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4 year old freaks out with new activities
Our son just turned 4. He is a happy child, and a real leader in his day care class. His teacher tells us he likes to orchestrate activities and bosses the other kids around. Recently we signed him up for a T-Ball class which he said he'd like to try. Last night was the first night and he cried and carried on so much, without once joining in with all of the other kids playing so nicely and listening to the coach, that my husband took him, and his mortification, home early. Is this normal? he seems so outgoing in his daycare group, but new activities seem to totally unhinge him. He was like this for swimming lessons too but we kept going and eventually he got into it. How best to handle this?
Thank you!
Thank you!
Best Answer
I do not think this child has autism some children do find new activities over whelming,they are uncomfortable in a new environment .,
your son could have autism. they like to keep to a routine and most of the time dont like to try new things. ask to see a specialist.
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I am trying to read between the lines of what you wrote to see if more is going on with your son and I'd say, probably not. My son has sensory integration disorder which notoriously causes issues with new activities or things like birthday parties, etc. but you'd have some other signs that this was going on. I will tell you that a child that often is bossy/orchestating the other kids, etc.----------- that a term used for this by therapists is "inflexible" and it is often a coping mechanism. My son is does this as well. He seems like a strong personality but in reality he is trying to control his enviroment so he is comfortable. But again, you'd see other signs if something like sensory was going on. So, this seems less likely to me.
What might help is to have either you or his other parent as an assistant coach. My husband is always assistant coach so he is right there with our son. And just being patient is a good idea, I think. He obviously is feeling discomfort over the situation------- and you want him to think it is fun. I'd talk highly about the activity and not give him a hard time for the meltdown. But tell him if he starts to have a meltdown, that you will leave the practice. Then leave. If this happens several times, then he is not ready to be on the t ball team. If he wants to play t ball, he'll start to hold it together better.
My son at 3 and early 4 did have trouble being on a sports team. All the other kids were participating and he just didn't handle it well. He's now 7 and plays many sports. Some kids just aren't ready. Others like my son have other issues going on as well as not being ready.
Also, does he have any friends on his team? This helps. And getting something new to go with it can help make it worth being there for . . . in t ball, this may be a cool batting glove (not a catcher's mit, but a batting glove). Practice at home too so it does not feel like something new when he is there. I've played more sports in my back yard in the past 3 years than I did my whole life leading up to that! LOL So, get a t and do what they do at practice at your house during the week. good luck