Aa
i want to be an oc
MAYBE IF I WAS OXY, THEN ID GET THE EFFIN RESPECT I DESERVE ALL THE TIME FROM BF! THINK ABOUT IT......HE'D BE EXCITED ALL THE TIME TO SEE ME, WANT TO BE AROUND ME ALL THE TIME, I COULD DEF GIVE HIM A FEELING THAT NO OTHER THING (OR PERSON) COULD...........HE WONT ARGUE WITH ME. HELL, IT COULD BE MY WAY ALL THE TIME.....HE WOULD HIDE ME FROM EVERYONE--SO ID BE SPECIAL. THINK OF ALL THE MONEY HE WOULD SPEND ON ME. AND IM SOOOO TINY. WOW! AND, ID HAVE THE ABILITY TO BREAK HIM AND HER UP! NOT TO MENTION, I WOULD HELP TOO. I MEAN, SNORT ME UP AND ALL THE PROBS HE WOULD FEEL WOULD BE GONE!
OK, SO I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH HIM. IM ON BREAK. CALLED HOME OT CHEKC ON SON. HE DID PILLS WHICH IM PISSED NOW. AND I CANT COMPLAIN BECAUSE I MADE A JOURNAL ENTRY SAYINGI WASNT. THO I MAY HAVE TO TAKE THAT BACK BECAUSE....I KNOW ME..........I CANT KEEP QUIET. WHEN I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY, I GOTTA SAY IT.
OH, IM SO IRRITATED RIGHT NOW. SO G D MAD SEE I AM EVEN SWEARING SAYING BAD THINGS I SHOULDNT. I MAD.
OK, SO I JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH HIM. IM ON BREAK. CALLED HOME OT CHEKC ON SON. HE DID PILLS WHICH IM PISSED NOW. AND I CANT COMPLAIN BECAUSE I MADE A JOURNAL ENTRY SAYINGI WASNT. THO I MAY HAVE TO TAKE THAT BACK BECAUSE....I KNOW ME..........I CANT KEEP QUIET. WHEN I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY, I GOTTA SAY IT.
OH, IM SO IRRITATED RIGHT NOW. SO G D MAD SEE I AM EVEN SWEARING SAYING BAD THINGS I SHOULDNT. I MAD.
That was an awesome post...an awesome outlook. (not making light of your situation at all...but that is something addicts should read to see how their family/spouses/loved ones feel)
I will keep you guys in my prayers and I hope he does get clean SOON!!
The following I found on some other website...but maybe it will help you.
What Addicts Do
My name's Jon. I'm an addict. And this is what addicts do. You cannot nor will not change my behavior. You cannot make me treat you better, let alone with any respect. All I care about, all I think about, is my needs and how to go about fulfilling them. You are a tool to me, something to use. When I say I love you I am lying through my teeth, because love is impossible for someone in active addiction. I wouldn't be using if I loved myself, and since I don't, I cannot love you.
My feelings are so pushed down and numbed by my drugs that I could be considered sociopathic. I have no empathy for you or anyone else. It doesn't faze me that I hurt you, leave you hungry, lie to you, cheat on you and steal from you.
My behavior cannot and will not change until i make a decision to stop using/drinking and then follow it up with a plan of action.
And until I make that decision, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Stop being surprised.
I am an addict. And that's what addicts do.
(again I found this on another website not sure who the author is)
I will keep you guys in my prayers and I hope he does get clean SOON!!
The following I found on some other website...but maybe it will help you.
What Addicts Do
My name's Jon. I'm an addict. And this is what addicts do. You cannot nor will not change my behavior. You cannot make me treat you better, let alone with any respect. All I care about, all I think about, is my needs and how to go about fulfilling them. You are a tool to me, something to use. When I say I love you I am lying through my teeth, because love is impossible for someone in active addiction. I wouldn't be using if I loved myself, and since I don't, I cannot love you.
My feelings are so pushed down and numbed by my drugs that I could be considered sociopathic. I have no empathy for you or anyone else. It doesn't faze me that I hurt you, leave you hungry, lie to you, cheat on you and steal from you.
My behavior cannot and will not change until i make a decision to stop using/drinking and then follow it up with a plan of action.
And until I make that decision, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Stop being surprised.
I am an addict. And that's what addicts do.
(again I found this on another website not sure who the author is)
He has got to want it for it to work. That is the bottom line. Pray without ceasing that God will open his eyes and he will want it for himself. Print up all the things those evil drugs do to him and leave it for him to see. Good luck and we are here for you.
He knows i love him. he knows all that. that is probably what is so annoying. i really feel like there is no where to go from here. like-he knows i love him....i show him it more than daily........he knows im supportive...be it wanting to get clean or needing pills......
Great I'm glad I could help. Just keep remembering that and do what it takes to help him. He has got to want to do it for himself. Addicted people beat themselves up enough so try and be supportive but not enabling. I'm sure alot of us here would have given anything to have someone enough to care as much as you do. Bless your heart it's in the right place!
Gods richests Blessings!
Gods richests Blessings!
Well i can see that you clearly do care and love this person or you would not be so upset. i think is important to let him know exactly as you feel, including the care and love ya part.
i've learned that much with my kids. you tell them stuff over and over again and you are wondering 'are they hearing me? are they listening?'
they do listen to us and keep our words inside there somewhere. sometimes it is awhile before they react to them or one day they will come to u and say 'now i know what you were talking about , you were right all along'
my kids are grown now and sometimes they have apologized for things way long ago only now discovering their wrong.
so keep the lines of communication going and when he is ready to reach out for help, he can come to you.
i've learned that much with my kids. you tell them stuff over and over again and you are wondering 'are they hearing me? are they listening?'
they do listen to us and keep our words inside there somewhere. sometimes it is awhile before they react to them or one day they will come to u and say 'now i know what you were talking about , you were right all along'
my kids are grown now and sometimes they have apologized for things way long ago only now discovering their wrong.
so keep the lines of communication going and when he is ready to reach out for help, he can come to you.
Hate the sin but love the sinner.
No one wants to be a druggie I can tell you.
You need to let him hit rock bottom and not enable him to be that way.
Sorry but he has to want it for himself.
I'm praying God will open his eyes like he did mine and He will turn to God and be saved.
Good luck and God Bless
No one wants to be a druggie I can tell you.
You need to let him hit rock bottom and not enable him to be that way.
Sorry but he has to want it for himself.
I'm praying God will open his eyes like he did mine and He will turn to God and be saved.
Good luck and God Bless
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