Can you please help me?

[patsyburrell]

My husband and I have been married over 20 years and we have a 18 year old daughter and 14 year old son.  My husband never give my daughter the time of day.  Her and I have always been so close.  It''s all different now, she never wants to be around me and it appears she hates the sight of me.  My husband has been going to her bedroom constantly laying on her bed and talking.  Then of course he says he fell asleep but this is now an everynight situation and now he wants her to go everywhere with him.  Their whole relationship is different.  Could he possibly be having sex with his own daughter?  What do you think is really going on?


This discussion is related to Sleeping in bed with mom.

[Kdon76]

Obviously him falling asleep in her bed on a daily basis is not normal. It's normal to bond but must it always be at night? Hopefully it's innocent, but the fact that your relationship with your daughter has changed also sets off a red flag. Trust your gut. Talk to your daughter in a non-accusatory manner. Try to find out what's causing the tension. Could it be your husband is opening up to her about marital problems & she's become resentful or could the cause be more sinister in nature. Regardless, start by opening the lines of communication with your daughter. After all, it's your duty to protect her.

[Stormie67]

At 18 a girl would already be involved with boys her age and less susceptible to whatever reasoning that has her father sleeping in her bed every night. So this has been happening since she was vulnerable enough to believe it if it is happening. Why would she hate her mother? Well two things. Either she's being lead to believe mommy is being hateful to her beloved father and a girl's first love is her father becomes twisted. She believes she can be a better wife than her mother. OR She hates her because she never SAVED her. She's in the same house night after night THINKING and doing nothing. Meanwhile this is HAPPENING to her daughter who is probably being told "see? She doesn't care about US. Daddy loves you so it's ok. She never busted in to stop him. She never opened the door to say hey babe come to bed. In her daughter's eyes she knew it was happening and did NOTHING. HIM? He is an animal. Put him under the jail. Personally he would be sporting a nice sized crack between his eyes from the Louisville the FIRST time he "Fell Asleep." Because I would check on him and tell him to come to bed or the three of us are sleeping on her bed.

[Meliss2012]

Go to eBay, buy an alarm clock that has a hidden camera.  They are 10 dollars from China and can stream video to your phone app.  

[deadsirius]

I wish I knew how this turned out. Are some men as terrible as a ton of people automatically assumed here or was it an innocent bonding time? I wouldve come in unsuspiciously and bring them like cocoa or something without any warning

[716hogan83]

So what's the results? I'd hide a camera... Wish.com has tons of hidden cameras u can plant in her room

[whenissomeday]

Hey, so I'm a girl, and I can tell you with 100% certainty that I would never have wanted my dad chilling in my room during bedtime at age 18. He would never have done anything to me, but I still wouldn't have wanted a parent hovering over me when I'm trying to sleep. That's weird.

Also, I dealt with molestation from relatives as a child, and this kind of shady lingering separate "quality time"  **** is suspicious as ****. That's exactly the kind of ploy predators use to separate guardians from their targets. This question is ancient, but if anyone came here with a similar situation on their mind: don't live with uncertainty and suspicion a minute longer. Get the facts right now, ask people what's up, see with your own eyes what's going on, and act accordingly. You are a PARENT before you are a WIFE. You have an obligation to your child. Your kid's safety is more important than your spouse's feelings.