Am i really bipolar!?

[boozypirate]

I have been diagnosed with bipolar but i don't know if i do have it... I am 18 years old, I got diagnosed by a doctor, a psychologist and a psychiatrist last year and this year. I have been getting symptoms for about 4 years. For the past year and a half i have abused alcohol and drugs regularly. But even long before I started doing that I had a number of depressive episodes lasting anywhere from 5 days to months, where i am very withdrawn and mentally dull. I feel like my brain is switched off. I cut myself but never very deep and i've tried to kill myself once. I have had a few episodes mania (or hypomania? Or nothing! I don’t know) I have a rapid flow of ideas, like my brain feels like a pin ball machine, I laugh uncontrollably/hysterically at nothing and everything, I’m silly and forward, I believe that I am a genius and have a special connection with the universe,  my  senses heightened - everything looks beautiful. I feel jittery, like I’m crawling with energy, creative, energised, euphoric, I say everything I think, I have an increased sex drive and make bad decisions like taking new drugs without even a split second thought. BUT the reason why I dont know whether i have it is because i feel really normal again. I used to get much worse and much longer episodes now they are infrequent and only last a very short time, this is weird because I am NOT on any medication. I have also stopped going to the doctor and councillor. The only thing that is different is that i know i have it and my family does too and now every time they can see me becoming depressed my mum will do all sorts of things to cheer me up before i go there. So does this mean that i have it or was it just a phase? I sort of feel that maybe I am just being overly sensitive and me going to the doctor in the first place was just an over -reaction which has now caused me to be labelled with a diagnosis.

[Bubulous]

Hi and welcome to the forum

Yes it is likely you are bipolar.  I am not a doctor but your symptoms are too obvious to be discarded. You may not be a genius but you likesly have abilitys that most people don't.  That is the gift part of it.  You will also experience depression that only 1 percent of the world could relate to.  That is the curse part of it.  Knowledge is power and you could gain alot on here.  Keep coming back and let us know how you are coping.

Good Luck,

Larry

[lindahand]

What you describe sounds like bipolar disorder to me. Like it is coming out of the text book. It is a cyclical illness so it doesn't follow a pattern necessarily, and learning to manage things can help. People can go decades between episodes and then get hit again. So just make sure you keep a watchful eye, and if you start heading into hot waters you see a psychiatrist before it becomes full blown.

[thatquietgirl]

18 is about the time it shows up in most people. From what you describe, you sound like you have bipolar disorder.  Three different people have agreed on a diagnosis, too.  It's perfectly normal to doubt your diagnosis at first.