HOLY MOLY ANXIETY ... UGH :(

[takingmylifeback2014]

HI ALL -
JUST COMPLAINING A LITTLE ... JEEZ THIS ANXIETY IS SO INTENSE AND NOT FUN! VERY HARD TO DISTRACT MYSELF. I AM FINDING THIS PART VERY DIFFICULT. 38 DAYS TODAY SO I GUESS I JUST GOTTA KEEP PUSHING THROUGH!
JUST WANTED TO LET EVERYONE KNOW THIS FOR ME HAS BEEN VERY TOUGH. I HAVE NOT HAD CRAVINGS NOR DO I WANT TO USE ... BUT JEEZ THIS STINKS!

[meegWpaw]

lifeback I still think your doing great, hang on.  I am sorry its  been so hard for you and that your going thru so much hardship.  I do not think your being a baby !!!  this is hard stuff ... keep going ...  still here for you

[Yesidid]

Personally I hated anxiety more than any other feeling in the world, until I found regret. You are doing the right thing for the right reasons. Find new ways to cope. Have you tried exercise? I haven't :-) but I've been meaning to!

[wannabedrugfree]

In the same boat. 25 days without Lortabs and the anxiety is killing me. I'm a 52 year old male. I havn't cried since I was a child. Now I can't stop. Everything is doom and gloom. My wife of 30 years left. I am broke. I have to find I new home for my family. My cars are broken. I had to bring my daughter home from collage. I work 12 hour shifts and my dog is sick. Really. And none of this was caused by my small Lortab habit. It was because of all this that I knew I needed to quit so I could think clearly. The first five days were awful. I ok now except for sleep and anxiety.
My wife retured after being gone five weeks but is very sick emotionaly and mentaly. I have to keep all stress and problems away from her. She can't work so we are trying to live on just my income. Saying all this to explain my anxeity levels. It helps me to know I have support and to talk with others. I meet with my Pastor once a week and I see a Christain mental health therapist once a week. Without them and this message board I would go crazy. I'm no hero but I think if I can do this under these conditions then there is a good chance anyone could do it. The anxeity reminds me of when I was young and my Mom was killed in a car wreck. I thought the hurt would never go away. It took years, but it did slowly go away. I'm hoping that this anxiety will slowly go away also. Did I mention that I have God in my life and He comforts and helps me. If a person doesn't have everything right between him and God then nothing in life will ever be right either. Sorry if all this is scattered. Hope something here helps. I will pray for you.

[jethro733]

Anxiety is thought.  Thought is always searching for security.  Either in the past or future as a function of memory and time.  Observing thought (not what thought has made) will help calm the mind.


  

[takingmylifeback2014]

I do that alot too and he loves the attention .... As I love holding him too! It is the best feeling ever! Thanks for this post! I honestly needed it today! I cant wait to go home and hug him. XOXO
I know I need to keep telling myself this is all going to be way worth the reward! I want it so bad I cant even explain it!
You guys are all awesomeI can't thank you enough for all your support when I really need it!

[weaver71]

My first months I hugged my kids a lot. Probably annoyed them some. I'd just hold them and tell them how much I love them and focus on that love. They were old enough to know I was detoxing, 9&11, but I bet that 2 yr old doesn't mind the attention. I can't say my anxiety stopped all of a sudden, but those hugs really reminded me that I can love as pure as them again, and I do now. It is so worth the worst of it, no joke.

[takingmylifeback2014]

Thank you Seriously! :-)

[kyle505]

We have to be honest with each other, especially in situations like yours. Any addict who's recovered has been through all of the crap that you are experiencing, and if anyone isn't honest, no matter how hard it may be, then they really aren't doing you any favors. Sometimes though, it's difficult because we have to weight the prospect of increasing someone's anxiety level by telling the truth.
And by the way, you aren't being a baby. We ALL are going or have gone through what you're feeling. I decided to get a haircut when my anxiety was in high gear. I got to the hair place, it was closed, so I cried all the way home. Why? You got me. Anyway, hang in there. You're doing great.
K

[takingmylifeback2014]

I get it! But my son is 2 LOL so he cant help me. Physically I am feeling pretty good I can clean and do what I have to do but Mentally I am screwed. My anxiety has the best of me right now! I wake up full of anxiety its just weird. I dont like it at all ... It ***** just mentally feeling liek crap for so long you know! I guess I am just venting. I hired a house cleaner to come once a week so I am not that stressed about my house looking like crap! I am mentally just screwy LOL

[motye51]

That's exactly what it is....your trying to be right back where you were before Jan 1st....I know you all have to eat and have a home, I get it, we all have to work, (I'm at work right now but if they fired me today I wouldn't care!!!  lol)   but my house looks like ****, I told all of my kids "Mom is sick and might be sick for a couple of weeks" "Please don't take me being "sick" to mean I don't love you!"  If my husband EVER wants to get laid again, he's going to step up his game.  We've been running the show "Wonder Woman!"  It's time we got a little help!

[takingmylifeback2014]

Thanks Girl! Damn I am a mess ... It comes in these stupid waves. I didnt get to google the meditation step yet. I will do it now. At work I am going and going all day! Work in Finance so I need to be on top of my **** .... Then at home I have a little one who wants to play and play UGH I need to do something for myself ... Like a spa day or something! Fiance got a different job so he is working so much and I am trying to be super woman .... I guess I am not her anymore LOL

[takingmylifeback2014]

Thanks I guess I am just being a baby?! Your right I am paying my dues to the devil ... I hate the Devil LOL Thanks for being Honest! Very much appreciated!

[motye51]

Breathe, breathe, breathe!!!!  Slow down and relax for a minute.  Sometimes I just shut my eyes and sit even if it's just for a minute, and it will pass.  Still feeling like ****, I hear ya, but it's going to pass! (At least that's what everyone keeps telling me! lol)  Are you trying to do to much??  It definitely seems to be going up and down!  Still listening to music? Not kidding about the meditation....I have a cd called "brain food" that I had bought before all of this crap, and when I just can't take it anymore, I listen to it.  Don't try to do to much, b/c that's when I find **** doesn't work like we want it to.  Don't USE!!!  Your too far ahead!  Forward, remember!

[kyle505]

You are paying your dues. That's how I looked at it. I used for many years, and to think that I'd get out of it with just a runny nose or an upset stomach was foolish, but I hoped that would be the case.
You danced with the devil, now you need to pay him his due and move on. The anxiety will lessen as time passes, so hang in there. And like Weaver said, they are only feelings. Try to stay focused. You are on the detox roller coaster, so buckle up and hang on.
K

[takingmylifeback2014]

Thanks Guys! I am really struggling with the mental, so much anxiety I feel like a mess! :-(

[jugglin]

I'm sorry you are still struggling with the mental/emotional part. You have made it 38 days and THAT is awesome. You've got this.  Keep pushing through each minute, hour, day. Feel free to complain and get it out. Sending a prayer for inner peace and strength your way.

[weaver71]

Remember, they are only feelings, which come and go with the wind. Anxiety was one of my biggest struggles, that and not sleeping for 20 days. My anxiety came from all the unresolved feelings I have. Resentments, frustration with myself, and my heart being wide open was a whirl of thoughts and feelings. Sorting that out has been a huge part of my aftercare. I started learning that I have always felt some of those things and that is part of why I escaped in drugs. I decided I couldn't make the anxiety fade by will nor by simply waiting, I had to face it head on and get help unstuffing some old feelings. I think CBT was what finally helped me break the habit of holding onto negative things and embracing a new outlook. You are still in the thick of it, hang in there. Keep looking for new ways to cope, you will not not regret the work, I don't anyway.

[takingmylifeback2014]

Thanks! I have to Post it helps me .... I am at my witts end with feeling not happy, moody, anxious (extremely) at times I cant even focus! I just want to feel betterrr!!!!!

Thanks for replying, it means alot to me :-)

[katmandu516]

I was the same way you are. I was at 30 days and was soo pissed off that I still didn't feel good. I kept posting and posting..."When will I feel better?". But before I knew it, I felt better. Give it a bit more time...Soak in your hot baths, do what you love to do. What makes you the happiest....And you'll be ok. Hang in there...you're almost there. Keep fighting the good fight to get your life back!

[ROSYouralright]

38 days is AWESOME!
°*”˜˜”*°•.¸★☆★¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.
          YOU ROCK!
°*”˜˜”*°•.¸★☆★¸.•°*”˜˜”*°•.
  Hang in there!! The emotional rollercoaster WILL level out!! Just takes time...