47 days clean, but losing it! please help!

[AmoreDiAmore]

I'm missing group, I have a fever, doctor said I have Pneumonia, I'm still clean, but I'm losing it. I'm thinking about getting high. cause i feel terrible and i'm missing group. I can't do anything cause I can barely breathe. What am I going to do? I'm so scared. I have 47 days, and i'm thinking well that's not that long, please help, someone! I can't lose it again. I'm so scared! I completely lost my excitement for it, my determination for it. I feel so weak. Please help me!

[LateAugust]

Hey sweetheart    you  have been  so strong and determined  in your battle for sobriety,   you  are my sunshine girl, it always makes me smile to read your notes and see how you are a kick *ss strong woman!     Don't lost those convictions now  sweetie.....  remember  the physical  w/d is the easy part,   but  it is your  mind  that will get you over the mental part of wanting to use,   your determination,  intelligence  that will keep you clean and tomorrow is a new day....

I am so sorry you are not feeling well,  I think that causes a lot of us to be a bit more vulnerable than when our health is strong.    This has not been an easy week for me,  and you know what........  I wished I could have used just to escape for a few days that were so hard...........  but I didn't    cuz I know life ***** at times    it does    but  that does not give me a pass to check out on all that depend on me.........  (okay you got me on this one,  I don't use  but that doesn't mean that sometimes  everyone wants to check out or mitigate their pain, and I do know that sounds incredibly selfish  hence  me  saying yes  I do get that part,  even if I can't understand addiction completely)

I am worried about you sweetie     after seeing this I read your notes we have shared,   I hope you will do the same,  an affirmation of what a strong woman you are.........   Please let me know how you are...... physically  and mentally  and  druggability  (yes I made that word up, did it make you smile a bit?)

I will look for you tomorrow.......   and please know I am praying for you (in my own way)  and sending my best thoughts and concern to you sweetie.

[Bird43]

I really feel your desperation. If you can, in your mind fast forward the events if you did decide to use, the scoring, the excitement and guilt of getting  your drug of choice, the getting high, the binge that could go on for days, weeks or even years, add to that your compromised health situation at the moment(very worrying) then the coming down the feeling like death, the guilt, the regret, the having to find the strength to start all over again. Its it really worth it? Play this scenario in your mind, it has worked for me many times.

Also, pick up the phone, find a supportive someone and talk, talk till you are cried and talked out. Remember we cant do this alone. Does your group have a system in place when a member can come to your home? Find someone, do it now DO NOT USE!. I wish you much strength xx

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Look in the Health Pages for PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome) =  and also look into cravings........The PAWS is real but if you recognize it you can deal with it..... there are many ways to deal with cravings - - many feel that a craving is a bio-electric short circuit - - but they are real. And they go away after an amount of clean time. Getting high will not get you to group - in fact "group" would probably be concerned to know that your alternative to them would be using. Treat yourself well for pneumonia - take something for the fever - - follow up with the Doc if you still have SOB dramatically......may need antibiotics to clear the pneumonia........  Dont stress yourself into a panic attack - it sounds like you are close...  Try and do some breathing exercises - - breathe in deeply and all the way to the Buddha belly in your abdomen - - do this to a slow ten count - - - - -  then exhale fully and completely to that same ten count............ and relax............. 47 days is awesome - - make sure that you can say 48 days tomorrow -------

[GA Guy]

Are you talking about your NA group? Have you been to the doctor?