11 Year old daughters behavior

[mommyof3girls78]

Hi i have a 11 year old daughter and she has anger issues, she is failing in school and ive done evrything i can to help with her homework , ive told her to bring home her books and even talked to her teachers! she will do good for a little while then stops! Her dad isnt a big part of her life , and i feel like she blames me for the way he is.she lashes out on me , not physical but raises her voice, back talks throws a fit when things dont go her way! i know she is preteen and the hormones are kicking in, but what do i do ? ive talked to her , ive told her she will go to a private school if she doesnt straighten up! ive taking her cell phone away , tv time away , computer , anything fun ive taking from her ! and that dont seem to work ! so im at my wits end and im asking for help ! if anybody can give me advice please do so! thanks and god bless! :)

[Sandman2]

   By the way, I just wanted you to know that the line in my last post about an "abusive parent", had nothing to do with you.  It was aimed at a suggestion by another poster - whose post has since been deleted.

[Sandman2]

  Just as all parents are not the same, nor are counselors or therapists.  I kind of wonder if an abusive parent would choose the best counselor for their child?
  I think margypops has some good ideas.
  The private school thing is not going to help much.  She will just be the same way there?
   What do her teachers suggest?  Do they think she needs any testing?  Has she always been this way in school?

[margypops]

Reading your post I feel a little counselling may help your daughter, if she is concerned and not seeing her Dad this would possibly have an effect on her emotions ,you say he isnt a big part of her life, I am sure that effects the way children feel, even after divorce they need both parents around .I would lessen the punishments and focus in on her positive side ,some praising when she does something right.Good luck parenting alone can be tough.