Sounds similar to my problem... My husband says we don't need help, and he has a way with words... big time. I don't know what to say, but if you do figure out how to stop your partner criticizing you, please let me in on the secret!
I concur. There is a pain there that needs to be resolved. A neutral voice can help.
Need to get into family therapy, it really helps with dealing with this sort of stuff. I hope it all works out for you :0)