to be ok without being ok for a wile'' this to shall pass....remember to force the fluids gatoraid is good it has electrolytes in it remember this is all temporary in a few days you willl feel better and dont under estimate a good hot soak it will releave most of the symptoms if you can get out and rent some movies your probablly not going to sleep for a few days it will give you something to do wile up  ....I found rolling up on the couch with some soft music playing with my eyes closed ws as close to sleep as I was going to get it at least gives you some form of rest and pray with all your herat Jesus heres those that call out his name at 3am he is all you got and all you need I will try to get back to you I work for the newspaper and havent slept since wen night so my batterys are low but I should be up till 6 AZ time hang in there and what ever you do dont give up....did I tell you you could do this......good luck may God be with you.......Gnarly  

[Sharon0255]

can't keep begging for support too painful day 1 and a minute seems like and hour. I will check back later and hope to finds some hope from someone here today.and maybe some answers to my question and those of you who have emailed me you saved me from using an hour ago. please i feel so alone I want to make it through the next four days and not take and oxycodone. God help me fing the determination and courage,