Should I be worried that my brother in-law is a psychopath?

[Bevanjoy]

So I've been staying with my in-laws for 6 months now and I've noticed that my 14 year old brother in-law is a bit scary. He is very nice and funny too. But he gets night terrors real bad, to a point where he punches walls,his bed, and self. He wakes up yelling and screaming and you can hear things crashing around in his room. One night my husband heard him having an episode so he opened his door trying not to wake him from it and saw that he was punching his bed yelling "don't touch me, get away!". After this he woke up and asked what my husband was doing and why he was in his room (he doesn't like any one in his room).
He also tells us he hates us, he doesn't love any one. He told me that if my 7 month old son died he wouldn't care. He says he Is heartless.
He doesn't bathe. It's a lot of work trying to get him to shower or change his clothes. He doesn't like being clean, he always smells. His room is dark and smells very bad (from not bathing) but also food and garbage. He only leaves his room when he needs water. He manly eats if someone brings him food or if everyone is a sleep he will leave his room to get food.
He hates school, he doesn't do any work. He is failing most of his classes and says his teachers should just die.
He has asked for guns so he can shoot his arm to see what it feels like. We had to get rid of a air soft gun because he wouldn't stop shooting himself in his arms, legs and chest.
He also plays a lot of video games and watches YouTube videos all day. That's all he does, he lays in one spot for hours on end watching Videos and playing games. He is  abscessed with my little ponies. He has them everywhere in his room. If you touch them he gets so angry he shakes.
One time my husband was using a fork to get peanutbutter out of a jar and he saw it and got very angry so he threw a butter knife at my husband and yelled at him to use a knife not a fork. He gets upset and aggressive over small things such as this. So angry he shakes.
I'm just worried because I have a son and don't want him to be in a place where someone might harm him.

[Zinnias1234]

I've been a psych nurse for almost 10 yrs and here's my take : this boy is def suffering from a mental illness , though determining what his diagnosis may be is not possible in this kind of forum and really doesn't matter at this point . What does matter is that his actions (throwing things , agitation) and wanting a gun to shoot himself tell me that he absolutely has the potential to be violent towards you, your baby and others as well as towards himself ( ie suicide. ) If I were you I would get myself and my baby out of that house -today.  If you want to get him help, try to get him to an emergency room. Ask to speak wth the attending doctor or nurse practitioner and tell them about his behavior and your concerns for your safety and his. If he refuses to go , you always have the option of calling 911 and depending on the laws in your state he could be held for psychiatric treatment regardless of what he wants if he is a danger to himself or others- which unfortunately is sometimes the case for people who are very Ill and unable to make the best decisions for themselves. Google your state laws or call the emergency department and ask to talk to a triage nurse if you need to know quickly .  Good luck

[KezzaLee]

Maybe he suffered from some form off abuse growing up. Are there any suspicious family members or even any mental health issues withing the family? Check in on his school life it could be the effects of bullying, peer pressure,drugs or maybe even traumatic films or life experiences that he just hasn't told the family about. I'm a girl and I'm only 19 years old but sometimes I struggle to sympathise with people; like I absolutely love my niece and nephew but I would have flashes of myself hurting them and I'd imagine it feeling good but I'd feel sick at the thought. It's quite conflicting but its most likely down to the fact that I grew up with abusive family members and I had to suppress myself to deal with it. Like I had to become completely unemotional to not      hurt them or myself in a fit of anger or fear. Maybe keep the younger kids away from him for the time being and try and get him to see a doctor. Weirdly enough it was my sister-in-law that helped me get medication and counselling and its really helped tone down the violent thoughts and reactions a bit.

[Lyme_aid]

This has the red flags of some sort of psychiatric condition, to me. Especially the hygiene issues. I would get him to a therapist as soon as possible- for his own safety and the safety of others around him.

[Sandman2]

    I agree with Annie, he needs professional help and the sooner, the better.  And from his comments of "don't touch me,"  it sounds like he has been molested.   His failure at school could be due to the above or something like ADHD - either way, he needs help.

[baby1209]

Move out then you will not have to deal with how he acts what he says or how he smells. He might be showing out for a reason.

[AnnieBrooke]

He does not sound normal, are you asking if there is help for him or are you just asking if you should get out of there for the sake of your child?  In your shoes I would move, it is possible that having your family added to the household is not making things better.  Not that you caused him to have these issues but probably adding more people to what was originally just a one-family situation has its stresses for everyone who is there, particularly those who were there originally.  Your husband should certainly encourage his parents to seek help for his brother.