Ex Drug User Health Concerens

[waterandsleep]

Hi,

Basically I've turned my life around, very much into fitness and have been clean for 1.5 years(pot) and over 2 years hard drugs(with the exception of mushrooms and a hydrocodiene pain pill taken on separate occasion to much regret). During my time of use though, hard drug usage being 18-28, I used cocaine quite a bit, I would say every two years I would have a span of using the drug, mostly on my own, every week, sometimes twice on a weekend, for about 1-2 months. Last year of high school I did it towards the end, maybe a few times 7 lines or so, then undergrad I can't remember the specifics now that I think about it I might have just smoked pot undergrad, weird I did write a drug usage timeline but threw it away, so good chance no coke in undergrad, but grad I moved to Europe to study and in my 2nd year depression hit hard being away from home, being stuck in Geneva, music conservatory, somehow got desperate for pot because i could not find anyone who dealt and went on the streets asking random people. These guys hooked me up but only if I took a line of speed, from there I think it got bad for a good two years, there was a park where I would go and get a gram, usually 100 bucks, and do that with alot of weed by myself, in my apartment, just listen to music and feel good for a bit. I would do that 2 times a week, was so addicted i could not go more then one day, and it would last maybe 1 month. So I probably spent 1300 on drugs that time, I started dating this girl and decided to clean my act up. or at least I was not happy with who I was, made several attempts to clean up, and did in fact for a year, had one slip up but for 1.5 years stayed clean except occasional pot. Did not workout and left Geneva, moved back to US, was depressed having no career and being fat, was forced to find work by parents, went to psych ward(had lived in London for 6 months studying but it made me so depressed) twice, was prescribed lithium and other anti-depressants, was told I was bi polar but convinced I wasn't, freakin' nightmare. All I wanted was to get in shape and look good, well I did use coke again maybe 7 times over 2 years, got an apartment by myself and this time was struggling to get clean. Rock bottom was July 2013, using meth after 7 times felt I could not control it and called the cops on myself, after a rough AA meeting. Was thinking rehab, but decided to listen to sponsor, go to AA and clean up. Was hard, working 3 jobs, unhappy with everything, managed to see psych again but was just prescribed meds. August 2013 was my last time using hard drugs, took some molly, and said enough. Had to use pot to stay clean, had my last battles with gambling(wasn't a huge gambler but enough to make bad things happen), sponsor said no more contact if smoking pot, Feb 2014 did mushrooms-massive peer pressure from where I worked, and June one hydrocodeine pill-peer pressure old high school friend. June 2014 I decided to quit pot, joined a gym, signed up for a Spartan Sprint in Nov. Quit toxic job Oct. 31 2014, got a bike August 2014 to get around-bicycle, weighed 252 in June 2014, August 2015 202. Have been clean since except the times I noted. Drink about 2 glasses of wine a month max, I don't like that number but am just trying to clean up nutrition/lifetstyle. My goal is to lower body fat next year and be completely healthy physically financially and mentally.

Okay to save time, I have spent this year, more specifically since March 1st, dedicating myself to getting in peak shape, I've done some good things, hit some great weights in the gym, lost weight, cleaned up diet, learned alot about nutrition through books/experience/forums, finished Couch to 5K,(plan on running first 5K next year in 29 min and finishing my first Spartan Sprint). Also side note cut out toxic relationships, meditated, done yoga, cycled everywhere, through this time though I realize that drugs may have permanently hurt my body. I know the body is resilient, just last year I was only hoping to survive the year, now I am grateful to be concerned about long term affects from bad drug use.
With my cocaine experience, the chemicals cut with it, what are some things to look out for? I remember using my esophagus would feel kind of sensitive/gut area, I don't know if that's normal, but I find the same ache now and it just annoys me I made such stupid mistakes.
I think support is the most important thing for consistent staying clean lifestyle, it's hard to find but invaluable. Old friends/family will always associate and feel tied to past experiences, pointless to try and make a new relationship. Out with the old in with the new

[real_jimmy]

I agree to what Msdelight said and i would like to add that past is something you cannot change, but making smart and intelligent choices in the present will change you for good. take care and wish you all the best for your future.

[msdelight]

Congratulations on your clean time, and welcome to the forum! That is quite a story of victory you wrote.  I think that you are young and healthy and committed to keeping it that way. I wouldn't overthink the damage however. You may just have acid reflux.  Keep up the great work and always think positive thoughts.