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Oxycontin tapering vs. Suboxone
Hello folks,
I am somewhat surprised to find myself talking on a bulletin board about being an oxycontin addict, but oh well.
I have some chronic knee osteoarthritis. I was reading an article on it, last year, when up popped an ad talking about an osteoarthritis clinical trial. I clicked on it, took the survey, and ended up getting enrolled.
The way it worked was 1/3 of the subjects got some new experimental medication that was an opiate, but supposedly freer of side-effects including addiction. 1/3 got oxycontin, and 1/3 got placebo. I was sure from the first dose that I got one of the non-placebo drugs.
About a month in, my curiosity got the better of me and I broke open a capsule to see what was inside. Inside were small round tablets I was able to identify off the internet as oxycontin. I read about how people abuse them by crushing snorting, and, surprise, surprise, decided to try it myself. My dose kept being gradually increased until over the last few weeks it was 100 mg per day.
I've been on it now for 4 1/2 weeks. I went in last Thursday for my regular appointment at the clinic, and the nurse I've been dealing announced, to my great shock, that they wouldn't be issuing any more study medication, and essentially I was on my own. I had previously asked her and she had told me that, yes, I would be tapered off the drugs once the study was over, but last week she seemed to just be telling me to go off and enjoy my withdrawal.
I begged and pleaded until finally she went and got one of the doctors (not the one involved in the study, and he rather grudgingly gave me a scrip for 20 x 20mg, with instructions to take one or two per day, as needed.
Trying to stay on 40 mg was murder, and I didn't make it. I was sick as a dog with all the symptoms I've now learned go with withdrawal, including chills, muscle twitches, horrible pain in the stomach, diahrrea, and vomiting.
Monday I did make it down to 40 mg, but went to the doctor's office, and this time saw the main doctor, and he wrote me a scrip for 30 x 10g to help taper. I confess I am finding it hard not to cheat and go back up with the dose, and yesterday went back up to 60 mg.
I have heard a lot about Suxoxone. Would it be better to get off Oxy via Suboxone or to keep trying to taper down? I was proud of myself because this doctor wanted to offer me a scrip for 60 x 20 mg, but I adjusted it downward. That much and any slight self-control I've got going would have flown out the window.
What do folks think is the right way to approach getting off the stuff, for a guy in my situation? I realize that by some standards my dose wasn't that high and I haven't been taking it was long as many, but the withdrawal was VERY real.
I am not going to go looking for street drugs of lying to doctors to try to get more. I know I'm done with it, other than the approximately 400 mg I now have left.
Any help or thoughts would be appreciated.
Richard
I am somewhat surprised to find myself talking on a bulletin board about being an oxycontin addict, but oh well.
I have some chronic knee osteoarthritis. I was reading an article on it, last year, when up popped an ad talking about an osteoarthritis clinical trial. I clicked on it, took the survey, and ended up getting enrolled.
The way it worked was 1/3 of the subjects got some new experimental medication that was an opiate, but supposedly freer of side-effects including addiction. 1/3 got oxycontin, and 1/3 got placebo. I was sure from the first dose that I got one of the non-placebo drugs.
About a month in, my curiosity got the better of me and I broke open a capsule to see what was inside. Inside were small round tablets I was able to identify off the internet as oxycontin. I read about how people abuse them by crushing snorting, and, surprise, surprise, decided to try it myself. My dose kept being gradually increased until over the last few weeks it was 100 mg per day.
I've been on it now for 4 1/2 weeks. I went in last Thursday for my regular appointment at the clinic, and the nurse I've been dealing announced, to my great shock, that they wouldn't be issuing any more study medication, and essentially I was on my own. I had previously asked her and she had told me that, yes, I would be tapered off the drugs once the study was over, but last week she seemed to just be telling me to go off and enjoy my withdrawal.
I begged and pleaded until finally she went and got one of the doctors (not the one involved in the study, and he rather grudgingly gave me a scrip for 20 x 20mg, with instructions to take one or two per day, as needed.
Trying to stay on 40 mg was murder, and I didn't make it. I was sick as a dog with all the symptoms I've now learned go with withdrawal, including chills, muscle twitches, horrible pain in the stomach, diahrrea, and vomiting.
Monday I did make it down to 40 mg, but went to the doctor's office, and this time saw the main doctor, and he wrote me a scrip for 30 x 10g to help taper. I confess I am finding it hard not to cheat and go back up with the dose, and yesterday went back up to 60 mg.
I have heard a lot about Suxoxone. Would it be better to get off Oxy via Suboxone or to keep trying to taper down? I was proud of myself because this doctor wanted to offer me a scrip for 60 x 20 mg, but I adjusted it downward. That much and any slight self-control I've got going would have flown out the window.
What do folks think is the right way to approach getting off the stuff, for a guy in my situation? I realize that by some standards my dose wasn't that high and I haven't been taking it was long as many, but the withdrawal was VERY real.
I am not going to go looking for street drugs of lying to doctors to try to get more. I know I'm done with it, other than the approximately 400 mg I now have left.
Any help or thoughts would be appreciated.
Richard
congratulations on the way you're handling your ordeal. I went back on my oxy 20s but
my regular dose doesn't control the pain like it did just 2 weeks ago. Another week and it should be better. At next dr. appt I'll ask him to switch me to 10 mg (90/month at first)
with some 5/325 percs. And I can go back to a slow wean 5 mgs at a time. Did it to get from 160mg/day down to 40mg/day but it took a few years. I need it to be over
my regular dose doesn't control the pain like it did just 2 weeks ago. Another week and it should be better. At next dr. appt I'll ask him to switch me to 10 mg (90/month at first)
with some 5/325 percs. And I can go back to a slow wean 5 mgs at a time. Did it to get from 160mg/day down to 40mg/day but it took a few years. I need it to be over
To everyone,
Today was not a great day but I made it through. I confess to drinking rather more beer than I should have but it was my first day with truly only 10 mg of oxy (I found a 10 mg pill on the floor of the bathroom yesterday--you would have thought I had stumbled upon the Hope Diamond).
I took some hydrocodone that I had around, hoping to take the edge off a bit. I drank beer. I made it through. Eventually, I know, I will be without all of these chemical mood changers, but today I just needed something.
The temptation to try to get more pills increases daily, as my dose goes down and then goes away. I can't believe the extent to which this medication gets under your skin and into every fibre of your being. I seriously have this belief system now, at times anyway, that life will not be worth living without my daily dose of oxycontin. Or that once I get clean I'll just be biding time until I get to have it again. I have spent as much as ten years clean and sober in the past and I know I can do it again, but this is damned tough to go through.
Thank you, flutterby, for the encouraging words. I especially need to believe that this bad feeling of lacking something will pass. It's like I suddenly developed an oxycontin deficiency, which strangely enough I never had until I started to take it like it was candy.
Speaking of candy, someone on another list I use for general addiction issues called it "the Devil's candy." I can buy that.
Today was not a great day but I made it through. I confess to drinking rather more beer than I should have but it was my first day with truly only 10 mg of oxy (I found a 10 mg pill on the floor of the bathroom yesterday--you would have thought I had stumbled upon the Hope Diamond).
I took some hydrocodone that I had around, hoping to take the edge off a bit. I drank beer. I made it through. Eventually, I know, I will be without all of these chemical mood changers, but today I just needed something.
The temptation to try to get more pills increases daily, as my dose goes down and then goes away. I can't believe the extent to which this medication gets under your skin and into every fibre of your being. I seriously have this belief system now, at times anyway, that life will not be worth living without my daily dose of oxycontin. Or that once I get clean I'll just be biding time until I get to have it again. I have spent as much as ten years clean and sober in the past and I know I can do it again, but this is damned tough to go through.
Thank you, flutterby, for the encouraging words. I especially need to believe that this bad feeling of lacking something will pass. It's like I suddenly developed an oxycontin deficiency, which strangely enough I never had until I started to take it like it was candy.
Speaking of candy, someone on another list I use for general addiction issues called it "the Devil's candy." I can buy that.
I kept a chart as well...tapered down and clean now for almost 3 months...it is worth it...tapering is not easy and i still had some wds...but not long and not bad...good luck! hang in there
I'm not on sub -- I think there's another kittykat here -- kittykat32. I'm kittykat58, and still tapering.
it's really hard, esp the first few days dropping down to the next level, but I find I do adjust. what's really weird is I am finding I am more sensitive to the narcs than I was when taking a higher dose - I thought it would be the opposite. I thought it would be such torture tapering b/c it would be like, "well, wow - I'll be going all that time using all my dope but only feeling bad and getting no buzz". but it's not true. if I take 20 mgs oxy in the morning, and then wait 4 hours and take 1.5 percs -- I still feel it, get a little pain relief, get a little buzz, too. I thought I'd be getting bupkis. I was taking 30mgs oxy 3X/day with 4-6 percs for bt...now I'm taking 20mgs oxy in the am and 20 mgs in the afternoon, and 1.5 percs 2-3X/day -- and I get good effect.
soon I want to drop it down to 10mgs oxy 3X/day, then 2X/day with percs for bt....those are my next goals. it is really hard though b/c my body and brain constantly tell me to take more (esp since I =have= more!!), but if I stay disciplined I am finding I am still getting reasonable pain relief w./out having to go through complete wds....it's hard, but it is do-able. you have to completely commit to the long-term goal.
I find it helps me too to keep a chart -- then I see my progress coming down and can feel proud and good. and I feel like I'm waking up, coming back from the dead, being more fun to be around at work, remembering more, making more sense, etc. that's a nice feeling
it's really hard, esp the first few days dropping down to the next level, but I find I do adjust. what's really weird is I am finding I am more sensitive to the narcs than I was when taking a higher dose - I thought it would be the opposite. I thought it would be such torture tapering b/c it would be like, "well, wow - I'll be going all that time using all my dope but only feeling bad and getting no buzz". but it's not true. if I take 20 mgs oxy in the morning, and then wait 4 hours and take 1.5 percs -- I still feel it, get a little pain relief, get a little buzz, too. I thought I'd be getting bupkis. I was taking 30mgs oxy 3X/day with 4-6 percs for bt...now I'm taking 20mgs oxy in the am and 20 mgs in the afternoon, and 1.5 percs 2-3X/day -- and I get good effect.
soon I want to drop it down to 10mgs oxy 3X/day, then 2X/day with percs for bt....those are my next goals. it is really hard though b/c my body and brain constantly tell me to take more (esp since I =have= more!!), but if I stay disciplined I am finding I am still getting reasonable pain relief w./out having to go through complete wds....it's hard, but it is do-able. you have to completely commit to the long-term goal.
I find it helps me too to keep a chart -- then I see my progress coming down and can feel proud and good. and I feel like I'm waking up, coming back from the dead, being more fun to be around at work, remembering more, making more sense, etc. that's a nice feeling
You won't always feel like this, but please don't be discouraged if it doesn't get better overnight. It will take time. In a few days you should feel a difference! ☺
To Rich and Kitty,
I'm so impressed with those who can taper. ALthough, I believe Kitty has turned to Sub now-which is a great tool to stay clean.
Do you think you'll need aftercare RIch? Or was this it? I only got the drugs from the doctors...never bought them from the streets. But I still started going to NA meetings last Friday. Been to 3 this week. Just to keep positive.
To Rich and Kitty,
I'm so impressed with those who can taper. ALthough, I believe Kitty has turned to Sub now-which is a great tool to stay clean.
Do you think you'll need aftercare RIch? Or was this it? I only got the drugs from the doctors...never bought them from the streets. But I still started going to NA meetings last Friday. Been to 3 this week. Just to keep positive.
glad to hear of your progress. today I had 40mg oxy and 4.5 tabs of percocet. I feel a little racy but basically ok. I am ignoring that little voice that is telling me I can have another 10mg of oxy b/c I've been "good". I want to get this DOWN. it helps so much to keep it on a chart (shows me my progress) and it helps to write about it here, too.
you are so intelligent. I can hear it in the way you write. and it is true that you will feel "normal" someday. I don't know when. but if you think about the emotional and mental physical strain of drug dependence, and the stress of withdrawal, it's no wonder you are tired and wanting to sleep. I wish I could just crawl into bed and sleep, but I have a job and a husband and a child and about a billion things I have to take care of every week....
I think it's awesome that you're doing a better-than-nothing work out, too. ...
anyway..., keep going, you rock! :)
you are so intelligent. I can hear it in the way you write. and it is true that you will feel "normal" someday. I don't know when. but if you think about the emotional and mental physical strain of drug dependence, and the stress of withdrawal, it's no wonder you are tired and wanting to sleep. I wish I could just crawl into bed and sleep, but I have a job and a husband and a child and about a billion things I have to take care of every week....
I think it's awesome that you're doing a better-than-nothing work out, too. ...
anyway..., keep going, you rock! :)
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