Anxious crying related to eating and discipline

[beedoo]

My daughter is just 5 and has been a fussy eater for a while - she has been having sandwiches at school until recently when she herself decided she wanted dinners instead.  However after about 10 days of school dinners she has become very anxious each morning about school and feigning illness etc, she can however be turned around mood wise into happily going to school but at lunchtime starts crying when going to the dinner hall.  She is also crying very eaily when being told off (not shouted at just firm voice will set her off).  She is a happy little girl most of the time apart from this pattern of behaviour - we ignore the crying as much as possible and I ask her to think about her crying and why its not a good thing to do which she does respond to sometimes..  I dont expect her to enjoy all her meals and can cope with her not eating all her lunches yet (she is also a slow eater which leaves her a little hungry as the school dont allow a huge amount of time for them to eat their lunch)  but the crying is upsetting for everyone as well as obviously for her - Im also concerned that her crying is putting off potential friends as  she is an only child and is a already a little bit of a loner at play.

[jdtm]

One other possibility - is your child being bullied at lunch time?  Did someone "steal" or "make fun" of her sandwiches and that is why she wanted the dinners?  Just wondering ...

[babygirl6152]

Did you say this is only school meals or home also?

There is anxiety with some children at school cafeterias. Mostly children that don't like noise- and believe me I worked almost every day in the school cafeteria as a monitor for 20 years- there is nothing to do about the noise level but fuss and fuss and the children DO get quiet/ for about 2 minutes/ then it is loud again..... Our principal even finally gave up and just said let them go to the playground as soon as they are finished eating.

You may try going up there and seeing about the noise level since you mentioned she is sensitive to loud voices.

The only intervention we had for children like this was to let them eat outside the lunch room perhaps with the counselor and a friend- maybe to make them feel as if they are not in trouble.

[margypops]

I am wondering if they rush the childrento eat, at school lunch, and if she likes to take her time eating this would cause her to feel anxious, so speak to her and give her the choice of sandwiches again, ask her if they do hurry the children to eat, this does happen,You are correct in not feeding into her behavior but perhaps talk to her and find out if she is unhappy about anything and why.