sick of the Sub

[Kova]

Hi all,

Just wanted to say that i am done with taking the Sub.  today is day 22 with no methadone and yesterday i woke up and got a little more Sub from a friend.  i've been doing 2-3mgs of it at a time, sometimes skipping a few days until the WDs from the methadone get too bad, then do a bit more.  well, yesterday was a long work day for me and i thought i NEEDED some Sub, but after i took it my mood got even worse and i get these terrible headaches from it.  i took 4mgs when i could have gotten by on 2, a red flag for me right there.  althoug i was no longer extremely tired i was very b*tchy!  i hated how it changed my personality.  i even drive more aggressively!  i told my husband i honestly rather be dealing with the fatigue and blahness of the methadone WDs than take any more of that Sub.  it did help me get through when i felt like i was going to die, but at this point i honestly think i would rather suffer through it than feel that Suboxone headache and mood swing.  also, i thought it would help me sleep better but it did not, and today although i am not feeling sick my mood is worse than before i took the Sub.  so that is my verdict on the Sub.  i threw the rest of what i had down the toilet.  just hope this methadone detox doesn't hang on so much longer.  i've heard 1 month is a turning point?  is that true for any of you methadone people out there?

Kova

[KLM_81]

Hi. I just wanted to say that I just took my fist dose of Suboxone today, and I think it will work for me. I feel normal, but not euphoric. But, I am doing it to replace hydrocodone, not methadone. When I was on methadone though, I tried to kick it cold-turkey on my own, and yes.......1month was defintely the turning point physically. However, emotionally I was a complete wreck. And even though my body was not craving it, my mind never stopped. The only advice I can give you would be to eat very healthy, and excercise. Start off slow at first because your brain is going to have to learn to make it's own endorphins again. If you over do it you will be in a lot more pain than somebody that's not addicted to opiates. But it's my personal belief that if you exercise, your brain will heal itself much quicker than if you had just kicked the habit. GOOD LUCK! My prayers are with you!

[Kova]

thanks again everyone for the kindness.  a little love goes such a long way!  tysonred, i sent you some messages.

love you all!

Kove

[cattalina]

That's a big decision to make and it's likely a good one!  You caught your flags before it became too late... I hope you realize how HUGE that is!!  Be proud of yourself for recognizing it!  Also about the headaches - it's a pretty common side effect of the sub.  I had a migraine the first two weeks I was on it and then constant headaches for about 6 weeks after that!  And Chrissy is right - I've tapered down based on what my body tells me.  Going with your instincts on this one is a good choice.  I never took methadone, but I know it's very hard to come off of and it sounds like you're doing great!!  Keep in mind that with sub it tends to get worse before it gets better, but it does get better.  Hang in there! You will be in my thoughts as well... :)

[scaredmommie]

i now nothing about methadone, so i cant give you help there, but i do agree about the headaches since i been taking it i wake up every morning with one, but it fades by afternoon with some excedrian migrain. if there is one thing i learned from all my research on sub your body will tell you when its ready to stop, and it sounds like you are, if thats what you feel like is best for you, then i got your back all the way. but no matter which way you do it remember there is no wrong way of recovery, you just have to find which works best for you, and the whole point is to get clean. so i say do what your body feels is right. we can give you all the advice we can till we are blue in the face but only you know how your body feels. i wish you the best, and hope everything works out for you. your in my thoughs and prayers.

xoxoxo
<3 chrissy

[TysonRed]

The first time I quit methadone I was taking on average about 40-50mgs a day, I slowly tapered over about 6months before quitting. To be honest, the first month was pure torture, after I felt a little better, but it wasnt for 6-8months before I started to get my energy back. At some points I didnt notice the w/d's but other times it would feel like I just quit the day before. Try to keep as busy as possible,anything to keep your mind on something besides the fact that your withdrawling. When I would lay down to sleep thats when it was at its worst for many months my sleep was just messed up, basicly because I would just lay there and constantly think about it. Cant stress enough how mental the withdrawl from methadone is. Even going through all that, being clean for 1 1/2 yrs I still went back to taking opiates again. You should be through the worst of it, and hopefully you dont have the lingering effects I had cause I couldnt stand it. Good luck and like others have said look into getting all the vitamins, supplements and amino's that can help you out. Subligual B12 really helped me with energy sometimes, melatonin helped me sleep. If things get too bad you can always try and get a short script for a benzo to help, but you know how that goes just be careful. Truly, I wish you the best of luck, you can do it, especially if it's what you want. It will be so rewarding when it's all done, just dont do what I did and torture yourself all over again. Go kova Go!!!

[sadinmichigan]

I agree with you about the energy drinks/caffeine..it always made me worse. I honestly have found that getting outside and taking a brisk walk helped so much..the hardest part about it is doing it..I had to force myself but once I did..i actually was suprised that i felt better after..the fatigue definitley lingers. One thing though- you mentioned that your taking wellbutrin..did your Dr. say it was ok to take the aminos with it..i know that whenever anti-depressants are used the amino acids can conflict with them..just be careful..also ,next time you see your dr. have him give you a b-12 shot. i get them as much as possible. women really need their B.vitamins..I think in a few weeks that the fatigue will start lifting a bit..I know for me it was a good 6 weeks before i really started getting any energy and I think it has been the same for Kim715...please give a good old fashioned walk a try..get some sun on your face and soak up some vita D..I am so proud of you girl..and I feel the need again to apologize for yesterday..Anytime you need to vent/talk etc..I am here..k?  (BIG HUG)  Lisa

[Kova]

thanks Lisa.  you've been a big help from the beginning.  yes, i am taking all the amino acids and liquid b12 and liquid calcium magnesium and even an herbal mixture for anxiety.  it helps.  i have been on wellbutrin for about a year and a half for depression and although it has helped it doesn't quite cut the mustard for this WDs depression.  that is the worst part, along with the anxiety.   a few years back they misdiagnosed me with having bipolar disorder, but it was really just depression and irritablity from my ongoing binges on opiates, but that is another story...

anyway, about my fatigue, any suggestions with that?  whenever i take a caffeine stimulant it seems to make my WDs worse and just make me more irritable.

Kova

[sadinmichigan]

Congratulations again on quitting the methadone.it's such a hard thing to do . I quit c/t of 65mg..I forget what mgs you were on..but yes the w/ds last for about 6 weeks..you should start to feel better at the 4 week mark..You have already gone 22 days and girl..that is quite an accomplishment and you should be proud of yourself..I'd say it may linger on for a couple more weeks. hang in there..and please take a bunch of vitamins,supps etc...try and get out for a walk everyday..it does help..you can do this...sub is not anywhere near as strong as methadone . i don't blame you for just wanting to get this over with, because it will get better and you will be totally free. If i can help in anyway i would be more than happy to. did you ever get a chance to read the article in my journal about methadone/detox..it's written by a dr. who was also an addict. He has some very good suggestions on things you can do to help ease the w/d..take care..and congrats to you again...Lisa

[Soon2BMrsTurner]

If you are ready thats great. And I can understand about not wanting to get addicted to something else. I would just be careful taking it here and there. and waiting days in between. Sounds like you are ready and thats awesome, Take one day at a time and keep your head up

[Kova]

the LAST thing i want to do is get addicted to Sub and have to go through yet another set of WDs, but thanks for your input.  i really think i am ready to bite the bullet and go without.

Kova

[Soon2BMrsTurner]

I dont know anything about Methadone and very little about sub but enough to know that it would have been a good idea to have a sub doctor so that your levels stay even and that doesnt happen. Thats why the doctors tell you what dose to take and move the dose if needed so that you arent trying to do it on your own. What is good for others might not work for you. I have never been there but im sure it cant be good skipping days while on sub? I would think it needs to be a everyday thing.