Aa
see what i mean?
kell737 asks "You guys are probably going to think I'm stupid but what does snorting Oxy's do to you? How does it make you feel? ....Is it the same as swolling them? Just curious, I always too them by mouth."
groovygirl's answer to kell737 "yeah man, it's so cool to snort them...you get SO high - you see, they are time-released so when you crush them, the time release action is ruined and you get the full effect of the drug all at once. that is why so many teenagers overdose and DIE from doing it...yeah, that's how it makes you feel - SO cool....any questions?"
since i got so much **** when i brought this up before, is this more of the type of response you'd like from members of this forum?
groovygirl's answer to kell737 "yeah man, it's so cool to snort them...you get SO high - you see, they are time-released so when you crush them, the time release action is ruined and you get the full effect of the drug all at once. that is why so many teenagers overdose and DIE from doing it...yeah, that's how it makes you feel - SO cool....any questions?"
since i got so much **** when i brought this up before, is this more of the type of response you'd like from members of this forum?
Great post Allisa. It helps to let it out. I feel for ya. I know how it is. I have been there. I know how bad it hurts.
It hurts so bad to think about it. I can't stop crying. I hate this pain too. Sometimes I feel like I don't have anybody in life. I haven't talk to, or seen, my parents in years. My brother, well I guess he really isn't my brother. I haven't heard from him but twice in the last 10. I feel like I have LOST them, that they have already DIED.
Let it out Allisa. That is what this is for. Use it to your advantage. Get it out.
Some posts are so hard to write that I have gotten sick. It hurts. I hate it.
I'll write more later. I just can't right now.......
Chezz
P.S. You do keep it "spunky" in here.
It hurts so bad to think about it. I can't stop crying. I hate this pain too. Sometimes I feel like I don't have anybody in life. I haven't talk to, or seen, my parents in years. My brother, well I guess he really isn't my brother. I haven't heard from him but twice in the last 10. I feel like I have LOST them, that they have already DIED.
Let it out Allisa. That is what this is for. Use it to your advantage. Get it out.
Some posts are so hard to write that I have gotten sick. It hurts. I hate it.
I'll write more later. I just can't right now.......
Chezz
P.S. You do keep it "spunky" in here.
Allisa, i definately am old enough to be your father; and from one of your first posts way back, i heard your crys for help.
What a courageous precious young women you are; yet "raw".
Spunky and truthful. Talking about masterbating to help with w/d, or what a rush these silly pills give us...again just being energetic and Truthful.
I'd wondered myself why the binging, when i can feel your desire to be clean and move on. It all takes time and Steps.
I'm just thrilled you keep coming back because, although i don't know you, you really have a lot to offer this world.
You described your lit'l sister as "still very pure"
I don't view you ANY LESS PURE because of self-medicating to numb some horrific/traumatizing events in your life.(plus the buzz wasn't bad either, i know)
WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What a courageous precious young women you are; yet "raw".
Spunky and truthful. Talking about masterbating to help with w/d, or what a rush these silly pills give us...again just being energetic and Truthful.
I'd wondered myself why the binging, when i can feel your desire to be clean and move on. It all takes time and Steps.
I'm just thrilled you keep coming back because, although i don't know you, you really have a lot to offer this world.
You described your lit'l sister as "still very pure"
I don't view you ANY LESS PURE because of self-medicating to numb some horrific/traumatizing events in your life.(plus the buzz wasn't bad either, i know)
WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi--I'm probably old enough to be your mother, but maybe I can be a friend/mother....Low self-esteem has got to be the common thread that binds all of us addicts. It is the reason we self-medicate, abuse ourselves, which ,in turn, makes us loathe ourselves even more, so we take more pills, and on and on ad nauseam. You have have a tough time in your most important relationships. Their inadequacies are not a reflection of YOU--the way you've been treated doesn't mean that you DESERVE to be treated that way. You are not worthless. The fact that you want to do well in college, (stay in school!!!) that you want to clean up and make something of yourself tells me that deep down you believe that success is possible for you, in spite of the odds. Your weight is just a number, but I can relate to being over weight because I've been there, and I've been very thin, too. The whole issue can quickly become the driving force in your life if you let it. CEO's, Pulitzer Prize winners, or great artists aren't WEIGHED ...it has no bearing on their accomplishments. Some how you have to tune out the negativity and listen to your own heart. Do this for YOU.
Allisa first I accept you just as you are.I know all to well
what drugs can do to your body.I am 6'2" and in may of last year I was at 200lbs.That is slim for me,I too have always had a weight problem all my life.I was always bigger and taller than my same age friends.I even had to carry around my birth certificate just so I could play baseball and basketball in the same age group all my childhood.All the other teams thought I was older because I was bigger.When I started taking the methadone after surgery last year I began to gain weight and
as of this past August I had gained 55 lbs.At 255 I am still
me even though I don't like it, I too started slimfast.I eat one meal a day and it's suppertime,that's dinner to you northerner's.
Not you Allisa,I'm sure being where you are it's supper time.
A little humor does us all good.
As for the other,It is really terrible how so many people are abused growing up.I have never been in that situation before but I can only imagine that it does make one out to be a tuff
person.I could not imagine abusing my 6 year old daughter regardless of being drunk or not but I know it goes on and it is sad.If you are covering up that pain with drugs,you need help
dealing with it.But hey,I don't know **** about family abuse.
My dad was always too busy at work to abuse me or my family.I didn't see him that much the first 10 years of my life.He
worked for an insurance company and was in the beginning stage of computers,back when one computer filled up a room.I remember like it was yesterday him coming home with a arm load of IBM punchcards.You're too young to know about these I am sure but in the 70's computers where a thing of the future.Anyway I accept
you for who you are!!Always.As for your using,that is a call you
have to make.I don't judge anyone that feels that need.I have been there all to often myself and I know relapse.Just hang in there and stop listening to others about your weight and everything they say to you.Self esteem is something I have had to learn,like you I didn't have any until I met my wife in 1994.
Since I met her,she taught me it really is on the inside.She is a beautiful woman and everyone around said 'Bill' to her because she's 5 foot tall and gorgeuos and I'm 6'4 and got hair halfway down my back in a ponytail.Behind our back they called us the yuppie and the hippy.But one thing I have learned that until you start treating yourself as a winner,you won't be.It's what you demand of others that will make them respect you.Being 21 you are still a young-un.No offense.As the old saying goes,pull yourself up by the bootstraps and demand respect or move on.
Always here for you!I think you are wonderful and I have only seen your inside person,so there stop it.See yourself as I see myself.I am important and I like myself.God I sound like a Saturday Night Live character.something 'Smiley' I forgot his name.Let me know how your day goes.
bmac
what drugs can do to your body.I am 6'2" and in may of last year I was at 200lbs.That is slim for me,I too have always had a weight problem all my life.I was always bigger and taller than my same age friends.I even had to carry around my birth certificate just so I could play baseball and basketball in the same age group all my childhood.All the other teams thought I was older because I was bigger.When I started taking the methadone after surgery last year I began to gain weight and
as of this past August I had gained 55 lbs.At 255 I am still
me even though I don't like it, I too started slimfast.I eat one meal a day and it's suppertime,that's dinner to you northerner's.
Not you Allisa,I'm sure being where you are it's supper time.
A little humor does us all good.
As for the other,It is really terrible how so many people are abused growing up.I have never been in that situation before but I can only imagine that it does make one out to be a tuff
person.I could not imagine abusing my 6 year old daughter regardless of being drunk or not but I know it goes on and it is sad.If you are covering up that pain with drugs,you need help
dealing with it.But hey,I don't know **** about family abuse.
My dad was always too busy at work to abuse me or my family.I didn't see him that much the first 10 years of my life.He
worked for an insurance company and was in the beginning stage of computers,back when one computer filled up a room.I remember like it was yesterday him coming home with a arm load of IBM punchcards.You're too young to know about these I am sure but in the 70's computers where a thing of the future.Anyway I accept
you for who you are!!Always.As for your using,that is a call you
have to make.I don't judge anyone that feels that need.I have been there all to often myself and I know relapse.Just hang in there and stop listening to others about your weight and everything they say to you.Self esteem is something I have had to learn,like you I didn't have any until I met my wife in 1994.
Since I met her,she taught me it really is on the inside.She is a beautiful woman and everyone around said 'Bill' to her because she's 5 foot tall and gorgeuos and I'm 6'4 and got hair halfway down my back in a ponytail.Behind our back they called us the yuppie and the hippy.But one thing I have learned that until you start treating yourself as a winner,you won't be.It's what you demand of others that will make them respect you.Being 21 you are still a young-un.No offense.As the old saying goes,pull yourself up by the bootstraps and demand respect or move on.
Always here for you!I think you are wonderful and I have only seen your inside person,so there stop it.See yourself as I see myself.I am important and I like myself.God I sound like a Saturday Night Live character.something 'Smiley' I forgot his name.Let me know how your day goes.
bmac
I was lucky that night.My wife was so mad she was threatening to
kill me so the police where on my side.They even called someone to come and get me because they were afraid to let me near her.God,then she turned around and married my sorry ass.
I guess God had plans for that car,it was beautiful.I always think maybe it happened to keep her from wreaking it and getting hurt.ALL I got from it was a torn rotator cuff in my left shoulder from the seatbelt.
Well thanks for the laughs,I needed it today.
billy bass
kill me so the police where on my side.They even called someone to come and get me because they were afraid to let me near her.God,then she turned around and married my sorry ass.
I guess God had plans for that car,it was beautiful.I always think maybe it happened to keep her from wreaking it and getting hurt.ALL I got from it was a torn rotator cuff in my left shoulder from the seatbelt.
Well thanks for the laughs,I needed it today.
billy bass
holy ****... it is nice to laugh about this "past tense" stuff.
...unfortunately(or fortunately), i fled the scene, as it was broad daylight and clearly in an "honest booze i got no officer in my trunk" state; only to run out of gas 10 or 15 blocks later and grabbed by the police...
...unfortunately(or fortunately), i fled the scene, as it was broad daylight and clearly in an "honest booze i got no officer in my trunk" state; only to run out of gas 10 or 15 blocks later and grabbed by the police...
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
