unruly child??

[supermom30]

My daughter is 3 1/2 yrs old and very intelligent. She is sweet as pie, interacts as well as any only child with other children and learns very quickly but there is a problem...her temper. It happens most frequently in the evenings but now more and more it is anytime of day everyday she throws fits. She will stomp around the house shouting "I'm angry!" She will throw things, hit and destroy anything in her path. She begins to breathe heavy and seem uncontrollable and unconsolable. I am raising her on my own and my biggest concern is that something is wrong with her. She wants told me when I asked why she was doing this that she is "sick". Her father is bi-polar and once diagnosed with some form of adhd or add. I worry all the time now when this happens if this is normal or if something really is wrong. Once she calms down, usually between 5-30 minutes. She will apologize and ask if I am mad. So long as I say no, it will be over until the next one. Is this a sign of trouble or normal behavior? Am I overreacting or should I prepare for the worst?  Please, any advise would be helpful.
Supermom 30

[supermom30]

Thank you for your advise. I appreciate any feedback I get.  I have been told that my daughter is too smart and she could be "playing me" but I wouldn't believe it. Now, maybe she is. Is still doesn't take away from her excessive behavior but I am working towards a "resolution" for that too. I just read an article about red 40 that had me looking over all my groceries and I am so surprised! I buy her v8 splash because it is lower in sugar and supposedly healthier than other juices and this dye is in there! As I read over the effects of the dye on children I shook my head. It was describing my child. Here I thought I was keeping her healthy and it turns out that I am spending extra money contributing to her aggressive behavior!  I threw all that stuff out immediately and now I am working on a healthier alternative all around for my baby girl. We have an appointment next week with a child therapist just to make sure I am doing all I can now to curb her outburst while she is young WITHOUT prescriptions.

[Natta1980]

Mood disorders and ADD traits run in families.....
I would defenitely look into anger management techniques for children
She may not necessarily be bi-polar or be ADD/ADHD, but the earlier you address these behaviors the better

If her violent behaviors continues to escalate, you can get evaluation, even if she is "diagnosed" with something (she is not likely to be diagnosed with either of the above conditions because of her age), it will allow you to learn how to deal with her and find the best approach. Nobody can push you into medicating - behavioral techniques are most likely to do the trick

With my son (dad has a mood disorder and possible undiagnosed ADD) - calming techniques help great deal - taking deep breaths, counting to 10, drawing an angry picture (i.e. he was screaming that he will punch a hole in a wall - he sees daddy do that once in a while - I gave him a crayon and a paper and told him while punching a hole in a wall is not acceptable, he could draw it. So he did. And tantrum did not happen). I also found that yoga/martial arts help tremendously with self-control

Good luck:)

[Encephalomalcia]

What do you say when she asks if you are mad?  What do you do?  Do you hug and kiss her and say you are not mad?  If she does this I would simply say to her "You could have been having fun doing something, but you wasted all your energy being mad".  Do not become sympathic toward her.  You can be empathic, but do not try to feel what she is feeling.  By her asking you how you feel and apologizing, I think she is playing it up and it's not real, just an attention ploy.