bipolar mum.

[princessbetty]

Hi ladies. First off congratulations to you all. I'm 29, 10 weeks pregnant with my first baby and I have bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed in 2007 and have had extensive counselling and therapy and have been on medication since then and I am generally so much better than before but since getting pregnant things have changed. Some days I just don't feel right! I can't actually pin point what it is though. I'm still on my medication as my doctor said it would be far too risky to take me off. I'm also extremely worried about after I have the baby. I'm in a wonderful relationship and I know my partner will take excellent care of the baby, and me, but I just want it all to be perfect. I want to be a good mum and wife and look after my family but I feel like it's going to be my partner looking after us. Is any here bipolar and pregnant or already have children? Would love to hear how you got on.
Thank you x

[007Bunny]

Princess not far from me than. I live in Birmingham.
I am happy for you Betty. Great you have such a good partner. Also bottle feeding seems to be a good decision.
Preeclampsia goes in families - my mom had it with me. She had a stroke when pregnant with me.
I am sure you will cope well. There is many helps abailable for free. Also your partner has an experience with a baby so it looks very well for you. :)

[princessbetty]

Marie thank you. I feel so much better reading that. I'm so glad things are going well for you now and the bond you have with your little man is exactly what I want to have with my bubba.
I also have bipolar 2 so I know what you mean when you say you thought you was normal. I always think I'm normal when I'm going through a mania stage and when people tell me what I was like it's quite frightening.
My friend had preeclampsia but she wasn't as bad as you. You sound like a very strong person.
It's hard trying to explain to someone something they have no idea about so reading your story has really helped me.
My partner knows how important sleep is for me and he is willing to do night feeds and whatever else he needs to do. He done it with his first child, he had the baby with him for 3 months as his ex isn't a very nice person and told him to take his kid away from her. He is an amazing dad and the reason I've waited so long to have a child is because I wanted to have a proper family which I know I will have with him.
Thank you again Marie x

[princessbetty]

Thank you so much for your replies.
Pamela I'm in London and I had my first midwife appointment today where I told them about my bipolar so the midwife said she will tell her safeguard who will tell her what to do with me x

[007Bunny]

First of all congratulation for being pregnant. You have exicting time in front of you. :)
I have a son and he is 6 now. I was diagnosed bipolar 2 recently but obviously had problems all my life. I stopped medication whilst pregnant. It is great that your partner is supportive as you will need help. I had a really hard time when my baby was born as I had a preeclampsia. They told me 6 times I didn't have it but we ended up with emergency Caesarian in the middle of the night. As a result of preeclampsia my son was very tiny what was a total shock to me and I ended up depressed and crying. Preeclampsia means that placenta didn't work properly and therefore the supply to the baby is restricted and babies are small. For me it meant that my son was simply hungry and therefore born small and very skinny. I was very upset with all that. I was also on high dependency unit on tubes as they were scared my organs will failure. And I also had my baby and had to breast feed him. It was the hardest time in my life. I hardly slept two hours a day as tiny babies don't eat much - they don't have power to suck for long - and therefore don't sleep for long and feed very often. My ex wasn't very helpful as he somehow wasn't on my side and later back home he started to jelaeous at baby and it all went downhill. Three years later I had to get him to leave as I was able to kill him.
So it was a very difficult time for me but I always loved my son to bits and always put him at first place. There are many hormonal changes which cause quite a mess in brain. So I felt for about six months like brainwashed, my memory was affected etc - obviously lack of sleep wasn't helpful. As I was 'on my own' without any relatives to help I wasn't able to clean the house etc. I simply looked after my son and enjoyed him and didn't care about anything else.
I have now very strong bond with my son and he knows he is loved :). My son is my everything. Nothing in the whole world can compare to having a child. Nothing matters more.
During the years I had my depressions - which became more severe with years- and also times when I was perfectly normal (thats what I thought) but I overdone things, started new projects etc- long story. All on my own. As always my son is at first place. It is not always easy to cope so I even had to tell him that I am ill. What I think helped.
Please use any help you will be offered. You will need your partner to look after you as you will look after baby. The first couple of months are really hard but it gets better with routine. Try to think how you will get your sleep as lack of slerp makes us unwell. There are plenty of good strategies for new mums around eg. fiil up freezer with cooked meals so you don't have to cook when baby arrives etc. And really use any help you will be offered. It is a wonderful time in life and our little people grow so fast! Try to enjoy it. And as Pamela said - not everything has to be perfect (ha ha I always want everything perfect like you!). The main thing is that you will be ok. If you are ok baby is ok :). Washing, cleaning, ironing, cooking can wait or be done by soneone else. All the best and sorry for being so long. Marie x

[CRSeaside]

I just want it all to be Perfect.  That's putting way to much stress on you. It is a thought pattern typical of Bipolars.
  If you live in USA, in a major city, chances are good there are free support groups. Your husband can attend Family members bipolar support group  
   Check the DBSA web site for more info. Pamela