Relapsed AGAIN...

[sylvia21]

So this is the 2nd time in a couple months I've relapsed on vicodin. I went 19 days in October then caved in and got a refill and went back on them for 6 days. I ended up flushing the rest because I wanted to quit again. So then the holidays rolled around...which are depressing for me as I'm sure lots of other people, and this past Wednesday after 24 days I caved in AGAIN and refilled my rx. I took my last pill last night and flushed the rest, yet again.  I am so ashamed and embarassed, all I feel like doing is crying and screaming because I came so far TWO times and ruined it. I was only on them for 4 days this time around before deciding to get rid of the rest. The sad part is, I took them to basically "numb" myself through Thanksgiving and all it ended up doing was making me edgy, tired and snappy! Completely different how they used to make me feel. It's weird, they had the reverse effect on me it seemed. Maybe it's a sign?? IDK. I'm meeting with my therapist on Tuesday (he knows all about this) and hopefully we can come up with a better game plan for me as to how to fight these nasty relapses. I have a couple questions if you guys don't mind....am I going to go through w/d's again? And if so, how long will they last? I am hoping and praying this is the last time I have to hang my head while posting on here....I don't know how much more I can take! Please help me!

[sylvia21]

And the w/d's have started....just as the 24 hour mark hit. The diarreha, vomiting and nauseua. I feel AWFUL! This is definatley enough to keep me on the straight & narrow, ughhh!

[gnarly_1]

HI Sylvia......sorry to here about your relapse so this is the second time in a couple of months
its time to step up your recovery care another notch .....N/A is a great place to start going
you can share your feeling there and if your shy you can just sit and lissen...I see a substance abuse conslor once a week but when im struggling im off to our local N/A meeting
there are times when you just need to step it up a bit.....you will like it I have made friends there and I have never been to a meeting that I dident get something out of...it might just be the missing link here for you...I wish you luck with your detox you know the drill get to a meeting as soon as you can I really feel it will help you good luck and God bless...Gnarly

[sylvia21]

Thanks everyone, I don't have any refills left on the script, and plan on calling my MD tomorrow to let him know NO MORE.  And yes Dav125 is was more then a couple. I just desperately want my life back and I think this was/is the last straw.

[jeffclowns]

should be about the same as the last 2 times no better probably no worse you know what i mean ...i don't know obviously i can't tell you about the w/d's cause you been through it before i just hope this will be the last time you keep putting yourself through this cause i would not like to go into the w/d's again and i am only 26 days off of vicodin so i know it's got to be upsetting to you but just never give up and keep trying you know hopefully this will be you final time and you can move on without the little devils...i did love how you said it was not the same that's great so that's something you ain't gonna miss so now you just need to make a plan and that's great you going to the therapist that will help out and just figure out the way to keep your mind off the pills ,i wish you the best and god bless you..Jeff....

[IBKleen]

I chased that first high for over 40 years and never did catch it. It gets to the point where it just doesn't work anymore.

I am sorry that this happened but hopefully you learned something from it and hopefully you will change things now. Your way isn't working so I will pray that you get the outside support you need to stay clean.

[Dav125]

you will have "some wd's"..It depends on how many you were taking each day..If just a couple, I'd say they wouldn't be too bad..I have a feeling though it was more than a couple though..

My guess is whatever you experienced the first time when you slipped for 6 days is probably what you can expect this round...

[GeorgiaGirl1022]

Dav is right. Call your doctor tomorrow tell him to cancel your script then tell him to put in your chart u can't have pain meds. I know if u really wanted to u could see any dr to get them but closing 1 door will help. Lots of people relapse but you just have to pick yourself up and move forward. I'm not sure about wd's but I'm sure there will be some price to pay. Good luck!

[Dav125]

Got to decide to quit torturing yourself..If you have anymore refills on that bottle, it might be in your best interest to cancel them.. That would be the first step..