not sure if i'm an alcoholic

[littlea34]

Hi, this is my first time on this website or any help website for that matter, so i'm feeling a bit nervous.  I have a family history of alcoholism and it terrifies me that i'm going the same way.  i'm sitting here trying to make excuses for why i drink but at the end of the day they're just excuses.  Basically i come home from work most evenings and pour my self 2 maybe 3 glasses of red wine - not all at once of course!!! then i feel guilty and have 2 or 3 cups or herbal tea - yes herbal tea, i'm one of those condesending gits that tries to eat organic, consumes no caffeine then guzziles wine !
I feel this is more of a habit than an addiction as if i'm busy i'm not too bothered.  

I'm a full time working mum, i have a great husband and family.  I have a great job - a little stressful at times but thats the way i like it,  i like to do the best i can at mostly everything, unfortunatley i suffer from bouts of depression.

I just what to find a happy medium, where i dont feel guilty and i can start enjoying life to the max.  At the moment i feel like i'm stuck in a rut!!

[ibizan]

hey lady so good to hear from u!glad things are better for u..keep a going..Little hasn't posted since 2007 and for some reason like they can and will do a polished troll appeared...hope he is gone or on way to Springer show......but it got u to post so lets keep hearing from u!

[TJack]

Hi Little,  we may have all started like you and not really thought there was a problem.
Oh how fast it escalated for me.  Then I could not quit!  I am typing this and almost 1 month since my last glass of red wine.  Sure it sounds good, but i know it is poison for me.  Hey Rodd and Ibi, i went into a hospital for a week in Beaverton, Or.  Cedarhills hospital.  For alcoholics, drug users and people with depression.  Saw a psychiatrist every day for a week.  She changed my anti depressant and i have to say, i Feel so good.  It took about 2 and a half weeks but I FEEL GOOD. I am happy and having a life instead of isolating and just concentrating on the next bottle of Merlot.  So, Little i guess the first thing I had to do was OWN it and then my poor husband saw how depressed i was and i think he was actually fearful of what i might do to myself, he found this hospital and i was in there in a matter of 2 days.  Good counseling etc.  But, i do believe the change in my anti depressant has been a God send for me.   Happy to be back on board and Little hang in there.  Keep posting and good luck to you.  TJ

[rod44]

LMAO.....I guess I had better be good so and keep ye updated, as long as ye are not after me pot a' gold, some say there is no such things as leprechauns although I did have some  encounters when I was drinking.....

the hospital misplaced my MRI scans and the Neurosurgeon would not do anything until he had the films so everything is in a bit of a mess.....
Ray

[dominosarah]

Yes Rod keep us updated on you......you dont want ibizan and i to have to hunt you down!!!

[ibizan]

u have a good memory...all his posts got deleted....yes i love the humor and sober/clean camaraderie here.....rod-pleas keep us informed...know u will!:)

[dominosarah]

I am most grateful for u 2 on here also and the rest of the people.  It feels comfortable coming here and we understand and support each other.  We also share the same type of humor!!!  gotta love it...........sara