help.

[dangertocandy]

what does someone do if a love one is suffering though this and is getting the terrible pain in the neck area causing really bad headachs?

[survivor08]

First I want to commend you for your dedication and devotion to your wife (I assume-sorry if I'm wrong) because so many others dont have that kind of support!  

I have really been thinking this past week how truly blessed I am to have a husband that is still, after all these years, such a support to me.  The thing he does is he will notice when I am real bad and offer massage.  Bless his heart, he will rub as long as I want him to- even more than an hour.  He will help around the house, he will work all day and still come home and fix dinner, because he knows how bad it hurts me physically to stand in the kitchen and cook.  I work full time too, but always home before him.

My pain started struggles began to be more chronic in 1997.  At first docs thought I had MS and I just rem the worry in his eyes.  Fast forward to 2008 and I was dx'd w/cancer.  That liked to have done him in.  It was waaaaay harder on him than it ever was on me.  And now, knowing I will most likely be having surgery, he is already talking with his work, giving them the "heads up" that he will be needing time off.

His devotion, love and caregiving are what make all this easier to deal with.

You just keep loving, keep doing, and just try and notice when she seems tired, looks weary in the face (great sign of pain) and ask what she would like for you to do.

[*Stormy*]

Just wanted to say that you are doing the most important thing already...Having the kind of support that you are giving her is HUGE!! Finding a Chiari specialist is really important too...it looks like Selma has helped you out with that!

Good luck!
Carolyn

[dangertocandy]

10q for all your help.

[selmaS]

Heat always helped me as I have a problem with cold nething....cold makes me hurt more...so , ask her which feels better.......I am adding the link to our list of chiari specialists..please RESEARCH all drs to find the right one.....be advised u may have to travel to get to one...and our list is not all inclusive as it is compiled by the members here and the drs they've seen.

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Chiari-Malformation/LIST-OF-CHIARI-SPECIALISTS/show/1121460

"selma"

[dangertocandy]

not a problem. well her dr just sent her for a special mri to test the fluid, came back is now getting some other test done. last night she was in such pain she cried( which i hate seeing and why i am here.) i had her on ice off an on most of the night. she is going to see a neuro soon,  but her n i know she has this and all, the dr just wants a second opt to" rule out other things".  and if anyone can suggest a good dr, feel free to tell.

[selmaS]

HI and welcome to the Chiari forum.

Well, just what u r doing..learning more so most important u can understand.

Once u have the knowledge of  the types of tests that should be done it will be easier to find the right dr for ur loved one.

We r happy to have u join our little family here, sorry for the reason u had to seek us out.

"selma"

[dangertocandy]

awesome. i am there 100% for the gf and her situation. i was just wondering if there was anything like meds or just anything that would help, along with the heat and ice.

[Devin215]

Hello. I would say be open minded and sensitive to their situation. Listen to what they tell you and Massages sometimes will help with the shoulder and neck pain which will sometimes give temporary relief to the headaches. Heat and ice are a good thing too. Just be there to support them though the Dr's appointments and in general..