Sleep problem with 2 year old

[papamo]

My 2 year old grandson has had difficulty sleeping from the day he was born.  He has night terrors which started at 9 months at which time he was extremely ill.  Naps were cut out several months ago with the hope that he would sleep 8 hours at night instead of 6.  Helped some.  He wakes several times a night, every night,  and has always done so; sometimes with a night terror, sometimes he grabs his legs and cries "ow, my legs".  He used to want us to massage them but doesn't want them touched now.  His legs also jerk when he is asleep.  He is in the low percentile of growth and speech is delayed (gets speech therapy)  I'm worried that the lack of sleep contributes to these delays.  He had an overnight sleep study ordered several months ago but the hospital sent him home at 2:00 a.m. because (go figure) they could not get him to sleep. Doctors don't seem to have any further advice.  Any suggestions you might have?  Thank you

[adgal]

I have no doubt your right about the lack of sleep causing problems, and it really sounds like your daughter is in a real catch 22 here.    I wonder about the leg pain as well.  Poor little guy, and I know how hard the not sleeping is on poor momma as well.  It sounds like they are trying everything I can think of, but I do have one last bit of advice.  Reassure your daughter that no one knows her child like she does.  If she believes there is a medical issue here, then never allow a Dr. to just pat her on the head and send her away, know what I mean?  It's hard sometimes to get Dr's to take concerns seriously, and never be afraid to get that second opinion.  I sure hope this gets resolved...its so hard.  All the best to you all.

[papamo]

Thank you both for the advice.  I will pass it on to my daughter.  He actually does co sleep with her but that doesn't keep him from the night terrors or frequent waking with complaints of leg pain.  They have a very strict bedtime routine, bath, snack, book, lotion and back rub time.  They give him melatonin and have tried lavender scent.  They are very careful with his diet and he does not get a lot of sugar.  He is extremely active and always has been.   I believe that being over tired could be causing the night terrors, but his night waking is what is making him over tired. He stopped napping at about 1 1/2 and his day caregiver (who has run this daycare for 25 years) said she has never seen any other child even close to him.  We will try what you have suggested and will continue to research to learn more about what could be causing this.  Thanks again.

[adgal]

My son is also just over 2 and has been a bad sleeper from the beginning.  In all honesty, the only thing that works for us is co sleeping.  He just seems to need that extra comfort at night.  From what I have read on the subject, some kids just do.

He is now 2 years, 4 months and in just the last month we are getting about 1/2 the week straight through in his own bed.  As tiredbuthappy said, he seems to just be starting to outgrow it.  One thing I have learned about him is that he is a "hot" sleeper (just like daddy).  So for him a slightly cooler room and lighter weight pajama's seems to be best.  I also find that a strong night time routine and consistancy in bed time really helps.  I'm not sure if this is true of all 2 year olds, but he must have 10 to 12 hours sleep.  That can be a combination of nap & overnight.  He also does not nap every day now, but on day's he does I make sure to wake him after an hour and 1/2, 2 hours max.  That seems to be the magic number for him to sleep well at night.   And the other thing for him is tonnes and tonnes of exercise.  He seems to be more active then some kids his age and the more outdoor time we have just running, the better he sleeps.  On bad weather days I take him to an indoor playground.   But little physical exercise on any day, and I know it's going to be a bad night.

Best of luck to you!

[tiredbuthappy]

my little ones were both terrible sleepers and had night terrors too. My pediatrician said they would outgrow them after a few years- my older one did around 4 yrs old. The little one just started to improve at 2 1/2. I don't think there's a magic cure- you just have to try different things. For example, I recently learned that mine wake far less if they have a snack before bed. They also do better with white noise, and woke less when the room is a specific temperature (for them, it was 75). Some children sleep worse when they are overtired. My kids are like this, and they actually wake more at night if they don't nap. Other kids need lots of extra exercise during the day to help them sleep at night. You can also look at things like diet. Is he eating healthy, balanced meals? Is there a lot of sugar or artificial preservatives or dyes in his food? There are some who believe that all of that can impact a child's development. Some children do better with melatonin. I know of a few people whose children have developmental delays who benefit greatly from melatonin. You can talk to a ped or naturopath (or maybe pharmacist?) about whether or not it would be appropriate to try it with him. I know melatonin has helped me tremendously (my kids got the bad sleeper genes from me!).
Good luck. Can't hurt to play around and try tweeking routine. Soothing bath, warm milk, chamomile tea... there's reasons why these old wives tales have been around so long.