Aa
endurance, toleration and bearing continuous work
My employer is understanding about my illness. Thanks God. I didn't know that he knows already and that all my colleagues also know it. Seemingly something one can't hide. Yesterday I told him I can't come to work because I have some mood swings trying to avoid the word bipolarity and of course the very ugly manic-depressive, he spoke with me in a way that looks that he is quite aware.
My problem he said that I demanded more work to do, feeling that i am OK and even more competent than my colleagues, but then as soon as he assigns me a task I feel stressed after a short while and i start apparently to cycle. He realises this.
Now my question: I remember when I fell ill in 2002 and was diagnosed OCD probably wrong, I had still a stamina for work, i.e. I would sit for hours studying while in college, then by the years my stamina diminished and now I do some reading then got fed up much more quickly than I used to be. My father who is not bipolar agreed that he himself has the same feelings but perhaps because he is 64 so it's time to retire from everything. Perhaps he said if the subject i read is interesting then my stamina will return.
Few years ago, I was taking some 9 pills and more, now only 3, so I can't say my illness is deteriorating, or perhaps one can't keep going on drugs because eventually they have a destructive effect on the brain. I am not talking about the quick side effects but rather their long use.
How one can endure and bear tasks, or is it difficult for us
thanks
My problem he said that I demanded more work to do, feeling that i am OK and even more competent than my colleagues, but then as soon as he assigns me a task I feel stressed after a short while and i start apparently to cycle. He realises this.
Now my question: I remember when I fell ill in 2002 and was diagnosed OCD probably wrong, I had still a stamina for work, i.e. I would sit for hours studying while in college, then by the years my stamina diminished and now I do some reading then got fed up much more quickly than I used to be. My father who is not bipolar agreed that he himself has the same feelings but perhaps because he is 64 so it's time to retire from everything. Perhaps he said if the subject i read is interesting then my stamina will return.
Few years ago, I was taking some 9 pills and more, now only 3, so I can't say my illness is deteriorating, or perhaps one can't keep going on drugs because eventually they have a destructive effect on the brain. I am not talking about the quick side effects but rather their long use.
How one can endure and bear tasks, or is it difficult for us
thanks
I have the reading problem as well due to bad concentration. In fact I didn't know he even said that he had that problem even though I read it and I reread it again and saw he did, which is due to my concentration being so bad.
I don't know about the laws in your country either. :( I wish I did.
I can tell you the reading thing is the same for me. I can't read for too long on one article or topic. Even a couple of paragraphs is hard for me sometimes, even if it is something I think is interesting. I just can't focus and I get frustrated with reading. I used to be able to read for hours on end, now I can't focus on one book or article for that long.
Also it seems the stress at work pushes me toward hypomania. I don't have much stamina for tasks and I have asked for frequent breaks. Despite this, I still received a bad review saying I have poor time management skills. I have poor time management and judgement skills due to hypomania, which is why I asked for frequent breaks as an accomidation. I get my work done, but it is hard to concentrate and focus. Plus, I my thinking become disorganized and gets worse the longer the hypomania lasts. So even here with the ADA I don't know what I can do. :(
Just know you're not alone. Work is so hard every day.
I can tell you the reading thing is the same for me. I can't read for too long on one article or topic. Even a couple of paragraphs is hard for me sometimes, even if it is something I think is interesting. I just can't focus and I get frustrated with reading. I used to be able to read for hours on end, now I can't focus on one book or article for that long.
Also it seems the stress at work pushes me toward hypomania. I don't have much stamina for tasks and I have asked for frequent breaks. Despite this, I still received a bad review saying I have poor time management skills. I have poor time management and judgement skills due to hypomania, which is why I asked for frequent breaks as an accomidation. I get my work done, but it is hard to concentrate and focus. Plus, I my thinking become disorganized and gets worse the longer the hypomania lasts. So even here with the ADA I don't know what I can do. :(
Just know you're not alone. Work is so hard every day.
It's called the American Disabilities Act I believe. I don't know many details about it though. I think you've got to learn how much is too much for you to handle, day to day. Do less if you're down. Take care of you. I haven't told me boss... she thinks I am on meds for depression. I wouldn't have said anything at all if I didn't have to leave for appointments. Sometimes I wish she did know, but at the same time I'm afraid they'd find a reason to fire me. :(
Especially when I am in a down swing, it is very difficult to keep motivated and get anything done. I wish there was motivation in a bottle. :/
Especially when I am in a down swing, it is very difficult to keep motivated and get anything done. I wish there was motivation in a bottle. :/
Its best to discuss with your psychiatrist what medication combination would work best for you. I am not aware of (although I should be) of any workplace laws protecting the rights of people with disabilities where you are so asking for a reasonable accomodation might be not be something you are entitled to by law. But if you can think of some ideas on what has made work achievable for you that your employer might be willing to accept it might be worth discussing.
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