Is my four year old bi-poler?

[mcherry85]

My four year old has had severe behavior issues since she could walk. She constantly back talk, will not do what she is told...ever, physically harms her sibling both younger and older. She has no fear of pain or consequence, she also harms the dog, hitting her and kicking her whenever she has the chance. She has also recently began to masturbate on a regular bases. I have caught her numerous times and in the past few weeks it has escalated. Today I caught her masturbating in front of her 9 month old brother and telling him to "look" at her. She is becoming more and more disturbing to the point where I bought the 'Total Transformation Package" from the info mercial and still had no results. I am at my wits end and I have no idea how to handle my own daughter, I made the decision today that I do not want her playing with her own siblings because of fear of what she may do! I do not know what to do, could she be bi-poler? Should I take her to see a doctor or wait until she is older?

[babygirl6152]

does she snore at night- does she sleep long? Does she have long naps?

Does she still have her adenoids and tonsils? Maybe her pituitary gland is not working if she rarely goes into REM sleep?

[mcherry85]

I have been working with her for 2 years now and it is not helping... nothing is.

[babygirl6152]

when a strong willed child is faced with being "FIXED" as you tried for a short period of time- they are up for the challenge. She wore you down quickly seems like on your quest for better behavior. Stick it out- It's not going to happen in 90 days- but you should see some sort of improvement when she sees you aren't going to give up- You sound exasperated,

How long did you try this new behavior plan- maybe I am wrong here maybe you tried it for a year-

[mcherry85]

Yes, she has been seen by a doctor. But only for the developmental issues. She was assessed as being delayed by her pediatrician. I am not sure if that is what you meant but that is the only place I have taken her so far.

[Angelinthemorning]

You need to take her into the doctor.  Alot of children with delays have emotional and behavioral issues as well.  You need to sit down with her doctor and work on a "plan".  Has she been given an assestment by a doctor yet?  Schools have early childhood development programs if you can't get her in to see a specialist.  With her delay, you should be getting more help.    

[mcherry85]

That is the problem I have done all of these things, and more, it does not work with her. She is very persistent and has no fear of consequence. I am afraid of what she may do from day to day. She doesn't care what might happen if she does things. I am to the point where I have thought about having her stay with a family member for a while to see if that may calm her down. She has been diagnosed as being delayed, she has the mentality of a child half her age and I thought that if she saw that I would not keep her in the house if she harmed her brothers and sister then she might change. But I have also thought that maybe she will see this as an opportunity to lash out even more. She also has this weird thing about food she is constantly hungry and steels food , even when she has just eaten and should not be hungry. But she never gains weight, in fact she weights only about 35lb, but she is short too so that may have something to do with her weight. I just don't know what to do anymore, I have already tried all of the things you have suggested and a lot of others as well and nothing seems to help. Is there anyone that knows what might be going on with my daughter?  

[Encephalomalcia]

Usually people with bipolar have extreme energy one day and nonstop talking and then the next day cannot get off the couch or out of bed with no energy at all and extremely quiet.  I think you need to sit her down at the kitchen table and have a serious talk with her.  She is old enough to understand.  Tell her that her behavior is going to change or she will have to deal with you and it will not be pleasant if she does not change.  Tell her how you expect her to behave.  She needs some real good straightening out and it will not be easy, but it will be well worth it.  It will take some time, so stick with it.  Be very serious with her and let her know that you are in charge and that you are the parent.  Don't be afraid to raise your voice.  She is trying to control her environment now and soon she will be telling you what she wants you to do unless you draw a clear picture of who is doing the parenting.  Setting limits and addressing situations immediately and consistently is what children need.  Good luck. You can do it, I did and I had the most spirited child who now is a very great kid.  I have four girls and every now and then they try to rise up above me and I have to let them know who's the parent.  Kids job is to challenge authority and parents job is to set limits and help raise kids to make good choices on their own.