family & holidays

[tres1965]

, well my Mother did her Wicked Witch  

[ILADVOCATE]

Was this part of a question or the whole thing? What is the question about your mother? Are you concerned about your mother's impact on you? Or does your mother have bipolar disorder? I have recovered from schizoaffective disorder but I do have difficulties coping with my mother's bipolar disorder as she is not under treatment yet but will be. So I understand both aspects. But perhaps you could be more prescise for us as to what really went wrong.

[tres1965]

oops!
I don't know what happened to the rest of that post...so sorry! My Mom, Brother, me, my beautiful daughter Kai, we all have Bi-polar. My Dad suffers from severe depression that is slowly crippling him. His Mother fought her own silent battle with a form of mental issues. My boys have a different Dad & so I pray it wasn't/isn't passed to them!!
Thnx , Tres

[ILADVOCATE]

Yes but all of these are treatable. I was able to recover from schizoaffective disorder with experimental treatment and now I live with severe tardive dyskinesia which is much harder to treat but I am finding treatment that has mitigated it. I think of myself as living with a disability. If its genetic it might be inherited but many people have recovered from bipolar or depression. If you find the right medications, therapy and support from people it is something people can recover from and learn to live with. Its important just to see it as a part of your life. Not one you wanted of course. But one you cope with. If your father has severe depression and nothing is helping him find out what else is out there is the way of treatment. Here's a good resource for mood disorders:
http://www.psycom.net/depression.central.html

[cowgirlnerd]

I don't think you truly "recover" from BP - you become stable and that's a sliding slope that is helped with meds and therapy.  It's an incurable disorder and yes, we are disabled, but I don't think we can really recover (if you are meaning cure), but we can, like you said, learn to live with it.  

Tres1965 - I am sorry for your issues you are dealing with.  Cut your Mom a little slack maybe???  What did she do?  I guess I am sympathetic because I am a Mom - we screw up sometimes  - especially with BP!  What did she do???

Rach

[kgill78]

hhmmm...sounds like my mom lol

[ILADVOCATE]

No. There are many disabilities that are not reversible but it could be said one "recovers" from them. A person with epilepsy who takes anti-convulsants most often (though there are some people who do not respond and still have seizures) does not have seizures again. That is correct that a fair amount of people do have some moodswings with treatment for bipolar. However, I have schizoaffective disorder which is as psychiatry is finding is a more severe variant of bipolar with psychotic features. As I've explained in many posts I'm on an experimental antipsychotic glycine, a glutamate antagonist in Phase II FDA study. I've been identified as recovered and the results are going to be documented in a psychiatric journal. My disability, tardive dyskinesia is physical. I don't hear voices or have any manifestations of schizophrenia and with a mood stabilizer the mood fluctuations are relatively minor. I don't think of myself as "cured" but being that my recovery has been identified as "as good as on any FDA approved anti-psychotics or better" I'm recovered from schizoaffective disorder. I do agree with the post about how to treat your mother. With my recovery, I do not emotionally react to my mother's moodswings and I explain to her often the terms "stay factual" meaning not to make things emotional that need not be instead of becoming angry at her about it and she's learning to use that technique for much of her life, as I have, that what she thinks is a "crisis" is a solvable, workable issue with factual solutions and things will be better for her when she's in treatment which she is going to be as she's looking for a psychiatrist now.

[cowgirlnerd]

Good points - I just meant that a lot of people think we're somehow cured - oh don't we know we aren't!l!

I was recently diagnosed bp1 but my doctor is continuing to discuss the schizoaffective disorder from time to time.  What's the major difference in bp1 and schizoaffective?  I know it's in the BP family.

Your postings are always so informative.

[ILADVOCATE]

Bipolar has no aspects of psychosis. With bipolar with psychotic features, during a period of moodswings (mania, depression) a person has auditory hallucinations (hears voices) or visual hallucations or has delusions (perceives things that are not in reality). With schizoaffective disorder, a person can have hallucinations or delusions even when the mood is euthymic (normal). This information I obtained when I testified for the director of psychiatry at the presentation on new treatments and I asked this question of another supervisory staff psychiatrist as well so its factual. Other aspects of schizoaffective are cognitive symptoms (trouble communicating and writing) and negative symptoms (trouble relating to people). You might not have schizoaffective but bipolar with psychotic features. However, with both you would be prescribed an anti-psychotic. The one least likely to create the long term side effects of diabetes and tardive dyskinesia is Abilify. As for the treatment I am on glycine, in official studies its used as an adjunct (additional) antipsychotic but I am the first person to recover with it out of study as a primary (stand alone) antipsychotic. My psychopharmocologist will be publishing the document where it can be easily accessed in PubMd according to him. It is easily available from companies but I would not provide people with information as it should only be given under a psychiatrist's care. With permission of my psychopharmocologist I've been writing major providers and getting letters back. In the meantime here's a link to the official study with its use as an adjunct antipsychotic:
http://www.schizophrenia.com/research/javitt.htm

[tres1965]

Description of my Mom. She has always been sick, with her own demons. She was abused as a child, & she has never 'worked' on her issues. My Father is the closest to the norm as  possible. MMom did horrible to me but even tho' that happened I still work on those issuees even as a adult. My Dad was my savior MANY times.
Mom has trieedr suicide many times, & she is horriid as a G'mathner to this day.
Sometones it is possibkle to forgive, but not forget.
Sorry about the typing errors, This  shaking  right now is unbelieveable. They put me on Cogentin .5 mgs this last week & she thinks it will be doublked Thursday. I go to the Neuro tomorrow. The p-doc II saw yesterday, they decreased my Depakote another 250 mg for the mmonth! The p-doc also took mee off Buspar 30 mg. x 2, I said it was not doing anything so they removed it from the mixture. In 2 mth's they are reducing the Dep. another 250 mg...at my request  due to weight gain/. Then they are going to see about the Abilify since I've been on it ssoo long.. Thanks ILvokate..
takee care,  Tres

[cowgirlnerd]

I definitely have bipolar only.  I have the delusions; auditory hallucinations (I don't actually hear voices - I hear a running commentary of myself in my head, or humming or something like that - not another person, etc.), mania depression.  Maybe he was mentioning my psychotic episode during my suicide attempt.

Isn't it a little bizarre that we can just easily discuss these kind of issues?  Most people would probably be shocked at hearing these things.

ANYWAY, can you have psychotic episodes during mania/depression and it not be bipolar with psychotic features or is that actually what is?  Example - I have had times when my mania has been described by my pdoc as a psychotic break.  

[tres1965]

?
How did you know this, or have I discuued this with you in 1 of our posts?
(((as she's looking for a psychiatrist now.)))?
thx, Tres

[tres1965]

I've been on Abilify for the last 8 years with no sideffects. I have beeeen seizure free for the last year, so unless I haave a break-thru seuizue they are slowly removing it froim the mix. Thank God! The Neuro DR & the p-doc are going to talk to wach other before my next appoimthment..to fiogure out what,where,when? thx. yto yuour advice!

[ILADVOCATE]

As to your question that's complex. A manic episode is a mental change in that its a break from reality. A person's emotions are not normative to what is going on. It may impair judgement such as the grandiosity typical for mania where a person has an inflated sense of self importance. As for psychosis that is a sharp break from reality in logical and normative thinking. What one sees in schizophrenia are "thought insertion" ("people put ideas my head"), "thought removal" ("people can read my mind") and "thought projection" ("I can control other's people's thinking") as well as many other marked levels of removal from reality. As well as having recovered from this in representing people for benefits I know the criteria. However, there are levels of psychosis. A person who is psychotic is usually unaware of it. I think if your psychiatrist said you had a "psychotic break" that would more indicate bipolar with psychotic features as it occurs during manic or depressive episodes only, not outside of them in which case it would be schizoaffective disorder. Ask your psychiatrist what he meant by "psychotic break" as to what was exactly psychotic. Then you can understand better. As to the public being shocked I'm not sure. Be aware people can read any posts here but although I keep my name confidential unlike most case studies mine will have my full name in it. That was a request of mine. As well I was asked to do the draft for it based on standard case studies I had to read. Now my psychiatrist is editing it and revising it according to standard APA guidelines but it was in having a full sense of awareness and having recovered from psychosis that they gained a full understanding that I was recovered. Once it is a published document with my psychopharmocologist's permission it will be linked here with permission and outside of here anywhere appropriate so that more providers and the public can become familiar with new treatments in development. I have testified and spoken about my mental health history appropriately and judiciously to help others overcome a fear of disclosure or negative feelings about their disability online and in the outside world.  

[tres1965]

let's upddate if you don't mind? My typing is better, maybe it can be read now.
Some days I tremble so badly the letters just won't go where I want! Anyhow,
I think I should clarify a few things, pls? I love my Mom. There is nothing she
could ask that I wouldn't be there by her side! My Brother on the other hand has
totally lost it. He has full-blown delusions, 1 minute he will be sweet & the next
he's cutting up my Sister-in-laws clothes. Last week he poured bleach on them.
Just not right. He can't help it, he is ill, but darn it he is a great guy when he is
clean. Thank God the kids are old enuf' to feed themselves. I don't want to be
'down, or depressing, but I feel I can be honest...Tres

[cowgirlnerd]

I don't think we don't think you love your family.  We all have trouble dealing with relationship issues and those closest to us we sometimes have a harder time dealing with.

I have a hard time personally dealing with my family because my Mom is very judgmental and thinks I am being dramatic about the whole BP thing and just thinks I should "pull my self up by my bootstraps" and "Raise my hand to Jesus and be thankful for what I have received"...... she doesn't get it.  

Don't worry - you can be honest - we don't (usually) judge - at least not on this forum!  

Racheal