4 year-old will not eat...

[jaceylynn]

My 4 year-old step-daughter will only eat a very limited number of foods (yogurt w/o chunks), cheerios, applesauce, peanut butter, and junk food.  Her pediatrician said she was malnourished and said to put "regular" food in front of her and nothing else.  "When she gets hungry; she'll eat."  She went 5 days with out eating (this felt like neglect to me).  We gave in and fed her her normal yogurt, cheerios, and PB.  She will cough up or vomit up in some cases anything placed in her mouth and she will sit at the table for hours if we let her.  She has never eaten "normal food," meat or vegetables.  

As an infant, she was shaken by her mother who then lost custody for a year.  Her father and I have residency but not full custody at this time.  And her relationship with her mother is extremely volatile.  I think this is a control issue but have no idea how to help at this point.  We have tried counseling but even a nutritionist couldn't get her to eat.

What do we do now?

[cbs62]

I agree with Rock Rose.  There seems to be an okay balance of what she needs.  My son is extremely picky and his pediatrician told me it is EXTREMELY rare for a child in the US to become malnurished because so many of our foods are fortified, such as the cheerios and bread.  What about a child's multivitamin?  Milkshakes are great places to hide proteins.  Keep on offering new things but I would not make a big issue out it and perhaps get a 2nd opinion on the malnutrition thing.

Cindy

[Jennifer375]

I agree with Rose in that it really doesnt sound like a control issue so much because her food choices sound fairly good. I would however refuse to allow her junkfoods as you called them except for once a day. Its POSSIBLE that if you do this hunger will call her to eat more of the foods you listed,, and over time her body may start craving other foods to fill in what she used to substitute with sugary/salty snacks. She may decide shes bord with eating the same thing over and over, I would.  It is important to make sure our kids arent using junkfoods as fillers between meals because it will effect her over all growth, how healthy her body develops so that her organs can function properly not to mention future health issues like diabetes and obessity.

Wishing you the best.. Jennifer

[RockRose]

I don't think it's a control issue because of the foods she chooses - these are all foods typical of kids with sensory defensiveness issues.

If she were picking a weird variety of foods that didn't have that common link - I'd say it was control.

Eating other foods is texturally abhorrent to her.  Like you feel at the beach eating,  and suddenly you crunch into a mouthful of sand.  You just want to open your mouth and spit it out!

Do you have reason to believe she's malnourished?  Is she lethargic and pale and sickly?

I see a good mix of dairy,  grains,  fruit,  protein,  etc.  I think some doctors are more into control than others!

Best wishes.