temper tentrum

[hwhamid]

my5 years old  son is accused of doing insulting language in class. he told me he didn't do that they misunderstand the situation, and from the 20 years experience i have in raising children . i doubt that he did something like that because he doesn't  know that this kind of insulting way exists, and it appears when i question him, that he doesn't understand the insulting word at all. in our community we do not use this kind of insulting way> how can i know that he is telling the truth or not . to punish him, especially the teacher didn't hear him personally . and if he did it how can i deal with the teacher and with him

[benjimom]

I agree with Sandman, not enough info.  Schools are  like this from my experience and of course you were not there to know the WHOLE situation.  You will never know all that happened or precipitated the event.

[hwhamid]

thank you so much for the answer, i was discombobulated, do not know whether i ll take a severe action and punishment or just talk to him about it and teach him it s wrong. well i did what you suggested , thank you again

[Sandman2]

  Essentially, you don't have the information to make a decision.  It would not be unusual for a child of his age to use a word he heard on the playground which all the kids reacted to, and not have a clue what it meant.  Also if the teacher did not hear him say the word(s), there is no way to know if the report was accurate.  I am surprised the school even notified you if the account was based on hearsay or second hand evidence.  
   Either way, you don't punish him.  You do let him know that the word in question is a word he should never say and if you ever hear reports of him using that word again, he will be punished.  Teacher wise - unless she brings it up again, I would ignore it.  She was probably just doing her duty to keep parents informed.